Sermons tagged with Relationships

Good to see everybody. Thank you for coming this morning. I assume that the inflated attendance for a very cold rainy day in which we're planning on snow is because of your deep interest in me preaching on guarding your heart and not the building update. So with that being said, I'm happy to take up the next 30 minutes of your time while you wait for the information that you actually want. Before I do that, some of you will get this joke and some of you will not, but if there's a little context here, I just want to say that the Steelers lost in the playoffs and they lost their head coach. Good. Go Bears! you some context. Mikey introduced himself as a longtime visitor. Here's why that's funny. First of all, Mikey and the ReSARS, they predate me. They've been here longer than me. They've given more blood, sweat, and tears to this place than I have. And we were talking about Discover Grace, and he said, I've never gone to the class. Am I a partner? And I have some people ask me that sometimes. And I told him, I don't care how much you've given, how much you've served, what you've done, or how involved your family is. If you don't listen to me talk about grace for an hour, you are not a partner. You're a visitor. So he introduced himself as a longtime visitor. And I've always said what partner, partner is what partner does. We kind of Forrest Gump it. If you partner with us, because at Grace we say that we have partners, we don't have members. And the real simple reason is because members tend to consume and partners tend to contribute. So we want us to think of ourselves as partners in the same entity. We're not looking for rights and privileges as members. So that's why we use that terminology. And I've always said partner is what partner does. If you're actually partnering with us, you're coming to small group, you're attending, you're giving, you're serving, you're partnering with us to move grace forward towards wherever we think God wants it to go, then you're a partner. So if you're out there and like the Rezars, you've been coming to the church for longer than me, and you're wondering, am I a partner now? My response to you is, I don't know, do you think you are? And if you say yes, then I agree with you. But if you want to come to Discover Grace, that's just a way for you to familiarize yourself with the church and our background and our systems and what we do. So we'd love to have you, but we're not real uptight about how to become a partner. You do what you like is our philosophy because I do what I like, so it's only fair. This morning we do continue in our series, You'll Be Glad You Did. And the idea is that if we'll listen to the wisdom of Proverbs, who was written by who the Bible says is the wisest man to ever live, King Solomon. If we'll listen to Proverbs and implement them in our lives, we'll be glad that we did. And we've talked about friends. We've talked about being generous. And this morning, I want to talk about this simple concept of guarding our hearts. This comes out of Proverbs chapter 4, verse 23. It's a verse that I would bet that most of the room has heard, but it's this. Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it. Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it. And so I wanted to take some time this morning to talk about this concept because here's what I think is probably true. Here's what I think is probably true. I think it's probably true that a vast majority of you have heard this concept before. I kind of doubt that there's anyone in the room going, that is new information that I should guard my heart, and out of it everything flows. Maybe there's some, and that's fine, but most of you probably already know this. And so the impetus for me is to go, yeah, yeah, yeah, we know it, right, sure, but let's take some time and focus on it. Because many of us probably learned this when we were children. We probably learned it when we were young, and we've always kind of carried this ethic in our head. We know about it, but maybe we haven't considered it in a while. So I thought it would be worthwhile, as I this series on Proverbs and kind of planned it out, which by the way, I'm now, I'm almost done planning out our next series, which is going to be in Romans. And we're going to move through Romans chapter by chapter. And I'm so excited to do that because I don't know if I've said this from stage or not, but I really, really love preaching through Scripture and talking about it, and I really, really don't love talking about topics like guard your heart. I like the next one better than this one, but I think that the church needs both, and I think that we need to do both, and I think that we need to rest ourselves in this topic today because it's an important one. And here's why it's so important. Whatever flows into our heart flows out of us. Whatever flows into our heart flows out of us. So as we consider this as adults, guard your heart for everything you do flows from it. And we try to just put fresh eyes on it and take 25, 30 minutes to consider it. I want us to focus on the important parts. I want us to think about it as grown-ups. And the reality to me that comes out of this verse is that the reason we guard our heart is because everything else we do flows out of that. Everything we do flows from it. The way that I was taught this principle was when I was a kid, I was taught that you're a cup. And when you get jostled, which jostled is a great word. When you get jostled, whatever has been poured into that cup will spill out. That's the idea. Every morning, I drive Lily to school at NRCA. Lily's my daughter, not just some girl that I drive to school. I drive Lily to school at NRCA. And when you pull in, you have to go all the way around, and there's all these speed bumps. And it's really annoying, but I guess I understand. If I were running an institution where teenagers daily drove, I would have myriad speed bumps as well. So I get it, but I don't love it. And you go over the speed bumps, and the ones that are head-on, just direct, are pretty manageable. But there's some that are on an angle, and those are maniacal because they rock your car in a bunch of different ways. And every morning before we leave, I make a water bottle for Lily, and I fill my cup with ice and water. I have this all the time. So I fill it with ice and water, and it's close to the brim. And we go over the speed bumps, and I now have to, as we go over the speed bumps, I pick up my cup and I hold it like this to allow my arm to adjust for the bumping so that nothing jostles out of the cup, right? But what's going to come out of that cup, if I forget, and sometimes I do, is just water. It's harmless. It just gets on my center console there, and it's fine. It's not that big of a deal. And it helps me think about the way that we get jostled in life when we hit speed bumps, when we get bad news, sometimes when we get good news, when someone frustrates us, when our partner lets us down, when our children annoy us, or even worse, they disappoint us, when we don't get the deal, when we lose the client, when our team loses in overtime, what comes out of the cup when we are jostled? What spills out onto the people around us when something happens to us? Here's what I think. Sometimes, and I'll be honest with you, it's not very often, and you can ask the other people that work with me at Grace. You can ask Gibby. They've worked with me a while. Kyle, our family pastor, has worked with me for about a decade. Aaron's worked with me since I got here. I don't think I've ever snapped at you guys. I don't think I have. I snapped at Gibby one time. He deserved it, though. He had it coming. I don't think I have. Someone's clearing their throat over there as if I've snapped at them. I don't think I did. But we snap at people, right? And it's usually our family. It's usually our kids. The other day, the other day we were getting ready for school and Lily is 10 now and we told her at 7.27, go get your things and put on your shoes. And at 7.37, she was untying her shoes to put them on. And I snapped. And I looked at her at the kitchen counter and I said, put on your shoes. Put them on. And she started doing other stuff. I said, stop that. Put on your shoes. And she, of course, because she's a little me, mouthed back at me. And I said, put on your shoes. Stop what you're doing. Put on your shoes. Put them on. Go. Go. Put on your shoes. Go. And I snapped at her until she was really upset. And she goes and she puts on her shoes. I shouldn't have to ask you three times in ten minutes to put on your shoes, and I think every parent can relate to that. But here's the thing. Me snapping at that and borderline losing my temper says a lot more about me than it does about Lily. Lily's 10. I'm 33. I'm surprised that was as funny as it was. Lily's 10. I'm a grown adult. Whatever was in my cup spilled out on her. That wasn't her fault. And that wasn't the way to handle that. And what I think is, and why I tell that story about myself, is first of all, you're all in glass houses right now. So throw stones if you want to. But second, thank you, Kay. Second, for all of us, when we get jostled and we lose our temper with someone and we lose our patience with someone, I believe it says a lot more about us than it does about them. And what it says about us is it forces us, if we really want to think about it, to look at what have we been filling our cup with. Because I just got rocked. I just got annoyed. What spilled out? And when it's vitriol, when it's anger, when it's frustration, when it's put on your shoes, that tells us a lot more about what we've been consuming than about what's happening in that moment right there. And I'll be honest. I don't know how much space there is for us as followers of Jesus to snap at other people. There's one time in the Gospels when Jesus snaps and it was to turn over the temple table. So there's a place for godly anger and frustration. But I'd be willing to bet that that place is a lot more rare than what our experience is. So with that in mind, when we talk about guard your heart for out of it, everything flows. That's what I'm talking about. When your cup is jostled, what will come out? When you're frustrated, when you're aggravated, when you're in a difficult situation, what comes out of your heart? Is it kindness? Is it frustration? Is it tenderness? Is it anger? Is it empathy? Or is it condescension? What comes out? I think that's important. And so I wanted to talk this morning about three ways really quickly that we can guard our hearts so that when things happen in our life, the right things come out, that we exude the love of God. From his fullness, we have all received grace upon grace. So when things happen in our life, can we be the kind of people that when our cup is jostled, we pour out grace, we pour out love, we pour out patience, we pour out empathy, we pour out honor, we pour out praise. Can we be those kinds of people? I think that we can. So if we're going to do that, we need to guard our hearts. So there's three ways I want to look at, and there's plenty more than this, but there's three ways I want to look at to guard our hearts so that when things happen in life, the right things come out of us. The first one is the easiest and the most obvious one. We guard content. We guard content. I have never stood up here and told you guys what you should and shouldn't watch. You're grown-ups. If you're saved, you have the Holy Spirit. You watch whatever you want. I just know that there are some shows that I've tried to watch that made me feel, and this is a highly technical term that I learned in seminary, icky. They just made me feel icky. And I just kind of knew, this is not good for my soul. I'm not going to watch this. There are some shows that I've watched that made me feel icky, but they were really good, so I watched them anyways, and I shouldn't have, because they weren't good for my soul. So we should consider what we consume. And I'm not going to give you my standards from a 33-year-old man on what you should do and what you should consume. But what I will say is the content that you do consume matters a lot. And let's be honest about this. There has never been a more consumptive generation of people on the planet than us. Right? Think about it. In the span of human history, who has been able to consume more information than you in a given day? Because we have that stupid germ brick that lives in our pocket that we pull out at stoplights and whenever we get bored and whenever the kids talk too long and we start to scroll. And we can consume. And when the germ brick's not going, the TV's going. And when the TV's not going, we're on the computer. And maybe, maybe, if you're erudite and sophisticated, you pull out a book, something in print from like 1985. Wow. But we are the most consumptive generation that has ever existed on the planet. And most of us consume constantly. And for most of us, our life is filled with noise. And so I would just stop and ask you this morning, not to direct you in one way or another. About what you should or shouldn't do. But I would ask you to consider. What are you consuming? When you pause at the red light. And you grab your phone. What are you looking at? When you have a free moment. And you turn a podcast or a book or songs, what are you listening to? When you have a free moment in the office and you allow yourself to search the internet, what are you looking at? What are you consuming? What are you interested in? And I'm not here to suggest that anything you're consuming is directly nefarious, although some of it is. But what I'm saying is it may be perfectly innocuous content, but is that what you should be consuming? Is that helping you? Is that guarding your heart? Are we looking at the right things? And I remember it was, I don't set myself, I've told a couple stories today about how terrible I am so let me tell you about a good decision that I made. I guess it was about two and a half or three years ago now. It was still called Twitter. Now it's called X. But I just realized that I spent a lot of time just scrolling Twitter, just killing time, scrolling Twitter, seeing what the people were saying about the things. And I realized that everything I saw made me angry. It was inflammatory. Someone's outraged about this. Someone has commentary about this. And as I scrolled, half of the content was designed to just make me angry about a thing. And after doing that enough, I said, you know what? I'm not doing this anymore. And I took it off my phone. And that was two and a half years ago. And it was actually three years ago, because I remember it was February. It was a real tough day. And I haven't missed it at all. So some of the counsel or encouragement to you is just, if it's true that everything we do flows out of our hearts, and if it's true that to prevent things flowing out of our heart that we need to guard it, then it has to also be true that the content that we consume is really actually very important. And so I'm not trying to give you pastoral advice and strictures about how you should organize your life. I'm just encouraging you as adults, what you consume matters a lot. So what are you consuming? What are you watching? Because a lot of us, particularly now, and you're going to think, when I say this, my suspicion is that you're going to think that I'm criticizing whatever side of the political aisle that you're on. You're going to assume that I'm on the other one and I'm telling you that yours is bad. I'm not. But can we acknowledge that a lot of news, not all of it, there's some good stuff, is designed to inflame us, is designed to anger us. And we as Christians, if that comes out of us when our cup is jostled, should consider how engaged we are with those things as well. So we guard our content. Here's another thing we guard. And this one you probably didn't see coming. But we guard empathy. We guard empathy. Years ago, I had a good friend. She's still a good friend. And she was telling me about her son, Bergen, who was 8 to 10 at the time. And she said that Bergen had developed an interest in ornithology, which makes me really disappointed that the farmers are not here today. Jacob would love this because he's a huge bird nerd. And that's what ornithology is. It's bird watchers, for those that don't know. And even my comment there is a tell to the point that I'm intending to make. She said that Bergen loved bird watching. He was really into it, wanted to get the binoculars. He was like reading books and doing all this stuff. And I remember just saying to her, they were homeschooled. And I remember saying to her at the time, I'm so glad that Bergen is homeschooled so that he can invest himself in that hobby. Because if he went to school, he would get made fun of until he quit watching birds. And we might giggle, but that's actually a really sad thing. I think that stinks. The world has a way, the vet is nodding her head, she likes birds too. The world has a way. The vet is nodding her head. She likes birds too. The world has a way of kind of crushing our sincerity out of us, of kind of crushing our optimism out of us. The world has a way of molding you as you grow up and telling you that what you like is not okay. What you like is not cool. What you do is not good. What your hobbies are are nerdy or they're wasteful or they're whatever they are. And the world cruelly has a way of crushing our sincerity out of us. And so as I thought about how do we guard our hearts, I thought it's worth mentioning that the world has a way of crushing our empathy out of us as well. And that as we encounter tragedy, as we encounter hardship, as we encounter trouble, and we see it in other people, because we see it so often, we can begin to become, we can allow our hearts to become calcified against the needs of the world around us. Right? We can let our heart grow hardened so that we no longer care about the people that we interact with day to day. So that we're no longer moved towards the things that should move us. And what we can do is we can allow the world and its pressures exerted on us and on our souls and on our hearts to calcify our hearts in such a way that we no longer have the capacity to care. And I would say that our capacity to care about others is one of the most important things a Christian can do. Jesus himself said, whatever you do for the least of these, you do for me. So when we stop caring, and when we are not moved, and when we, listen, this is tough, but I think it's true. When we are not people who are actively involved, actively involved, and I mean that, actively involved in helping the least of these, it may be because our hearts are calcified. And we have not adequately guarded them against the onslaught of apathy that comes from our culture. So one of the ways we guard our hearts is to keep them tender and to make sure that we maintain empathy. The last way that I want to mention this morning, there are more ways again, but the last way I want to mention this morning is that we guard our relationships. If we want to guard our hearts, we guard our relationships. It's funny, I made, I wrote up these notes this week and was already thinking about this topic because I think it's true. And then just yesterday, had lunch with somebody. And the story was, essentially, I've always looked up to my dad. He's let me down lately. And it's really messed me up spiritually. And I've talked to my therapist about it. And I might have to cut him out of my life. I don't know what to do. And because of my multiple degrees in psychology, I knew exactly what to tell him. But I was only able to tell him what you guys would tell him. You need to decide what the appropriate boundaries in your life are for him. You need to decide to what level you're going to give him access to you. You need to decide how much, in plain terms, he's able to hurt you. We need boundaries. Because this is a person that he looked up to spiritually. And that person had let him down. So now, that relationship that he had in his life that really didn't correlate with his spiritual life is all of a sudden impacting his spiritual life in such a way that it's detrimental. So if we're going to guard our hearts, we have to guard our relationships. And I'm not going to spend a lot of time here because, as I joked, I'm not a therapist. But I do know and I have seen that we can have toxic relationships in our life that cause us to spiral in such a way that we lose our sense of spirituality and we begin to lose spiritual health and our hearts are not being guarded because we're making them subject to a person that's not treating them well. And so in some ways, as grown-ups, if we want to guard our hearts, we have to guard our relationships. My larger point, and I'll finish with this, is I would just like to implore you to consider what it means as a grown-up to guard your heart. What are you consuming? Not just content, but what's your environment? How much are you protecting your own empathy? Just consider as grown-ups what's going into your heart, what's going into your soul, And when your cup is jostled, what's coming out? And what do you want to come out? And if what's coming out right now isn't what you want, then how do you fix that? If you'll think about that, I believe you'll be glad you did. Let's pray. Father, thank you for this morning. Thank you for a church that loves you. Thank you, God, for a church that can laugh. But God, I pray that this morning we would consider what we're consuming. We would consider what we're letting in. We would consider what's helping us and what's not. God, I ask these things in the name of Jesus. Amen. Hang on just a second, band. I got tripped up in my prayer because I forgot this verse that I wanted to share with you, and I'll finish with this. Because to me, it's the most impactful verse I've ever read about what we should consume. Paul finishes his letter to the Philippians after all the encouragement that he gives him with this final exhortation. And I think it's a good way to end this sermon today. Finally, brothers and sisters, this is Philippians 4.8. Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable, if anything is excellent or praiseworthy, think about these things. May that be our standard.

Well, good morning, everybody. My name is Nate. I get to be one of the pastors here. Thanks so much for joining us. I'm making grace a part of your Sunday morning. If you're watching online, wherever you are, whatever you may be doing, thank you for joining us in that way. We are beginning our new series, or we're continuing in our new series, called You'll Be Glad You Did. And the idea is to take the wisdom of Proverbs, proverbial wisdom, written by King Solomon, who the Bible claims is the wisest man who ever lived, and to look at some of his wisdom and say here at the top of the year, if we confront ourselves with it, if we listen to it, I bet, I bet that by the end of the year, you'll finish 2026 being glad that you listened to the wisdom of Solomon here at the top of the year. You guys will have to forgive me. We've got a small contingent of Bills fans in the church, and they're all sitting in the front row with, I even forget the name of those pants, but there's a particular, what's the name of those kinds of pants, do you know? Zubas, yes, that look like zebra stripes, and then Susie's got on the best fan shoes I've ever seen in my life, so I just need to say that out loud before I can continue as if there's nothing happening right in front of me. But we're looking at this proverbial wisdom, and one of the reasons I wanted to do it, and one of the reasons I wanted to spend a month looking at the wisdom of Proverbs is because one of the best things I've ever done is to take very seriously reading the book of Proverbs. You've heard me say, hopefully multiple times, that the greatest habit anyone in their life can develop is to wake up every day and spend time in God's word and time in God's presence through prayer. And I still believe that to be true. And there was a season where for three years, every day, I read a Proverb dated as just read a chapter. It's a great place to start. And if you want to read your Bible and you don't know where to start, you don't know how, that's where I would encourage you to begin. If you are someone who reads your Bible, I will tell you that most days for three years, I read whatever proverb was commensurate with that date, that day, and then read whatever else from the Bible I wanted to read that day. And those were some of the richest three years of my life. I immensely enjoyed it and never got tired of reading those Proverbs. So that's a good place to start. And if you hear nothing else from me today of any value, but you leave here and you go read Proverbs every day for the next year, I promise you, you'll be glad you did. This morning, we're going to look, did you like that, Tom? This morning, we're going to look at a proverb about generosity. And I said this in the Gracevine this week. I send it out. And if you're here and you don't get the Gracevine, you don't know what that is, and you would like to receive it, just please fill out a connection card or email me, and we'll get you on that distribution list. But I said in the Grace Find this week that we were going to be talking about a proverb on generosity. And those of you who are my church friends and church people, you know that generosity is pastor code for give us some money. Generosity is code for I'm going to preach a sermon compelling you to give to the church because we need to get some stuff done. And I want to ally that fear this week. Maybe that's why it seems a little bit more thin this week than last week is because I sent that email out. Those of you who have been here for a long time can attest to this. I've never preached a sermon trying to get you to give to grace, nor do I think that the New Testament teaches that you need to give 10% to your local church. I don't even think the New Testament teaches you need to give 10%. I think it just is a good marker based on something that happened in Genesis with Melchizedek and Abraham that we'll talk about later. But I don't even think the New Testament teaches you that. So you'll never hear me preach a sermon trying to compel you to give to grace. So that's not what we're doing this morning. But what you will hear me do, hopefully, repeatedly, is preach sermons on generosity. And the sermon on generosity would make particular sense this morning as it relates to the strategies and desires of grace, because you guys are well aware, we just had a big push towards this building campaign, and we're're hitting go and we're going to try to be in there by the end of next year. So that's particularly relevant to our church. But that's not what I'm preaching about this morning. I can tell you that next week one of our elders, David McWilliams, who's faithfully operating the camera back there, is going to give us an update. We had end of the year giving. We have some very good, exciting news to share. He's going to give us an update. We just want another week to get all of our numbers together so that what we present to you will be the most accurate thing possible. We don't want to talk in what ifs and hypotheticals. We want to talk in precision. So David's going to do that next week. By the way, David has been serving with Jim Adams for a year now as elders, and we still have yet to bring them up here and pray over them because I'm not good at planning things like that. Also, just while we're here, Wes and Doug served for six years, and I was supposed to bring them up here and pray for them too. I've not done that yet either. So Wes, David, Doug, Jim, sorry. But as we think about generosity this morning, I think this proverb allows us to frame it up in a very robust, encompassing way so we can think about the idea of generosity from a more holistic view. So let's look at Proverbs chapter 11, verse 25, which simply says this, a generous person will prosper. Whoever refreshes others will be refreshed. I don't think that we think about generosity the way that Solomon frames it up here. First of all, he says, a generous person prospers. And we should be careful there because we're tempted to kind of fall into a health and wealth gospel that says, the more that I give, the more that will be given back to me monetarily. The more money I give away, the more God will bless my bank account. And that's really terrible teaching, and it ends up making poor people poorer. So that's not what we want to do. So we have to understand what prosper is. And we have to open ourselves up to maybe it means more than just prospering financially. And one of the ways that we prosper is what follows. He who refreshes people will be refreshed. The people who refresh others will be refreshed themselves. I think that opens us up to what prosperity there actually is. But I like this verse because it doesn't tell us how to be generous. It just tells us to be generous. And that the more you give to other people, the more you refresh others, the more you restore the souls of others, the more you look out for others, the more you care for others, the more your soul will be refreshed. And I think that's a really helpful and valuable way to think about generosity. And the truth of it is, God has always wanted his children to be characterized by generosity. God has always wanted his children to be characterized by generosity. All the way back at the beginning of the Bible, beginning in Leviticus and Numbers and Deuteronomy, where the laws are meted out for the ancient Israelites, for the ancient Hebrew people. God is very diligent and fastidious about making sure that his children are generous people. He says, care for the widows and the orphans and the aliens and the sojourners, which means care for those who can't care for themselves. Care for the widows because they have no way to make money and no one's paying for them. They need your help. Care for the orphans because they have no way to take care of themselves. Take care of them. Take care of the sojourners, the aliens, the people who are foreign, who are coming to your country from other places. We should always have a heart for them and their plight. So take care of them. And God gets so specific as to give this law in multiple places in the books of Moses. When you harvest your fields, leave the corners there, healthy, ready to be picked. For who? For the widows and the orphans and the aliens and the sojourners. Leave that there so that they can wean from your crop. That ethic, that ethos is there from God at the very beginning of the Bible. And then we see again, Abraham meets the king of Salem, a mysterious figure, the most fascinating figure in the Bible to me, Melchizedek. And he, upon meeting him, gives Melchizedek 10% of everything that he has. And this 10% law becomes called the tithe, and it gets written into Jewish law, Hebrew law, which we inherit in the New Testament. And it was so extensive that they gave, those who were being as righteous as possible, would give 10% of everything that they owned. They would literally empty the pantry and give 10% of the cream of mushroom soup can that they had and give 10% of the spices. They would give 10% of everything. That's how important it was to God to write it into law to do in that way that his people would be generous. Then we get into the New Testament and we see Jesus teach generosity over and over and over again. And listen, almost every time it's taught, it's taught to be generous in order to care for the have-nots. It's almost always taught as don't tithe to be obedient, don't tithe to be blessed, but give what you have to give to take care of the people who don't have something to give. This is the story of the widow's mite, where the rich man gives a bunch and the widow gives all she has, and it's two pennies. And Jesus says she just gave more than he did to the kingdom of God. We cannot argue with the idea that our God has always wanted his children to be characterized by generosity. With that in mind, I would like for us to consider how we can be generous. We're going to swallow the frog and do the obvious one first. We can be generous with our finances. We can be generous with our finances. This is the obvious one, and this is where our brain goes when we think about generosity. And so I'd like to talk about this, but then spend the rest of our time on other ways to be generous. But I was listening to a book recently, and some of you guys like to judge people for listening and not reading, because you're stuck up. And it was by an author named Scott Galloway, who is, it's difficult to define what he does. He sits on boards, he runs companies, he's a professor of economics at NYU, and he's someone that I find interesting and thoughtful. And he wrote a book called Notes on Being a Man, and that's something I've thought about a lot is I've got a son named John who's four and a half. And I don't know why the half matters. He's four. I'm a grown up. And then I have a daughter named Lily who's going to turn 10 here in a week. And I think a lot about what is it that I want to teach to John that I don't want to teach to Lily? What is it that Jen, my wife, should teach to Lily that she doesn't teach to John? And I don't have a good answer for that. And I would invite this, if any of you have answers for that, I want that discourse. Particularly if you're a little bit longer in the tooth than me. Then I really want to hear that. If you're shorter in the tooth, maybe just relax. But he wrote a book, Thoughts on Being a Man, and I would, the only criticism I have, I'm not recommending it to you. There's cuss words, so as a pastor, I cannot recommend it. But the only critique I have is I really think it would better be titled Thoughts on Being a Human. Because the things that he was espousing in there didn't feel to me like things that only men should think about. I think women should think about these things too. And Scott is a devout atheist. He has respect for people of faith, but he's not a person of faith himself, and he's open about that. But in his book, and he's become, by any stretch of the world's measure, very successful, all right? He's in his mid-50s, really successful dude, flying on private jets when he goes places, that kind of thing, all right? But here's what he said, and this is what I thought was interesting that I wanted to share with you. He said when he started his career, it was all about accruing for himself. It was all about what he wanted to get. It was all about getting rich and getting more for himself and just build, build, build, build, build. But that one day, once he felt like he had enough, there was this seismic shift in his mindset. And he became a lot more interested in being a generous person than being an accumulator. He realized it made him feel good. This is wild. It made him feel good to buy dinner. In his words, it made him feel like more of a man. In my words, I would say it made you feel like more of a grown-up. But the way that he phrased it was, it made me feel like more of a man to buy dinner for my friends, to take my friends on trips that I could afford and let them come. It made me feel like more of a man to give things away. And again, I'm not trying to be over-masculine here. I think it really makes us feel like more of a responsible human. But he said that there was this shift, and after that shift that he made this decision, that he made it his goal to give away more money every year than he spent. Not more money than he made, but give away more money than he spent on himself. And he said, in doing this, it makes me feel better about myself and about who I am. Makes me feel like a better human. This, to me, and if Scott were here, he might push back on this, but this, to me, is an atheist nodding towards the way his creator inclined him to be. What he was saying in his book was, when I refresh others, I am refreshed. And I realized it made me feel better to give away my resources than it did to accrue them for myself and my own selfish ends. And my challenge or my thought to the church this morning, because this is a room of largely church people, is if an atheist can stumble upon the simple joy of generosity and find in his own experience that he is refreshed by refreshing others, then can't we as Christians learn from that lesson and be people who seek to be generous? I told you the story a few weeks ago of the former student that I have, a kid named Alex. He's not a kid anymore. He's in his 30s. He graduated in 2010, and he and I haven't had a ton of contact since then, but I've always thought very highly of him and been glad that he's been in my life and that I had the opportunity to be in his. And he had a tough story and ended up not going to college. He had to watch his brothers when he was 19 years old. But he found a way and he became a general contractor. And some of you know the story, but just by way of refreshing, he reached out to me a month or two ago, and he just said, hey, I'm making good money now. That's not what he said, but that's pretty much what he said. I'm making good money now. I want to be generous. I want to give. I want to honor God the way that he's blessed me. I want to bless others. What can I do? And he, to answer that question, drove. He had a job in Charlotte. He lives in Atlanta. So he drove the day before the extra two and a half, three hours from Charlotte to Raleigh, met me, took me to Sullivan's where I got a bone-in filet, which is really great. And then we met in my office and I said, hey man, here's six nonprofits that I know of whose founders I know very well, who I trust and love. Let me just tell you what they do and you tell me where, and then you just do whatever you want. I don't need to know, but then you can kind of figure out where your heart's led, which ones of these capture you, yeah? And that conversation led to him having breakfast the next day with the founder of one of the non-profits and then giving that founder the largest single donation they've had in the history of that non-profit. That's cool, isn't it? Now listen, Alex also told me in that conversation, in our discourse about wanting to be generous, that out of this desire to simply be generous, he had a job in downtown Atlanta. They were building a building or they were refurbishing one or whatever. There was a job with a fence and the things and all the stuff. And he would go there every day. And he said on his way there, he would go to the ATM and get out cash. And keep it in his truck. Because there was homeless people surrounding this job site. And he would make sure to go around and give money to every homeless person that was there. Because he felt like he had the opportunity to do that and he wanted to do it. Now here's where our brain goes. Okay? And here's where mine went. Dude, that's not wise. There's a better way. I love your heart. There's a better way to give money than to do that. And that's why he and I were having the conversation. Let's think about a wise way to do it so we can make sure that that money's going to God's kingdom. We can make sure that's an effective expenditure. But here's why I tell you this story this morning. It's to say that what I truly believe, and this is just my opinion, you may disagree. What I truly believe is the spirit of generosity that led him to give in both situations, whether it's a large donation to a responsible nonprofit or smaller multiple donations that we really don't have any control over, in God's eyes are the same. Because it's not about what we give. And I don't even think, and I'm careful when I say this, because I do think we need to give to God's kingdom. But it's not about what we give, and I'm not always convinced it's about where we give. It's about the fact that we just give. So we should be generous financially, whatever that looks like for us. We should also, I believe, be generous with our time. This is not a way we think about generosity, but it is a way we think about our days. And the story that I will share about being generous with our time is actually critical of me, which is what I would prefer. I'd much prefer a story where I look bad than to tell you a story where I'm the hero. So I'll tell you a story where I look bad. In November, we went home for Thanksgiving, and I needed to preach that upcoming Sunday. My dad is a CPA. He has his own firm, and he was going into the office on Tuesday morning, and I said, hey, dad, can I come into the office with you? Excuse me. I said, can I come into the office with you on Tuesday? I need to write a sermon. I've got a couple things to do, and I'd like to get that done and be done with it so I can just focus on family this week. He said, sure. So we rode to the office together. And on the way to the office, I'm thinking about, and I think some of us can relate, I've got a lot of work to do. I have a very important task to write a sermon for 145 people to listen to. This is the most important thing happening in the whole world. Thank you for the laughter over there. That was what was intended. But that's where my head's at. I have to get this done. I have to do this. And there was some other things I needed to do. So I was really focused and I was in what we call in my family task mode. Like I'm not interacting, engaging. I'm just trying to get stuff done. And so we get to the office and we're walking in and dad stops. There's a car pulling in and he stops and he says, oh, that's so-and-so. And he kind of steps back. Like he's going to wait on so-and-so to get out of her car and come see us. And this is where, if you'd like to be disappointed in me as your pastor, this is a great place to start. I looked at dad and I said, what difference does it make? And he went, okay. And we went inside. Because my thought was, dad, this is just practical brain, okay, I'm sorry. Practical brain. I'm never going to talk to this lady again in my life. I don't know who she is. She only knows who I am because I'm your son. I don't want to talk to her. I have a job to do. I need to get done quick because my wife has the kids with her mother-in-law out on the town. And she'd really like me there as a buffer, frankly. She'd like me to be there. I need to go. So I need to get this done as soon as I can. I need to get in the car. I need to drive to Monroe and go to some stupid store I don't care about so that I can hang out with my family. That's what I need to do. That's the pressure that I feel. So when dad says that so-and-so, I think, who cares? What's it matter? And so he's like, okay. So we go inside. My sister works for dad and she had brought us Chick-fil-A biscuits that morning, which are the worst of all the biscuits. And they really are. They're the worst. And she has the Chick-fil-A biscuits, but I am grateful it's free biscuit, fine. And I said, Dad, where can I work? What conference room or cubicle are you going to tuck me into? And he says, well, you know, you can, one of those down there. He goes, but don't you want to eat first? And I said, again, practical brain. No, Dad, I'm visiting you for three days, all right? I don't need to have breakfast right now. I'm going to go eat the biscuit while I write the sermon and get my important work done. And so I said, no, Dad, I'd really just like to get to work. He's like, okay. So I go get to work, and I write the sermon. I text Jen. I'm done. Where are you guys at? I go to the thing, and we do the things. And then, this is why I'm telling you the story, that evening, Dad snaps at me about something that was pretty innocuous. And those of you who, I have a good relationship with my parents, but Dad and I can get on each other's nerves. And those of you, Kristen's nodding her head as she sits next to her dad. All right, perfect. Let's just unpack this right now, Sartoriuses. If you have grown kids, you know you can get on their nerves. If you still are fortunate enough to have your parents, they know how to get on your nerves, you know how to get on them. We got on each other's nerves. And I thought it was silly. And I finally, I didn't snap, but I just kind of said, I don't know what you want me to do. You know, we were talking about whatever. And I just, like, I needed to go. So I stepped away. And I came back after a calming down period of 72 hours. And it was like 15 minutes later, I said, hey, Dad, I'm sorry. That's not how I want to handle that, but here's what's upsetting me. And he said, I understand. And we started talking. And here's what I learned, and this is why I'm sharing this story. He said, son, essentially, you matter a lot to me. I talk to you a lot. I talk about you a lot to my employees. And it would have meant a lot to me for you to have taken the time to have met them and to be gracious with them. But you were too self-important and you couldn't. And that's why I'm upset. And I went. What a lesson. What a lesson. I don't like saying this, particularly on a permanent record. But he was right, and I was wrong. I was so focused on my tasks and what I needed to get done that I couldn't see the value in investing my time in people. And so I missed a chance. How much better would my afternoon have gone if I would have simply been generous with my time and honored my dad? How much more refreshed could I have been by taking the time to meet the different people that he wanted me to meet. How arrogant of me to think that I have nothing to benefit from small talking and exchanging pleasantries and shaking hands and learning names. What, honestly, what a jerk. And so it was a lesson. Be generous with your time. How many of us have opportunities throughout the week when someone imposes on our time and we have a task or we have a thing that we want to do, but this coworker has texted us, this coworker has popped in, this person has emailed us, this person has called us, this friend needs us. It might be dinner time, but they don't normally call at this time, so what are they calling about? How often do we have opportunities to be generous with our time that we miss for whatever reason? Maybe your reason isn't task-oriented self-importance like me, but maybe it's something else, but how often do we have the opportunities to be generous with our time that we miss because we don't think of those times as opportunities for generosity. We just think about them as impositions on our schedule and on our tasks. I'm reminded as I think of this, every time I read through the Gospels, I am amazed at Jesus' generosity with His time. Those of you who have read through the Gospels, can you recall the amounts of times that Jesus finishes an arduous day or week of ministry? Does the Sermon on the Mount, heals people, speaks to people, casts out demons, teaches, combats with the rabbis, and then once that's done, it says Jesus went off to a quiet place to pray. He went off to be by himself and to rest and recruit. And here's what stuns me is how many times in the gospels it says after finishing a day like that or an event like that, Jesus goes off to pray by himself and on his way to do that, someone says, Rabbi, can I talk to you? Will you talk to my mom? Will you come meet my son? They need you. And Jesus always, sure, what do you need? Yes, I would love to. Yes, let me talk to you. Yes, let me pray to you. Jesus is the greatest example of someone who is generous with his time. And I think, I suspect, that we can probably all be more generous with ours. The last idea about generosity I want us to consider is that we can be generous with our spirit. We can be generous with our spirit. We can be generous with our disposition towards others, with our assessment towards them, with the benefit of the doubt we are willing to give them. I had a friend in college named Paul Honeycutt. Paul Honeycutt and I, we played on the soccer team together and we did the landscape crew together. We were in charge of keeping the grounds of Toccoa Falls College pristine and we did great. It was a fun job. I got to do the zero turn mowers and the weed eaters every day and I loved it. And Honeycutt was this really interesting guy because Honeycutt was cool. Everybody liked Honeycutt. Everybody did. He had all the friends in the world. And at this stage in life, try to remember, you know, I've been in high school and now college and cool people are cool. Cool people, they make friends easily. They make friends well. And they tend to be a little bit exclusionary in the way they move through the world. If you're not as cool as them, they're not going to give you their time. They're not going to be as nice to you. It can get to be exclusive, right? And so that was my experience of cool people. And Paul was cool. Everybody liked Paul. But Paul was unique in that he was kind to everyone. We ran in the same circle, and I watched some people try to get into the circle, and other guys in the circle would kind of hold them in arm's length. I don't know if you're going to cut the mustard. I don't know if I like the cut of your jib. What a great phrase that is. But I don't know. So they kind of hold them away. But Paul was always the first person to welcome them in and to make them feel like a part of things and to be a good host and to be a generous person with his spirit. And I remember asking him one time, this is now 25 years ago, I think, and I still remember the conversation. I asked him something to the effect of, Paul, you're so nice to everybody all the time. How are you this nice to everyone? And Paul said this simple phrase to me, and I'll never forget it. He said, Nate, if they're cool to Jesus, they're cool to me. Isn't that great? If they're cool to Jesus, thanks Jeff. If they're cool to Jesus, they're cool to me. If Jesus likes them, I do too. And here's the problem for us Christians. Jesus likes everybody. How inconvenient is that? I don't know. I've thought about this over the years and I'm not going to make any declarative or definitive statements this morning. I really don't know how much space there is for us to choose to not like somebody. I don't know how much space there is for that. I don't know how much space there is for us to just hold a grudge against somebody. I don't know how much space there is to think the worst of somebody and write them off. Now listen, I want to be very careful. I'm not asking us to trust everyone and to make ourselves vulnerable to everyone and to return to painful relationships when they've burned us in the past and it's hurt so much. I'm not asking you to be unwise. Scripture says that we should be as innocent as doves and as shrewd as vipers, and I think that that absolutely applies. But what I am saying is, I'm not sure how much space we have to just choose to not like someone and write them off. If they're cool to Jesus, they're cool to me. And unfortunately, Jesus likes everybody. So I think maybe you don't have something to learn from my buddy Honeycutt, but I still do. And here's where I would say this too, and I say this carefully. Our country is very divided right now. We know that. By simply saying that statement, everybody in this room just tensed up about 25%. Here's my estimation of part of that division. Is that we are not generous in spirit towards the people who don't vote like us. And what I've noticed is our tendency is to think and assume the worst of them. But what if we would be more generous in spirit and assume the best of them? Not just politically. People who think differently than us. People who don't share the values that we do. People who don't root for the bills. What if we started to view generosity as being a way to assume the best of others, to believe the best of others, and to give them the benefit of the doubt whenever we could? Let me tell you what would happen. Not just on a church level, but on a personal level. It is refreshing to refresh others. This series is called You'll Be Glad You Did. If you will listen to the wisdom that Solomon wrote down, you'll be glad you did. This week, we have an opportunity to consider what kind of people we are in regards to generosity. And my main point is, how refreshing would it be to spend this year being more generous with your resources, with your time, with your spirit, with your demeanor towards other people. And here's what I would challenge you with. If you think about these things, and there's other ways to be generous as well, but if you'll just think about these things. How can I this year be generous with my finances? How can I this year be generous with my time? How can I this year be generous with my spirit towards others? I highly doubt you'll finish the year and think, I wish I'd have kept more of it for myself. Let's pray. Father, thank you for this morning. Thank you for this church body, for this family. Thank you for the love that we share and the community that we have. God, all of us in this room have been given resources. From your fullness, we have received grace upon grace in different ways. And I pray, God, that you would increase our heart and increase our desire to be people who are characterized by generosity. May we be people who are happy to give, who are happy to refresh others, and in so doing find that you refresh us as we do. Give us the eyes to see and the ears to hear opportunities for generosity. And give us the willingness to step into those. In Jesus' name, amen.

Well, good morning, everyone. My name is Nate. I get to be one of the pastors here. Thank you for joining us at Grace. I was late into the service this morning. Anecdotally, I'm just indulging myself. This has nothing to do with anything. I was just happy with the moment. When I was growing up, I got in trouble at church all the time. Me and my best friend, PJ Smith, we got kicked out of every ministry that ever existed at our church because we were troublemakers. And my senior pastor, a guy named Buddy Hoffman, used to, in Sunday night service, back when we encumbered our pastors with having to preach two sermons on one Sunday, he would call me out, Chris, stop talking to Karen, or do I need to get Donna to come down here and sit between you two? Like that kind of stuff in the service. And as a 12-year-old, that's mortifying. And I just remember that as what my pastor did. And I was next door refilling my water and getting ready to come over here. And there was a kid that got a little sideways. And the teacher had to pull him out. And the kid wasn't really listening to the teacher. And so I had to crouch down and get real stern with said kid and say, you're going to get right. And he says, she's not my mom. And I said, yeah, you're right, but she's your teacher. And if you don't listen to her, I'm going to go get your mom. And it was just like, and she said, thanks, Nate. I was like, you're welcome. Also, Carly, it was your, no, I'm just kidding. It was not, it was not, it was not. This morning, we're in our second part of Daniel, where we're going through the first portion of the book, the narrative portion of the book, and looking at these stories and asking what we can learn from them and what they have for us now. This morning, we arrive at the story of the fiery furnace, one of my favorite stories in the Bible, in the Old Testament, and I'm thrilled to arrive at it now. It's a story about Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego, but years ago, I went to Honduras on a mission trip, and I got to know a man named Mark Searcy, who's a custom home builder in western North Carolina. But in his teenage and 20, in his late teens and 20s, he was a missionary to Haiti and has this missionary background. And he's really southern and really. And one of my favorite humans I've ever met. And he's, he told me that, uh, that I'm not going to tell him what, I'm not going to tell you what he calls, uh, Nebuchadnezzar. I'll tell you if you ask me after the service, I'll tell you, but I'm not going to tell you from here. Uh, he, and he said that Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego are the demon names for those boys because their real names were Benadab, Mishael, and Hananiah. Those were their Hebrew names that all meant some sort of praise to God. And they were renamed by the Babylonian government, Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego, what we know them by. And those are their demon names because those give praise to the Babylonian gods. And I'm not sure how convinced I am of Mark's perspective, but I do think it's interesting that there is, that there have been a dad, Mishael and Hananiah. Those are their God given, the names given by their Jewish parents that give praise to God. And I do think it's good as we remember the story to know their real names. But in the Bible and in the story, they're referred to as Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego. So we will refer to them as that. And here's the situation. Last week, we talked about the exile and basically Jewish slaves being carried to Babylon to serve in their court and that they took some of the elite, the cream of the crop, young men, and they installed them in the government. They put them through a training process and then they installed them in the government and gave them different roles. And so Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego have been prepared for that, and they've now been installed in their roles, and they've reached the upper echelons of government. And as such, they've made their peers jealous of them. So there are native Babylonians that are now working with them or even under them that have become jealous of their progress and of their success. And that's the environment. And in the midst of this environment, there's an edict that goes out. King Nebuchadnezzar erects a gold statue of himself. And there's an edict that whenever music is played, and in the Bible, this is where in Daniel chapter three, I'm going to look at some verses in a minute. So if you have a Bible and you want to turn there, that's where we are. But it says in the Bible that whenever these instruments, the lyre and the harp and the whatever, and the trumpet and whatever are played, then you should bow and worship the golden image or just bow towards the golden image and worship Nebuchadnezzar, who has now deified himself. And Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego don't agree to this. Whenever the music plays, they don't worship. And I was thinking about this as I was rereading the story and reacquainting myself with it. It's difficult to believe that they would stand in the city center obstinately going like this and saying, we're not going to worship. It's more easy to believe that they would discreetly and respectfully move off to the side and just kind of let everyone else do their thing. I certainly don't know what the situation was, but I seriously doubt they made a big show of not worshiping. I think they just didn't worship. But some of their peers noticed this and told on them. They went to King Nebuchadnezzar and they ratted them out. They told on them. And this is a lesson for all the, everybody, if you're in here and you're under 15, raise your hand. Snitches get stitches. All right. That's a real thing. Don't do this. Don't tell on people. That's for you. They told on them. And they said, hey, whenever the music plays, these people aren't worshiping you. They're not honoring you. And the text says that Nebuchadnezzar was enraged. He was an emotionally volatile man from everything we can tell from the text. Nebuchadnezzar was enraged, and he calls them in. And he's furious at them. And he says, I've heard you guys. I've brought you in. I've supported you. I've trained you. I've elevated you. I've progressed you. I've given you success. I've given you affluence. And as a thank you, you refuse to worship me. He's furious at them. He says, if you don't worship me, I'm going to play the music. I'm going to turn on Spotify. And if you don't worship me, I'm going to burn you in the fiery furnace. That's the threat. So that's the situation and that's where we are. And this is their response to King Nebuchadnezzar. And I think it is a remarkable response. Daniel chapter three, verses 16 through 18. Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego replied to him, King Nebuchadnezzar, we do not need to defend ourselves before you in this matter. If we. That's the most important phrase in the story. But even if he does not, we want you to know, your majesty, that we will not serve your gods or worship the image of gold you have set up. So he brings these young men before him. He's this enraged king surrounded by guards. And he says, if you don't worship me, I'm going to throw you into the furnace. I'm going to burn you alive. And their response is, we do not need to defend ourselves against you in this matter, which is difficult to parse out. And different theologians would say different things, because with this limited story we get from the text, it's difficult to know exactly what their intent is. And so this is a guess. But my guess is that they believe that Nebuchadnezzar knew of their faith. That they believe that he knew, like, hey, we're worshipers of the Hebrew God. We're not worshipers of other gods. We don't need to defend ourselves against you. I don't think it was defiant. I don't think it was, no, no, no, I'm not going to talk about that with you. You don't deserve that. I'm not going to answer that question. It was, it was more of, I believe, you know who we are. You know who we worship. That's not going to change. And that God that we worship is going to protect us. Throw us in there. He'll protect us. And even if he doesn't, we're going to continue to believe in him. And we will not worship you. That's their response. When they responded in that way, Nebuchadnezzar is so angry that he looks at his guards and he says, make the furnace seven times hotter, which is a hilarious command. Because if you're on fire, you're on fire. You know, does it get worse if it's seven times? Like if your arms on fire and then you make it seven times hotter, is that a worse fire on your arm? Like I don't understand that. And I also don't understand in ancient Babylon how you gauge what seven times hotter is. But that's what he says. Make it seven times hotter. And it was so hot that one of the guards that bound them and threw them into the furnace burned up himself because he got too close to the flame, which is a really tough way to go. But that's what happens. And he throws them into the flame. And then he's watching them in the flames, expecting to see them burn up. I don't know if there was like a bulletproof, like double-pane glass that was heatproof that he could see through, or if it was just like an open furnace. I don't know how it worked, but he's looking in and he's seeing them, and he notices something. And this is what the text says, Daniel 3, 24 through 26. Then King Nebuchadnezzar leapt to his feet in amazement and asked his advisors, weren't there three men that were tied up and threw into the fire? They replied, certainly, your majesty. He said, look, I see four men walking around in the fire, unbound and unharmed, and the fourth looks like a son of the gods. Nebuchadnezzar then approached the opening of the blazing furnace there three people in the house, but only are there three people who are unharmed, but there's a fourth. And the text just says he looks like a son of the gods. And here's a thing that I like to do with the Old Testament. We don't know who that was. We don't know who the fourth person was in there with them. It could have been an angel. Some people think it could have been Jesus himself. And here's what I do as a highly trained theologian. Whenever... Shut up. That's great. I'm a very lowly train. I'm not a pastor, theologian. That's crazy. Anyways, just the snicker from the 26 year old was deserved. It was deserved. Whenever we have the opportunity in the Old Testament to put Jesus in a place, we should. So maybe it was an angel. But I think it was Jesus. I think he showed up with Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego. And he said, I'm with you. You have faith in me. I'm with you. And he protects them from the fiery furnace. You can extrapolate that out however you like. But I think Jesus was there. I think Jesus was there in the form of Melchizedek when Abraham showed up in Salem and gave a tithe to him. For me, it's just cooler to allow Jesus to show up wherever it seems like he does. So who knows who is there? And who knows who wrote Hebrews? But let's make guesses. And I think that was Jesus there in the furnace with them. When Nebuchadnezzar sees this, he calls them out. Come out right away. And the ties that bound their hands were done. They were burned up, but they were unharmed completely by the flames. And his response, if weadrach, Meshach, and Abednego, who sent his angel and rescued his servants. They trusted in him and defied the king's command and were willing to give up their lives rather than serve or worship any god except their own god. Therefore, this is important, I decree that the people of any nation or language who say anything against the God of them must be cut to pieces and their houses be turned into piles of rub is, if you honor God, you will get a promotion. He sees what happens. Also, that's false. He sees what happens and he calls them out. And he says, he gives praise to this God that he was moments ago committed to defying. Do you see? And so that's the story. And then God gets the glory. So that's the story of, and that's all the rhyming I'm going to do. That's the story of Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego and the fiery furnace. And it's a wonderful story. And typically, when I preach a sermon, I'm really, whether you've noticed it or not, doing my best to try to get us to like one point to think about. I'm trying to drive the ship to this one thing for us to consider. And I'd love to do that with this story, but here's the problem. It's too grand of a story to reduce to one point. I've also been your pastor now for eight years, and this is the first time I've preached on it. I don't see myself getting back to it anytime soon. So instead of just saying one thing, I want to pull out three things from this story that we learned for us to consider this morning. And I would encourage you to weigh them with equal weight and to decide and determine this morning. We don't have the capacity to apply three things to ourselves and do three new things in our lives and all the things. So one of these three things, I think and I hope and I and I pray will connect with you. And I would invite you to just grab onto the one that does. And maybe you'll get to the end of them and be like, is there a fourth one? I don't, none of those mattered, but hopefully one of these three will be something that relates to you. So the first thing we see in this story is simply this. Holiness matters. Holiness matters. It matters in life. It matters to God. It should matter to you. Holiness matters. Last week, this is what we talked about. We talked about Daniel being trained by the Babylonians and being offered this new diet. And with this diet, he was encouraged to eat stuff that was outside the purview of the Jewish laws in which he grew up. And so he said, I'm going to refuse that and choose this vegetarian vegan diet. And let's just see how it goes. So he chose holiness. And when I say holiness, here's what I mean, because this is what the Bible means. The word holy means different and more accurately, it means other. So when we say holy, and when God said, when we say about God, holy, holy, holy, what we are saying is different, different, different, other than us, set aside from us, not the same as us. And so when we say we act with holiness, we pursue holiness, what we're saying is we're pursuing being different. And what we talked about last week is we're pursuing being different from the society in which we find ourselves entrenched. We are not citizens of the United States. We are not citizens of North Carolina. We find ourselves residing here. We are aliens in those places, and we are citizens of heaven. And so our behavior and our standards should be not in line with the given standards of North Carolina or Raleigh or North Raleigh or wherever it is you find yourself. Our standards for ourselves should be in line with what scripture says and who God tells us to be. That's what holiness is. Now, I had lunch with a friend of mine this week. And, excuse me, and he he was saying how does a leaf get up on this stage like all the way in looky there I had lunch with a friend of mine and he was saying that he enjoyed last week's sermon but that he wanted when I got I got to the holy part, to the diet, he wanted to say, what's the diet? Give me the standards. Tell me what to do. He's like, I don't know how everybody feels, but sometimes I like to get kicked in the teeth on Sunday morning. Like, make me feel a little bit bad. Like, ruffle my feathers a little bit and tell me what the standards should be. Tell me what we should watch and what we shouldn't watch. And tell me what we should think and what we shouldn't think. And tell me what practices in my life, like get on to me a little bit. And I said, I'll never do that. I'll never do that. That's not what I'm here to do. Because holiness, this is going to sound odd, is gray. It's different things for different people. I'm never going to get up here and tell you what it looks like to be holy as if I am that. You guys are smart, responsible adults with the gift of the Holy Spirit. Most of you. I believe in your capacity to decide what holiness is for you. I'm not going to sit up here and list standards off by which you should live. I'm going to trust you to establish those for yourself. And here's one of the reasons. I've given this example before. Years ago, I found myself, and I still do, as a big fan of NBA playoff basketball. I hate the regular season. I think the mid-season tournament is one of the dumbest things I've ever encountered in my life. That joke's going to land with 5% of you, but you know who you are. But I would watch the NBA playoffs because I like it. I like sports. I watch all the sports. And I like the playoffs. But the playoffs would keep me up because of the West Coast games until 1, 1.30, 2 o'clock in the morning. And by watching them every night, I was getting up later than I needed to. And sometimes it would cause me to either miss my quiet time, which you've heard me say a hundred times. The most important habit anyone can develop in their life is to wake up every day and spend time in God's word and time in his presence through prayer. You've heard me say that over a hundred times, if you've been here for any length of time and by staying up late and watching those games, it was causing me to wake up late and either have a truncated quiet time or none at all. And so it was impacting me spiritually. So it became unholy for me to stay up watching basketball games. But I'm not going to stand on this stage and tell you it's unholy to watch sports. That's how it's great. You have to determine how your behaviors impact you and how they push you to God or not and what diet is right for you. But here's what I know based on this story of Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego, is that holiness matters. Here's the second thing I know from this story. God is always working for his glory. God is always working for his glory. You see in the story that they get into this scenario where they've been told on. It's a bad scene. And they could have justified their way out of it, couldn't they? They could have said, God, I'm going to bow down to Nebuchadnezzar so I don't die. And so that I can remain in this place and influence in the right way. I mean, if I die, they're just going to replace me with a godless Babylonian. You don't want that to happen. So like, I'm just going to do this. I don't mean it, but I'm going to bow down. They didn't do that. They were in a tough spot. And they had this standard because they chose holiness of I can't bow down to Nebuchadnezzar. And at any point, God could have intervened and saved them. But he waited until the very last minute to save them in the fiery furnace. And so they were in this predicament that was preventable, but God didn't prevent. He allowed his servants to continue to suffer. And what we see at the end of that is that God was working for his glory because what's the result of the story? The result of the story is Nebuchadnezzar declares, no one will ever blaspheme the God of the Hebrew people. No one will ever blaspheme the God of Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego. And by allowing them to go through this difficult phase and rescuing them at the very last minute, God made his own name great. Do you see? It was declared throughout Babylon because of that. There's an edict that went out that we will honor this God now. So it's important for us to hear from the story that whatever God is doing, he's doing it to work his own glory. I have a friend who, when he graduated, he got in with an accounting firm. And he began to just work and work diligently and work hard and do what you do in that stage of your career and kind of rise in the ranks and yada, yada, yada. And he ended up making partner with two other folks. And so now he's a partner with two other people, but he feels a sense of injustice because they don't work as hard as he does. They have this kind of mentality that once you make partner, now you have employees to do the work and you get to make the money off of what they do. And he felt like, no, you have to outwork your employees. And then he looked at his partners who he viewed as lazy and they are not working as hard. And this frustrated him and it caused years of frustration. And then eventually what happened was, and he's, by the way, going to church, he's a deacon at his church. He's, he's one of these people and he's getting frustrated with the situation because it feels unjust and it feels unfair. And he's like, God, I'm honoring you. Why are you, why is this happening? And then there's a personal fallout and he actually gets kicked out of the partnership and he has to start from scratch. And so he finds himself in his mid-30s with children starting from scratch and going, God, how is this happening? Why is this happening? This seems unfair. But he starts from scratch and he builds a new company and develops new partners. And you fast forward another 15, 20 years after that, and his firm exists and gives 20 to 30% of their profits to nonprofit organizations building God's kingdom around the globe. And he has people on his payroll whose entire job is to do the finances of nonprofits for free. He had to go through a hard time and be recalibrated. But it was to be recalibrated for God's glory. So that this person could be, so that my friend could be used to bring glory to God in his kingdom in a greater way. Some of us in here may find ourselves going through times that seem hard and seem preventable. God, if you wanted to fix this, you could. God, if you wanted to rescue, you could. God, if you wanted to restore, you could. If you wanted to repair, you could. If you wanted to heal, you could. And maybe he's not. But God doesn't work in days. He works in decades. And he works in centuries. And here's what I know about God based on this story and many others. God is always working for his glory. And he will involve you. In that path. If you stick with him. Like Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego. So God is always working for his glory. Here's the last thing. And this one. I said consider them with equal weight. But this is my favorite one. And I stole this one from a friend of mine who I hadn't talked to in years. And I actually called him this week and I said, Hey dude, he's a guy, his name's Alan Smith. He's on staff at my last church. He's still there as a campus pastor. And he and I worked together. And I remember him preaching this sermon. This was the first sermon that he preached. It was on Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego when he had a chance to preach at the last church. And I called him this week and I said, dude, I'm preaching that story. And I remember the point you made. And I'm totally stealing it. But I'm going to give you credit. Like just so you know, I'm not going to pretend like this is my idea and my insight. and we had a good catch up and whatever. But this is not from me. This is from Alan. Not that Alan. This is from another Alan. Here's the question that I come out of with this story. And this is the thing I want to leave you with. Do you have, even if, faith? Do you have, even if, faith? I told you those words were the most important words in the story, and I told you that we were going to come back to them. Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego said, Nebuchadnezzar, O king, if you throw us in the furnace, our God will protect us. But even if he doesn't, we will still worship him. Do you ever see the power of that? I believe my God can heal my dad. But even if he doesn't, I'm going to worship him. I believe my God can repair this. But even if he doesn't, I'm going to worship him. I believe that my God can make this better. But even if he chooses not to, but even if he doesn't, I will remain faithful. Do you know how hard it is? Many of you have walked through it, and you know what even if faith is. Do you know how hard it is to feel let down by God and say, but even if he lets me down and he doesn't do the thing that I think he's going to do or that I want him to do or that I need him to do or that I'm desperate for him to do or that I'm weeping for him to do, even if he doesn't do it, I will still choose him. That's even if faith. I had a conversation this last week and it made my week, man. I used to be a high school teacher. And Honeymoon is a football coach, Mike Devine. And I got really close with a particular class. And there were some of the kids, some of the guys that I got really close with. So close that I'll tell you this. One of my greatest regrets, this guy's name's Alex Williams, and we went to the lake. I took them to my in-law's lake house. And we were joking about getting tattoos, and I don't have any tattoos. We were joking about getting tattoos, and Alex said, I'll get a matching one with you. And I said, what do you want to get? And we decided that it would be great to get 100% awesome written on our butt cheek. I wish I had that tattoo. Golly, what a miss. That would be great. But I don't. But Alex and I were that kind of close. And in his junior and senior year, Alex's dad was dying of cancer. And I have a vivid memory of bringing in some of the other men and dads from the class into my classroom. And we gathered around Ron. And we prayed for God to heal him. And God did heal him. He just healed him in eternity. He didn't heal him here. And so Alex lost his dad. After losing his dad, his mom, understandably so, kind of went off the rails. And his two elementary age brothers had to move in with Alex at 19 years old. And he found himself as the caretaker for them. He had a hard go. And Alex always loved Jesus, but this was a hard season. And I lost touch with him for a while. I would see him on Facebook. He's got a wife. He's got a young family. He seems to be doing well and be thriving. And I got a Facebook message, which I don't check very often because it was two weeks old. But he reached out to me and he said, hey, I'm doing okay in life. And I want to give to people who need it. How do I do that? And so I said, this is a great conversation to have, dude. Let's talk. And we talked and he said, and this is, you guys will find this funny. Um, and it's sad that it's true. He said, you're the fourth pastor I've talked to. I'm involved in the church. I've talked to three other pastors. Can you guess where they told me to give my money? And he said, I knew you wouldn't do that, so I called you. And I said, 10% of everything we give goes to you. We had a great conversation. We caught up. We shared stories about the time I got too excited as a football coach and punched him in the stomach in the middle of a game. Not because I was mad, because I was pumped up. I was like, let's go get him. And I accidentally hit Alex. Anyways, it was a wonderful conversation. And he's coming to Raleigh. He's doing a bid on our church. He's a general contractor. He might build our church. Who knows if that's what God is orchestrating. But he's going to come here, and when he comes here, I'm going to lay out in front of him six nonprofits that I know of and say, whatever God directs your heart, get involved in these. But these are good people and they're doing good things. And I'm so thrilled to be able to do that. But here's the point of that story. That's even if faith. Isn't it? Even if you don't heal my dad. Even if my mom goes off the rails. Even if I adopt my brothers at the age of 19. Even if I have to go through trials and I can't go to college. I will find a way, and when I do, God, I'm going to honor you. As soon as you give me the means, I'm going to honor you. That's even if faith. So that's the question that I would leave you with today. Do you have even if faith? Let's pray and we'll take communion. Father, thank you so much for this morning. Thank you for this wonderful church and group of people. Thank you for the way that you allow us to love you and one another. Thank you for speaking to us through the stories of the Old Testament and this morning, hopefully, through the story of Ben-Hadad, Mishael, and Hananiah. Thank you for your servants then and your servants now. God, as we move into this time of communion, we just pray that we would reflect and be grateful for the way that you love us, for the way that you're always working for your glory. I pray that we would pursue holiness and that we would, if we don't have it now, progress towards an even-if faith. It's in your Son's name we pray these things. Amen.

All right. Well, good morning, everyone. My name is Nate. I get to be one of the pastors here. Thank you for joining us on this October Sunday. If you're joining us online, Alan Morgan is working the camera. He's an expert at it. So you're in for a great experience this morning. Thank you for joining us in that way. This morning, we get to wrap up our series, Gentle and Lowly, where we've been going kind of through the book by a pastor named Dane Ortlund called Gentle and Lowly. I hope that it has been a good experience for you. I hope that you exit this series more desirous of Jesus than you were when it started. The whole idea has been to acquaint us with Jesus and to acquaint us with our Savior and his heart for us. And so it's very appropriate that we would wrap up the series this morning talking about God's unfailing, unending, unyielding, unwavering love for us. A few weeks ago, Erin Winston, who I affectionately refer to as Winnie the Boo, and I would invite you all to call her that. She loves that name and has never asked me not to call her that, especially publicly. She preached and did a great job. And she talked about God's yearning for us, how he yearns deeply for us with a love that we cannot comprehend. And I had small group after that and talked with my small group after that. And, you know, we were trying to process this idea of God's love for us and why it's so difficult for us to simply accept that God loves us. And so as we close this morning, that's where I want to land the plane in gentle and lowly is talking about God's love for us in this chapter. I believe it's 19 in the book. He loves us to the end. He loves us forever. He loves us unyieldingly. And I think, and this is where I want to sink into this morning, we have a hard time as people processing the type of love that God offers us. Because in our lives, as we interact with others, as we have loving relationships, excuse me, as we have loving relationships, we enter into and out of love. And there's things that we learn about love and about relationships in our life that operate counterintuitive to how we experience God, because his love is unique. What he offers us is different than anything we've ever experienced in life. And so to get us on the same page, as we approach this thought process about God's love, I want us to understand how we experience human love in our lives, right? So one of the principles that we understand in our life about love is because it has to be earned, it can be lost, right? Isn't that our experience? Because love has to be earned, it can be lost. Very few of us experience anything in our lives that's unearned love. I'm married. I don't know if you guys knew that about me, but I am. And next year in July will be 20 years for Jen and I. Right. I'm old. Like I can't even, I'm in a young couple small group that I'll talk about here in a minute. I'm just young couples adjacent. I just have young kids, but I'm old now. We will have been married for 20 years. And here's the reality about us and about you if you're married. Love at first sight's not a thing. Hollywood made that up. That doesn't happen to anyone. If it happened to you, you got duped, okay? You thought it was love at first sight. It wasn't. And they didn't love you back, all right? And you just stumbled into that. Good for you. I'm happy that you're experienced. That's not a real thing. You earn it over time, right? We show up and we're consistent. And over time, we deserve that love. We reciprocate that love. I have a really good friend in my life, a guy named Trip. And I would say unabashedly that Trip and I love each other very much. We care about each other a lot. We talk every week. Sometimes Jen will tell me, if you'd quit talking to Trip so much, you could write more sermons. So we talk a lot and we check in on each other's marriages and I know everything about him and he knows everything about me and we care about each other deeply. And this is beside the point, but I hesitate to say this publicly, but I think I've got a book in me and I want to write about friendship, about adult male friendship, because men are bad at being friends and we need better friends and we need to be better friends. This is something to me that cuts very deep. I love my friends. I treasure them. They're some of the greatest privileges in my life. But here's what I know. I have this friendship with Tripp because I've shown up over the years. Because when he calls, I answer. When you call during the afternoon, voicemail. Voicemail. We'll just see. How important is this to Emil really? Let's see if he's willing to text me about it before I just stop what I'm doing. When my buddy calls, 3 o'clock, I'm going to answer because that's not usual. What's going on? Is everything okay? There are those people in our life that we love that much that we show up for them. But here's my point. That love is earned over time, showing up for them, answering the phone, being there. And here's what I know. If I stopped doing that, if I went absent on my friendships, if I stopped answering the phone and I stopped participating and I stopped engaging, it might take months or years, but eventually I would lose that friend. Because our experience in life is that love is earned over time, over consistency, over showing up, right? And if you stop showing up, what happens to that love and that friendship and that affection? It fades as our attendance does. So here's what we know about love in our life and our human experience. Because it has to be earned, it can also be lost. I had someone explain to me years ago this idea that when we're in a relationship with someone, there are boundaries around their love. They love you within these boundaries. And here's how I know this is true. I wouldn't ascribe to you a love for me, okay? I'm not saying that you're here this morning because you love Nate, but some of you have some sort of affection for me and you trust me as your pastor, but you do that within boundaries, right? If I show up next week and I preach about politics, now I'm outside your boundaries. You don't have that affection for me anymore. Yeah, right. So there's boundaries that I have to stay in to continue to earn your affection. This is true in all of our lives. In our marriages, there are boundaries. I love you unendingly. But if you adopt these behaviors, those are outside the bounds of love. In friendship, I love you. But if you go outside the bounds of love, that's done. And so that's how we understand what love is and what relationships are. First of all, it's earned. Second of all, if it can be earned, it can be lost. And if that's true, once love is lost, it must be regained. We have to earn it back, right? We have to rebuild trust. We have to rebuild love. We have to rebuild the relationship. And here's the other thing that we know about this. Regaining love takes longer than establishing it. Rebuilding trust takes longer than it did to establish it in the first place. I don't know how long it took me to convince Jen to fall in love with me. It's probably a couple of days. I mean, I imagine I was pretty cool at Toccoa, you know, like I imagine it's pretty quick. But if I did something to break her trust, it would take me longer to reestablish that trust with her than it did to get her to fall in love with me in the first place. I've heard from therapists that it takes an average of two years for a spouse who has cheated and broken trust to regain trust with their spouse. So in a marriage, which we would describe as the most loving environment possible for us outside of a parent and child, it takes on average two years to regain trust once it's broken. So what we know and what we experience about love in our lives is it takes longer to regain it than it did to establish it in the first place. You follow? So here's what we do and here's why I make these points. And I think these three points are important. If I have to earn love, then I can lose it. If I lose it, I have to regain it. And if I'm going to regain it, I have to engage myself in a long, slow process of rebuilding trust that takes longer than it did to establish this love in the first place. This is our experience with human relationships. But God's love flies in the face of that. God's love does not operate that way, which is why we have such a hard time processing and receiving it. So to those principles, let me show you what God's love says. So first we start, I must have to earn it. Nope. 1 John 4, 19. I have a lot of notes and I also have my favorite point that I've ever made in a sermon here at the end. You'll know when I get there. I won't have to point it out to you. No, we don't have to earn it. We love because he first loved us. 1 John 4, 19. Last week, I talked about the love that I experienced when my children were born. And they were laid on the chest of my wife. And I looked at that greasy space alien and loved them with my whole heart immediately. This is how God loves us. And here's what's tricky about this. We have parents. And if you have good parents, they love you no matter what. I have great parents. They love me no matter what. But there's been times when they've been disappointed in me. There's been times when I've stressed that love. There's been times when I've wondered about that love. Have I pushed it too far? And so even if we have wonderful parents who love us very much, we still don't have an experience in this life to equivocate God's love for us, which is an unyielding, unbuilding, unwavering love for us. We are still loved like a newborn baby placed on our mother's chest. We love God because he first loved us. What that means is before you were born, God loved you. As you were introduced into the world, God has loved you. As you've meandered your way through life and stubbed your toe and sinned and rejected him, God has loved you. As you've embraced him, God has loved you. As you've wondered, God has loved you. As you've clung to him, God has loved you. In such a way that's unwavering and unchanging. There is nothing you can do to be more loved by God than you are right now. There's nothing you can do to be more loved by God than you were yesterday. There's nothing you can do to be more loved by God tomorrow. Because he loves you and we reciprocate that by loving him back because he first loved us. So this idea that love has to be earned, which is our human experience, is not true of God. We do not earn it. We do not deserve it. He just does. And so then we take the next step. I can lose this love like I've lost others. Nope. John 13 one, because I can lose other loves because if I go absentee on my buddy trip, because if I operate outside the bounds of love within my marriage, I can lose that too. Because I can operate outside the bounds of what you guys prescribed for me as your pastor, I can lose that affection. Because I can lose love in my life, it must be true that I can lose God's love. Because that's how love operates. No. John 13, 1, on which this entire chapter is based. It was just before the Passover festival. Jesus knew that the hour had come for him to leave this world and go to the Father. Having loved his own who were in the world, listen, he loved them to the end. That's the sentence on which this entire chapter is based. He loved them to the end. He loved them forever. He loved them despite everything. Do you understand there are no boundaries on God's love for you? There's no behavior in which you can engage that would stop him from loving you. There's no dark night of the soul that would cause him to withdraw his affection for you. This is how Jesus loves. He loves us to the end. So this human experience that we have where love has to be earned and then it can be lost. And when it's lost, it has to be regained. That's not true of God. That's not how he operates. He's not waiting for you to qualify for his love again. He just loves you. He loves you with no bounds. This idea for me really hits home when we think about the boundaries around the love in our life. You love me as long as I stay within these borders. As long as I don't make those mistakes. As long as I don't disappoint you in this way. You love me. And this is true of all of our relationships. Because it's not unfair to draw those borders. We can't love a spouse who consistently betrays our trust. Who consistently hurts themselves and harms the family. We can't love a spouse that puts our children in danger. We can't love a spouse that betrays us consistently. So we have to have those borders for self-protection, right? God doesn't have any borders. He's willing to be hurt by your rebellion over and over and over and over again and still love you boundlessly. So even though our experience in life is once I earn love, I can lose it. Not with God. We can't lose that love. And then here's the other thing we do because we think we can lose that love is we assume that we have to earn it back. I must now, because I've acted in a way that God would reject and I've disappointed him, he must have withdrawn his love from me. So surely, like every other relationship in my life, I have to re-earn it. I must now slowly earn it back. Nope. Luke 15, 20. The prodigal son. This is a wildly amazing story that we wax over far too easily. For those not familiar with the prodigal son, or maybe you can't tell it off the top of your head. I'll go fast. There's a young man. His dad's very rich. And he goes to his dad and he says, I'd rather have your money than your presence. So can you go ahead and give me my inheritance so that I can enjoy it now while I'm young and I can leave this place? It's a very disrespectful request. And the dad, in his love and graciousness, says, yeah, sure, here. Gives him his inheritance. And he goes off into the city and he spins it on exactly what you think he spins it on. Indulgences of any kind you can imagine. And he comes to the end of his rope. He has no money left. And he's laying in a pigsty and he remembers how his dad's servants are treated. And I love this part of the story. He conjures up within himself a speech. He's going to go back to his dad, but he's going to re-earn his dad's love. And he's going to admit to his dad, I don't deserve to be your son anymore, but if I could just be a servant, I would be happy because they're treated better than I am now. Can I just be your servant? I don't need to be reconstituted to love. I don't need to be restored. I don't deserve that. I've broken your trust and you couldn't possibly give that to me. Can I just be your servant? It's a speech he prepares. And then he gets up the next day and he goes. And as he's approaching his father, this is what happens. Look at the verse. So he got up and went to his father. But while he was still a long way off, his father saw him and was filled with compassion for him. He ran to his son. He threw his arms around him and he kissed him. The dad that had every right to accept that speech. Yeah, you're right. You don't deserve to be my son. Yeah, you're right. Like maybe you can be my servant. We'll see. I'll put you in the charge of so-and-so and let's see how it goes. Isn't that our human experience with love? Don't we agree with the son that he needed to earn his way back? That's not what the father did. He ran. He threw his arms around him. He demanded no apology. He demanded no repentance. He demanded no reconstitution. Instantly threw his arms around his son and kissed him and gave him a robe and gave him slippers and threw a party for him. Instantly. And that's a picture of how our God loves us, but because of our human experience with love, we refuse to accept it. We can't comprehend it. That that's not a story about some guy that lived thousands of years ago. That's a story about you. And every time you go to the Father, it's a story about how he receives you. But because of our experience with love, we can't comprehend it. And we kind of treat embracing love from God like my children treat getting into the pool. I have one child who's very hesitant to get into the pool. Toe in. Maybe that's good. Then they hold the rail. Then they're up to their ankles. And I'm at the bottom of the stairs, annoyed. Come on. Get in. I'm in. It's fine. You have a higher tolerance for this than I do. Let's go. And then they're just inch by inch. Right? I've got another child who at the Lifetime Pool back when we were rich and I had a fancy gym membership. I don't have that anymore. When I were members at the Y. They would jump in before I was ready. Like I would be, this is the edge of the pool. I'm over here just being in the pool. And I look over and they're just jumping off the ledge. And I would dive under the water. This happened multiple times. I dive under the water and look at them under the water where they can't breathe and their mouth is open. And they're smiling, laughing. This is fun. And it's like, do you not understand? You're, if I don't, you're going to die. Like if I don't dive in and get you, this is the end of your life. You only get to be three years old. That's it. And I picked them up and they're laughing. Some of us re-engage with God's love like a child that's scared of cold water. And we assume that we just have to tow our way into it and gradually walk back in. When God's love actually invites us to jump in before he's even ready. Because here's the thing, and this is why that illustration resonates with me. Dad's in the pool either way. You want to tow your way back in? You don't have to, but he's right there saying, come on, I got you. You want to jump in two feet? You want to dive in? Dad's in the pool. Come on. I got you. You can jump in. God's love for us is different than any other relationship we've ever experienced. It's so different and it so blows us away that what I would assert to you this morning, and this is one of my favorite points I've ever gotten to make, is that God's love is a Brazilian steakhouse. Write it down. And there it is. I sent the notes off to Carly, and I said, because Carly's doing the notes this week because Gibby's not here, and she was like, please make them short. And I sent them to her, and I said, they're neither short nor uncomplicated. I'm very sorry. And she goes, I don't care. I just want to know what this Brazilian steakhouse thing is. At my last church, periodically, when we would achieve certain goals, we would do celebratory lunches at this restaurant called Fogo do Chão. Raise your hand if you've been to Fogo do Chão. You're my friends. You're my friends. Fogo do Chão is the most magical place on earth. Nothing will ever exist that's better than Fogo do Chão. It's a Brazilian steakhouse. Brazilian steakhouses do this. I've actually gone to Brazil to work with an orphanage, not to go to a steakhouse. But as an ancillary benefit, I did go to a steakhouse. And they're replete throughout Brazil. This is how they work. And at Fogo, you have this thing that looks like a coaster. And on one side, it's red. And on one side, it's green. And when it's green, listen to me, they just bring you meat. Just more of it. And they don't stop. I don't know if you're comprehending what I'm saying right now, but it's unbelievable. And the first time I went, I had this coaster and I was like, do you mean if I just go like this? They just keep bringing me the meat. And they're like, yes, sir, we will keep bringing you the meat. And do you know what they did? They kept bringing me the meat. And if you don't leave Fogo to chow with a headache and the meat sweats, you're doing it wrong. Don't go to the salad bar. Don't eat a single bite of cheese or a vegetable at all. Just sit down with bread and your green card. I went with somebody one time who licked it and stuck it on his head. Just green. And he made such a display of himself that the waiters were taking notice of what happened there. And at the end, he had eaten so much that the waitress said, Sir, I don't think you could possibly be interested in a dessert, could you? And his response to her was, ma'am, do I look like a quitter to you? One of the best lines ever. But I just remember going to Fogo de Chão, and I couldn't believe, I love steak, and I couldn't believe that they just keep bringing me filet mignon or picante or top sirloin or whatever. They just keep, it just keeps coming. Would you serve? There's skewers that they carry. Sir, would you like some of this? Yes, I would. Thank you. It seems like you're out of space on a plate. Bring me another plate. Just keep serving the meat. I couldn't believe that this was a real place. Here's my point. God's love is so extravagant and so counterintuitive to anything else that we've experienced in life that I believe we have a hard time comprehending and appreciating it. In every other experience in life, I go to a steakhouse, I give you $55, you bring me a steak, that's the portion that I get, I'm done, that's the exchange. Not at FOGO. It's all that you want for as long as you want it. And that's our experience with God's love. In every other relationship in our life, for sometimes necessary reasons, there are boundaries around the love that we experience. There are limits on how many times we can be forgiven. There are expectations of our behavior to earn that love. And for the most part, rightly so. But God's love for us is so different and so unique that it defies every other experience of love that we have in our lives and is wholly overwhelming and is unfathomable. And if there's nothing else that we take away from this series, I want it to be this. God's love for you is unlimited. It is unyielding. It is unwavering. It is unrelenting. It is unstoppable. He loves you fiercely. So this morning, here's the invitation. His arms are open wide, inviting you to jump in. Let me ask you this. What would your life be like? Bless you. What would your life be like if you truly believed that God loved you? What would your life be like if you truly believed that the creator of the universe has an unbounded affection for you that you can never interrupt? What would it be like if you woke up tomorrow morning knowing that you were as loved and as affirmed as a son or daughter of the king as you ever were? What would it be like if you woke up tomorrow morning and you didn't need anyone else's affection? You didn't need anyone else's approval. You didn't need anyone else to tell you that you were good enough because you knew that you knew that you knew that God loves you, that he affirmed you, that he has purposed you, that he has destined you. That he has assigned you these children to love. That he has assigned you this wife or this husband to love. That he has assigned you this workplace to go to and to be a minister in. That he has assigned you these things and he did that because he loves you. And you don't have to go earn it. He just does. What would tomorrow morning be like if you woke up and jumped two feet in into the pool with your heavenly father who loves you deeply and unyieldingly? Let's pray. Father, please convince us of this. Please show us this. Please help us rest in the reality of your love. Please help us accept what is so counterintuitive to us. That we do not have to perform for you that we do not have to put on for you or execute for you that we can even disappoint you and your arms are still open you still run to greet us you still love uscely. Would we this morning as we leave and as we sing and as we go experience just a little tinge of that relentless love that you have for us? Help us to accept it, to appreciate it, to embrace it, and to live in the reality of your love. In Jesus' name, amen.

Well, good morning, Grace. My name is Erin, and I get the privilege of being one of the pastors here. And thank you for being here this morning, whether you're joining us online or whether you're here in person. We are just grateful that you chose to carve a little bit of your Sunday out to spend it with us. This morning, we are actually continuing in our series, as Mikey kind of reminded us, in Gentle and Lowly, where we've actually been looking at the character of Christ. We've looked at his compassion. We've looked at his humanity. We've looked at him as our gentle priest. And last week, we looked how he is our intercessor, as well as our advocate before the Father. And this week, we're going to jump ahead. We're now in chapter 18, and today we're actually looking at his yearning bowels. That one took a minute to sink in, didn't it? For those of you all that giggled and or wanted to laugh but chose not to, may that middle school boy that lives inside of you remain there forever because they bring such joy and interest to life. And for those of you that the yearning bowels may have brought up unfortunate thoughts of explosive bowels, I apologize on that front as well. And I hope that in this morning I can erase those visions from your head. And you can't blame me for today's topic. Nate holds that one firmly on his shoulders because he's the one that picked up the book and went through chapter by chapter and decided what he felt is what Grace needed to hear. So he's the one that chose that y'all needed to hear about yearning bowels today. But in actuality, if you dig into the chapter, what the chapter is about is about God's yearning love for us, about his tender and his compassionate heart that reaches in and grabs us in the depths of our sin and wants to pull us out. And as I read this and I continue to read over this, I have to admit, and I stand before you very transparent as one of the pastors and say, I struggle with this. And I struggle with what this says. I know it to be theologically the truth but I have moments when I look at it and say hmm there's a God that loves me down to the depths of his being to his core. He loves me that much and I struggle with And I ask sometimes, how is that truly possible? For those of you that know me, this next statement will not come as a shock, but I am a people pleaser by nature. And for as long as I can remember, I've sought the approval of others. It's just who I am. It is part of my wiring, I truly believe. If you go into all the personality tests and you look at all the things, like I'm a helper. I don't know all the numbers and letters. I just don't. But that's just who I am. That's how I'm wired. I also think environmentally there was an impact. My dad was in food retail. We moved a ton when I was a kid. I was in four different elementary schools before I hit fifth grade. So I spent a lot of time trying to fit in, trying to find new friends, trying not to be labeled as, you know, the new girl. That's not something I wanted to carry. I just wanted to fit in and be part of a group or like just a little cluster. The other thing is, is that I didn't in those elementary years have a foundation in God's love for me. I grew up with parents who were believers, but we were also a family that were Christers. For those of you that don't understand that terminology, we went to church on Christmas and Easter. That was my exposure to the church. Good or bad, again, that's just what it was. I also had a brother who played travel hockey, so we were always on the road. These were choices that my parents made, and I don't hold any of it against them by any means, but I think it helped to form who I am and how I continue to do. Because from childhood and even into adulthood, my world's been marked by a lot of striving. This striving to be accepted, this striving to prove myself, to somehow earn a place. And then after I became a Christian, that striving also fell into, I think, and shaped how I viewed God. I knew that I loved him. I knew I believed in who he is and who he says he was. I knew that what scripture said about him was 100% true, but I still doubted sometimes that he could love me the way that he said he did in scripture. Because y'all, I knew I'm messy, I'm stinky, I carry lots of baggage. I carry lots of shame, lots of regret for my past. And so for me to think about that kind of love hitting home for me is hard sometimes to wrap my head around. And so as I was continuing to prepare, Nate and I have met a few times. And again, this might be shocking to you all. He came to me a couple times and said, you have too many words. You need to parse it down just a little bit. But he challenged me to find one thing, just one thing that out of this chapter and out of what I've studied, that I would hope that you guys would walk away with. And so, Nate, I apologize ahead of time because in looking for my one thing, I may have veered off course from what we had talked about originally. So this is what we've got, though. But he challenged me to think about one thing for you all to walk out of here with today as we talk about God's love for us. And the thing that hit me somewhere in all of this was from John chapter 13, verses 34 and 35. And what that says is, a new commandment I give you, love one another as I have loved you, so you must love one another. And by this, everyone will know that you are my disciples if you love one another. Y'all, when I read that, when I went back to it and I read over it and I read over it again, and it hit me right in the face. How is it that we can love others if we don't believe that he loves us? He states in that commandment, he wants us to love others like he's loved us. But if I doubt or if I don't believe in the love that he's given me, how then in turn can I give that love out to others? And I think that's why our world today is starving. It's starving for the kind of love that Jesus offers to us. This love that's real. It's not a political correctness or tolerance. It's not a kind of love that is social niceties, but it's the kind of love that is rooted in stays, forgives, it heals. So when he says for us to love others the way he's loved us, he's not asking us to try to do better. I think what he's doing is he's inviting us to be transformed. Transformed by the love that he has for us first. Because see, we can't love others like Jesus until we trust that we're loved by Jesus. This is it. If you hear nothing else I say today, this is it. That we ourselves can't love like he asks us to love others until we trust that we're truly loved by him. And this love that he has for us and is asking us to give out to others, it's not a cautious love. It's not a distant love. But it's a love that is actually drawn into our need and our messy. Which that's the part that I think for a lot of us is scary, right? So when we're at those places down deep, and this is where I said before, I have messy, I have lots of background baggage, right? But that's the place that Jesus wants to meet us and dig in, in that place of sin and love us all the more. So in those places where we feel the most unworthy or the most unlovable, the most ashamed, he wants to meet us there. We have to learn how to wrap our heads around that. And I think that there's a lot of us in this room that may be like, yeah, well, he extends that to others around us. I've seen it. I've seen it. I've seen that love extended to other people, but he's not going to give that to me because, you know, not after what I've done, not after the fact that I have yelled at my children for the 10,000th time, not after I have attempted and yet failed one more time to quit alcohol or drugs or pornography. Or after I have had the abuse that I have in my past. He can't love me there. He can't. And so instead of resting in his love, what we do when we put up that wall that says he can't get into those down, dark, dirty places with us is we start striving to earn love in other places. We have somehow to prove to others around us that we're lovable, that we're worthy of the love that he has or that somebody else has. I'm lovable. If I just keep doing, if I keep striving, if I keep somehow, somebody's going to think that I'm worthy. But when we doubt, when we doubt, when we strive, it doesn't do us any good. And in actuality, it makes us poor lovers of the people around us. He calls us to love others the way that he's loved us. But if we're striving to get that love from other people and from other places, then we are in a place where we have no capacity to give love if we're always striving to try to grab it from something. And when we doubt that we're loved, we tend to withhold our love from those around us. Because you know what? It took me an awful lot to feel this little bit of love that I've got right now. I'm not ready to give that up. And so we hold on and we're not doing a good job in loving other people. And so when you look at how Christ loved, we go back to where he was when he gave this commandment. He's in the upper room. It's the night before he's to go to the cross. The night before he makes the sacrifice of his life where he takes on your sin, my sin, your neighbor's sin, past, present, and future. So that we can have a relationship with him and that we can in turn be with him forever. So it's the night before he's getting ready to do that for us. He's sitting in a room with his 12 best friends and he knows already that Judas is about to betray him. He knows that Peter will deny him and he knows that by the time that the sun rises, all of the disciples will have scattered. He knows that. And yet he makes a very conscious choice to kneel down and to wash their feet. Y'all, if that was me and my humanness, that would not have been my response. Think about it. I might've been angry. I could have been, you know, or like, like, just not going to talk about this. You're going to be hateful, ugly people to me here in about 12 hours. I'm done with you. But that's not how he chooses to respond. He chooses with love and action. He chooses to serve when it is the least deserved. And he chooses to move towards those who are failing him. He knows it. And that's what he does for us too, right? He moves towards us in those places where he knows we're going to fail him, where we're not doing what we feel or what we should be doing. And then he continues on and he says to them, as I have loved you, so you must love one another. So he's just knelt down. He's just given them that love that they didn't deserve, that love that met them in this place of complete and total failure. And he says, have to receive it before you can give it because love starts with receiving before it becomes doing. We get that backward all the time in our humanness. We get that backward all the time. When we're not anchored in his love for us, all we end up doing is making ourselves exhausted making ourselves defensive and disappointed I said before that I am a people pleaser and one of the things that people pleasers do so beautifully is they put others before themselves quite often to your detriment. Many of you guys know that my parents passed away within 17 months of each other, and sandwiched in between there, there was lots of running back and forth to Pinehurst, lots of hospital visits, lots of taking on responsibility and helping my dad and aunt. There was a whole litany of things that I could add in there. In there also, I was trying to be a good wife. I was trying to be a good mom. I was trying to be a good pastor here at Grace. And I can stand before you and tell you I failed miserably at all of that during that period of time. It wasn't pretty. I was short with my family. I know I let people here down. I let my coworkers down. It wasn't pretty. And I know it. And I was constantly running. I had my kids later admit to me that there were things that they didn't tell me during that time because they didn't want to add anything else to my plate. And as a mama, for those of the other mamas in the room, you know that just breaks your heart to think that they just can't come to you. I just was not a good human at that moment or during this time. And I can also admit to the fact that I would get phone calls periodically from my dad after my mom had passed. And I remember seeing his name pop up on the screen and literally just staring at the phone and in moments dreading answering it. I love my dad to my core, but I knew to answer it there would be questions and he was very needy at those moments and I didn't have anything left to give. I was done. I was exhausted. I did answer it, by the way. But still, in that moment, there was always that thought and that hesitation as I looked at the screen because I was like, oh, no. And the thing is, I neglected myself, and I realize now that we can't, you can't pour out what you haven't first received. I was working from an empty cup, a very empty shell, because I was running myself absolutely ragged. And this goes back to the fact that we can't love like Jesus if we don't trust that we're loved by Jesus. If I'm not filled up by Jesus because I trust that he loves me, I am not loving others well. And I think that there's a lot of us in the world like this today. And I think that this emptiness or this constant striving and this constant motion trying to earn something, trying to pour ourselves out from empty cups is why the world can feel like it does sometimes, where we're living in this place where we're quick to divide and quick to assume things and slow to forgive. And we see that often sliding into the church as well because the church is made up of a lot of humans, right? And it slides into the church as well. You don't need me to tell you that. You all have seen it at some point in time. All you have to do is look online. And it makes you sad. And I think back to what Jesus said about his disciples loving others. And I wonder to us too, if we classify our followers, ourselves as followers of Jesus, what would it be like if the people of Jesus were known not for being right or righteous or all the things you could add there, but for being rooted. Being so secure in his love that we freely give out our love to others. That we are so rooted in his love that we no longer compete, but we serve, that we're so rooted in his love that we no longer compare ourselves to others, but we celebrate each other, and that somehow when we're so rooted that we no longer condemn, but we just choose to forgive and to offer grace. Because I think then the world will start to take notice. And the world's going to recognize us as Jesus followers by our love for one another. Our love, this love that is so rooted deep inside of us, is meant to be living evidence of who he is. It's meant to be that living evidence to the rest of the world that he is real and he is love. Not our striving love, not our performing love. That's not the kind of love that we need here. What we need here is that secure love, the love that is flowing from a heart that is rooted and anchored in grace. And I know some of you all are now looking at me going, okay, that sounds really good. And you've not met my mother-in-law or my father-in-law or whoever it may be, my coworker, my brother, my sister, whoever it may be that says, and you're going, but loving like Jesus is going to be really hard in those circumstances. Yeah, it is because we're human and we run out of patience and we run out of kindness and we run out of, in a lot of cases, just run out of ourselves. But I go back to that commandment that he gave us. And I don't think he gave it to us to be impossible. I think he gave it to us as a reminder and an invitation to draw us back to him and to remind us that that same love that he gives and that same love that saved us is now going to be the love that empowers us to love others. And that that love and that grace that he met us with in the middle of our messy, stinky mess is now going to be the love and grace that helps us to meet others in their mess. It's an invitation and a reminder that even with those that are super hard to love, we can't work it up sometimes. We can't just walk into the situation going, I'm going to love them better today. I am. I'm going to love them better today. It doesn't always work that way because our ability to love doesn't come from some sort of willpower. I truly believe that it comes from being willing to be loved. I had the opportunity last week to hang out with some sorority sisters. We did this the year before. It's just a sweet time. We get to reconnect. This year, my old roommate got to join us, and I was so excited. I had not seen her in probably seven or eight years. And Shelly and I got to actually room together again on this trip, and we spent many nights just chatting and talking and catching up. And I asked her about her sister and how things were going. Shelly had a sister who about 15 years ago had a brain tumor, multiple surgeries, etc. Left her sister with basically some traumatic brain injury. She had short-term memory issues. Long-term memory was very much intact. Her physical ability is very much intact. So she could live somewhat independently. It was always nice just to have some people around to check on her. And about seven years ago, she moved up to be close to Shelly and her family. Lived a couple houses away, so very involved in her life, constantly looking after, checking in on her, and all the things. In 2022, her sister caught COVID, and because of her compromised health, landed her in the hospital for a great deal of time. It accelerated some of her decline. And because of that, she ended up in a rehab facility. And Shelly's comment in all of this to me was, I don't understand why it's her and it's not me. There was a lot of guilt in that respect. And, you know, we talked about it, and she's a believer as well. And I'm like, I don't have an answer for you on that one. There isn't an answer for why it's her and not you. And then she went on to say that one of the things recently that Amy has started to do is that every time they go to visit, Amy just looks at her and says, God has been so good to me. And it's at every visit. And Shelly looked at me and she said, I don't know how she can say that. After 15 years and all she's gone through and all the struggles and all the things, I don't know sometimes how she can say that. But this time I knew I could look at Shelly right in the face and go, I know exactly why she says that. Because of you. You are her personal representative of God's love. You who shows up and loves on her unconditionally. You who takes her out. You who does all the things for her and with her. To her, you represent God's love. So when she says, God has been so good to me, she can say it because of the way that you love her. And I hope, Grace, that we can be that to other people as well. Nate often states that we can't be the big C church, but we can be Grace. And we as individual people can impact, we can work on ourselves, we can impact our families, we can also then impact this body and the communities around us. And so when you think about Shelly and you think about her willingness to love so unconditionally the way she did. I think about us and myself. This is me talking to myself too. But what would it be like if we chose to believe the best about one another because we know that that's what love does? What would it be like if we showed up for people who were hurting? Even when we didn't want to because their hurting is hard. But we did it because we know that that's what Jesus would do. What would it look like if we were forgiving before it's earned? Because we know that that's what grace would do. And what would it be like if we had all the patience with those that are just new or learning? Because again, we know what grace and love would do. Because I think every act of love then becomes this small reflection of the greater love that we've received. Because we can only do that, however, when we're sure of his love for us. And when we're secure in his love, we stop striving to earn it and we start living to spread it. And so today, I don't believe in my being that this is an invitation for us to walk out these doors and try to love better. I don't think that that's what this is. I think what this is is an invitation to us to let ourselves be loved deeper. To receive his love for us. All that Aaron and the team sang about. How much he loves us. That's what we have to receive first. And when we truly trust that we're loved by him. Freely, fully, without any condition. That will be the moment that we will turn and love others like he loves us. So we can't love others like Jesus until we trust that we're loved by Jesus. And so what is it, Grace, that you guys can do this week as you walk out these doors to root yourself deeper in the love that he has for you today? And will y'all pray with me? Thank you. Thank you, Lord, that you love us. Thank you, Lord, that you give so freely of your love. We just ask that we are willing to receive that, that we put down ourselves, that we quit striving to earn our love from someplace else and quit striving to earn your love. But somehow, by staying rooted in you, that we learn how very deeply you love us. That down deep in our core and our soul, that you love us that down deep in our core and our soul that you love us that much and by doing so challenging us to then take that love and spread it to those around us thank you Lord for your love thank for your son. And it's in your name we pray. Amen.