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What do you do when youre constantly reminded of the one moment you would like to forget the most? What can we learn from Peter so our most regretful memories dont shape our tomorrow?
Transcript
Good morning. How are you guys doing today? Good. If you're new, if you're visiting, my name is Aaron. I'm the worship pastor out here. And I don't know why, just to let you in on a little secret and give you a chance to laugh at me, whatever. I don't know why, whenever Nate's up here consistently and I come up here, one of my first instincts is to say, I'm not Nate. Like, you guys didn't know that. Like, for some reason, you thought, man, what happened to Nate over there? He just got a lot better looking suddenly. And I mean, maybe, maybe, but hey, really glad to be here. Nate, thanks so much, man, for the opportunity to come up and share what's been on my heart. To kind of launch us in, get our minds going in the direction that we're headed today. Have you noticed how the mistakes that we make speak so much louder to us than the right things that we do? To kind of give you an idea, so several years ago, my wife and I, we went to Miami, and I had been on this venture and this journey for a long time, trying to learn Spanish, trying to just get better at it. And I was doing the Rosetta Stone thing, all of that. I was doing really good. I could say, like, going to Mexico in October with the mission trip, I would have been perfectly fine asking where the bathroom was. I'm just good. I wouldn't know where they were telling me to go, but I could ask where it was, right? So I was halfway there. But I remember we went to Miami. And if you've never been, it's a culture that's largely influenced by the Latin culture, the Cuban culture down there. And so just the places that we went, I got to speak a lot of the Spanish that I knew, like restaurants and stuff, right? That was good. But when we got back, I was just, I was kind of feeling, like I was having a lot of confidence and I wanted to impress my wife, who is the love of my life. And so we were out one day and I was hungry and she was hungry. I was like, you know what? I know how to say I want to go to Five Guys. That was before the burgers cost 45 bucks. And so I was like, so I want to look at her with all the confidence that I could muster. I looked at her dead in the eyes and I said, quiero cinco hombres, right? Sounds good, right? But if you speak Spanish, you know what I said to my wife was not I want to go to Five Guys. What I said to my wife was, I want five men. And it was not what I meant to say to her because I did not want five men. I wanted to go get an overpriced bacon cheeseburger, right? And you know what I did after that? I did not say Spanish words that I did not understand until, what's funny is this true story. I tried it again last week. But let me encourage you. If you're trying to learn Spanish, don't use the words that you hear on video games because you could end up saying not good words in front of your grandma-in-law who does know very good Spanish. And she looks at you like, did you mean to say that? And I don't know. I just heard like she was getting shot at. And then I repeated what she said and it was whatever. But what's really funny about this, right? Like that, it struck me this week how vivid that memory was. And it's funny. We laugh about it. We can do whatever. Like it wasn't that big of a deal, but it really struck me how big of a mistake or how the mistake stuck with me all of these years. Isn't that true for all of us? We have these goals. We have these things and these places that we try to get to in life. And isn't it true that the failure en route to that goal, it seems to keep coming back over and over and over. It seems to play on repeat. And this isn't just a Christian thing, it's a human thing. But if you're a Christian, it's not just the goals that you have, is it? It's also who Christ has asked you to become. And so on the other side of those shortcomings, on the other side of those mistakes, man, it seems like that's an easy thing to point to. It's when the voice of shame starts to speak pretty loudly on repeat. I know what you did. You think they're going to accept you at church if they find that out? In this series, we're talking about emotions. Emotions that can overwhelm and emotions that can kind of take control and move you into being something you've never really wanted to be. And what I would argue is that a lot of the emotions that we're talking about, they're not to be demonized. Like the emotions that we experience aren't bad things. Like anger, for example. Anger left unchecked will completely wreck havoc in your life. But without anger, you would also not have passion. You would not be moved to act. Yesterday, we went to a lot of people at Grace Serves. We went to Rise Against Hunger. Without anger causing someone to be passionate about world hunger, they would not have that ministry. Fear, fear, unchecked, it will immobilize you. But it's also caused people to create a lot of safety in our world that we never would have seen otherwise. So a lot of these emotions are not bad, but shame, shame has no place in our world. I truly believe that shame is one of the most often used and effective tools of our spiritual enemy, consistently pointing at where we fell short. And the reason why shame is so powerful in our life is because shame not only points to your mistakes, but it identifies you by them. Like you are the sum total of the things that you have done wrong, and it plays on repeat. And so what's heartbreaking about this is our lives are often wrapped around, our identity is often wrapped around that one season in life, that one mistake, that one thing that you did or that one thing that was done to you. And we try as hard as we can, except we just can't forget it. That's what I want to talk about today. Because here's what we have learned. You can't quiet that voice. So how do you keep it from being so overwhelming? And if we're going to look at the life of anyone who has messed up time and time and time again, who else could it be except for Peter? Some of you thought I was going to say me, and that's not nice. Stop it. Right? But we're going to look at Peter. And to catch you up with where we are in the story, we're going to be in Matthew. But to catch you up with where we are, we're actually just within a few hours of what Nate talked about last week with Jesus in the garden. It started in the upper room with the Last Supper where Jesus is Jesus is predicting actually Peter's denial. Jesus says to Peter, hey, Pete, you know, listen, in a few hours, like you, actually, he says, all of you are going to abandon, turn your back and going to leave me. And Pete says, no, no, not me. Not me. I'd never do this. Well, Peter, funny, I love you. But it's not very smart to argue with the guy who can read your mind. But yes, you will do. This is something you're going to do. They move forward. They go into the garden, and Jesus simply asks them, hey, let's just stay awake and pray with me for a little bit. Jesus goes off to pray. It's probably interrupted by Peter snoring, and he comes back, and Peter's asleep. It does that twice. Then they move forward. Jesus is arrested. The guards come. Peter chops off the ear. Jesus puts it back on his head, so there's another correction. And then they go to the court. And that's where we're going to pick it up. In Matthew 26, we are met with this scene. Now, Peter was sitting outside in the courtyard. A servant girl approached him and said, you were with Jesus the Galilean too. He denied it in front of everyone. I don't know what you're talking about. Now, when Peter, when it says that Peter cursed with an oath, that's not the same kind of cursing that we do when somebody cuts us off in traffic, right? This was more along the lines of, may God strike me dead if I'm lying. That was how firm Peter was in saying, I don't know this man. And so he broke. The account of Luke actually tells us that Jesus and Peter made eye contact. And it was at that moment that he broke. And here's one of the reasons why I think that shame is such a powerful tool is because it's so easily mixed up with conviction, right? Like both shame and conviction point immediately at the thing that you don't want to see. The thing that you don't, it points at the mistake. And both make you feel bad about it. And so as a Christian, how do you discern the difference? Like which one is shame? I don't know what to do. And you end up just kind of stuck in the same spot. But the best way that I can come up with to describe the difference is this. Shame disqualifies, and conviction invites. Shame is always going to disqualify you from wherever it is that you're trying to go. Wherever it is that you're trying to accomplish, shame is going to look at you and say, you, you, you, you don't, you can't go there. Like, really? Like, you think that you can do that? But conviction is the opposite of a tool used by the enemy. It's the voice of the Holy Spirit in our life. And it's always inviting us to something. It's always inviting us to what's next. That's the difference. Shame points at our mistakes and shows us how we can never be anything other than that. While conviction points at our mistakes and says, hey, here's what's coming. This is where we go from here. This is what's next in our life. What's fascinating to me about this, like we just talked about where this scene began, there was three to four mistakes, probably about seven to eight if you include the three different times that Peter denied. This is at the end of the Gospels. This is at the end of the three-year window into Peter's mistakes. What has happened every single time? He's dropped the ball. This is what he's known for. He's the guy who messes up. He's the guy who puts his foot in his mouth, except he gets back up and he follows Jesus. He gets back up and goes where Jesus asks him to go over and over and over again, except for this time, it changes. We don't know exactly where Peter went after this moment. We don't know exactly what happened. But all four of the Gospels go to the next scene, which is Jesus' crucifixion. And at the scene of the cross, it lists several of the people who were there, most of which are some of the women who were following Jesus at that point in time. And the Gospel of John tells us that John was there as well. You know who wasn't mentioned? Peter. Like, we can't tell you exactly where Peter went, but with a pretty good amount of certainty, we can tell you where he wasn't. Probably the place that he wanted to be the most. The place with his best friend to support. I don't think Peter was merely flexing when he told Jesus, no, I won't deny you. But what we see is that shame disqualifies us from everything that Jesus invites us to do. Can we stop for a second? And like, it's easy to point a finger at Peter and say, yeah, Peter, you should have just went, man, you're forgiven, like all this other good stuff. But can I ask you, like, what is shame keeping you from that Jesus is inviting you to do? Where is Jesus inviting you in your life that you have convinced yourself that you don't deserve? Where in your life is it this accusation of shame that you could not lead your family towards Jesus? Why would they ever respect you? Who knows you better than them? Why? Do you really think you can go to church? Man, hypocrite. How dare you show your face there? Do you really want to try to have more spiritual disciplines in your life? Like, why are you faking it? That's not you. It's the voice of shame disqualifying you from where Jesus is inviting you. And here's what's true. In your life and in my life, we will never, we will never out-talk shame. I hate that. I remember when I was younger, there was a lady who told me that I had the gift of gab. What I really think she was saying is, Aaron, shut up a little bit, man. But here's what's true. You'll never out-talk and out-convince yourself of why shame is wrong. Do you know why? Because you're you. Like, who knows you better than you? As we try to move past this moment, what are you reminded of? Well, another one. For every one failure, we've got 40 others. And that's where our mind keeps going to, which is why I love what Jesus' response was. To all of this, Jesus shows up in the gospel of John chapter 21. Now, you have several of the disciples who have already went off. and I believe, and there's a lot of people who do believe, that what we're about to read is evidence that Peter went back to his old lifestyle. Peter went back to his old job. It doesn't mean that he is no longer caring for Jesus. He doesn't love Jesus anymore. It doesn't mean that even a little bit, but it just simply means maybe he felt like he couldn't do what Jesus is asking him to do. He couldn't be the person who Jesus was asking him to be, so he will sit into what he did before he knew Christ with a love for Christ. And then Jesus shows up on the beach. Jesus shows up while these guys are out there fishing. They go out fishing throughout the night, and they have been fishing all night. They haven't caught anything. Jesus shows up on the beach and says, hey, guys, you have any fish with you? And no, we haven't. And then we have, I skipped a slide. You can go ahead and jump to the verse, just so you can have the feel, and it says this. To become who Jesus, no, go back one, I'm sorry. What we're to do, let's start over. Let's roll the bumper. And so to become who Jesus says we can be, we must correct who shame says we are, right? Like that's the next point. I think it's at the bottom of your page, whatever. It'll be fine. So, but Jesus shows up on the beach, points at these guys and says, hey, listen, here's what's going on. What did he say? He said something. You guys messed me up so bad again. Where am I at, Nate? I'm just kidding. Don't do that. So Jesus shows up on the beach. These guys have no clue that it's him. They've been fishing all night, and Jesus asked them, hey, do you have any fish? He says, no. So he says, hey, throw your net on the other side of the boat. They throw the net down, and then there's so many fish, they could barely haul it in, and then something clicked. We don't know exactly what was going through Peter's mind, but we do know there was something different in this moment., he tied his outer clothing around him, for he had taken it off and he plunged into the sea. All right, so we can't breeze past all of that yet. Like we got to bring some attention to something because I love fishing. I do. I know a lot of you love fishing. I would love to go fishing with you unless you fish like Peter, which is no fish and in your underwear. Like that just, it's weird. Maybe if you catch fish, sure, I can get past the other thing, but just that's what's going on. Have no clue why it's in there, but John wrote it. So maybe he's just pointing out, look at this dummy, right? So who knows? But something happened in this moment. Something happened. This is the third time that Jesus has appeared to the disciples. And not once do you see this type of a reaction from Peter. So much so, he was so excited to see his Lord that he couldn't wait for the boat to go 100 yards to shore. He jumped out and swam just so he could get there. Peter remembered something. If this story sounds familiar to you, it had to to Peter as well. This is very similar to the very first invitation from Jesus to Peter, where he was sitting out in the water, very similar scene, all night fishing. Clearly, Peter's not very good at it. All night fishing, no fish. Jesus says, throw it on the other side. And they couldn't even bring in all the fish. So that happened and Peter remembered and it drew him to Christ. Some of you may know my story. Some of you don't. I grew up in the church. I wasn't a Christian at all. My father was a pastor. So really what that meant is I knew how to act like a good preacher's kid on Sunday morning, right? So I learned all the do's and all the don'ts. But the moment I had, the moment I had an opportunity to split and kind of leave the church was when I was 16. My parents divorced, and I took the path of least resistance. My entire family left the church and for the next several years of my life. It wasn't that I was ignoring God. I just didn't think of God. It wasn't a conscious decision saying, okay, I don't want anything to do with you. I was just living my life, doing my thing, doing what I wanted to do until I was about 19, 20 years old, had a car accident that should have killed me. And I remember whenever I went into the hospital, I was in the hospital for several weeks, had a shattered kneecap, a severed femur head in my left hip. If you're wondering why I walk with such a strut, that's the reason. But I remember while I was sitting at the hospital, the several years that I had spent just kind of doing my own thing, no consciousness of Jesus or God or anything along the lines of that, not one of the people that I knew hung out with anything, no one showed up. The people who did show up were the people from years and years ago. People that I went to church camp with, friends that I grew up in church with, some of my father's pastor friends, they showed up and they prayed with me. And this, I'm not saying anything about any of the people, but what that was is God reintroducing himself into my world. He began wooing me. And so I started this back and forth journey, right? Like this, this, this back and forth. Okay, God, I'll do the right thing. I'll do it, do it, do it, mess up. And then I kind of run off and then do my own thing again. I can't do that. Mess up, do it, do it, do it, run off, do my own thing again. And it was like this for a very long time because I reverted to what I knew. Like you have to be good enough. You have to be awesome enough. You have to be all of these other things. And then I remember I went to visit a lady named Carol McCraw, the same one who told me I talk a lot. She was a worship leader in our church growing up. And I went honestly, just simply to say hi. She was a very important person to our family. And I remember when I walked in and simply said hello. She saw, she was playing piano as the music was getting started, and she saw me. She got up, she ran, and just gave me a hug. And it was in that moment, it felt like God wrapped his arms around me, and there was nothing that I did. Now, I clearly wasn't carol, but God used her in a pretty big way because it was in that moment I surrendered my heart, and I could do, man, there was such a love for Jesus, and then I'm telling you, over the next several years, we can sit down and have some coffee or something at some point in time. But it's this journey of falling short. And it's these moments of shame floods my mind. And I consistently go back to this moment where all I did was walk into a place with no intention of seeing Jesus, simply to visit a friend. And it was in that moment, like I'm drawn to the compassion of God because of that personal experience. I'm drawn to the love of Christ in that moment because I realized I didn't deserve anything. Like I think about my past and I cringe, But the love of Christ accepted me for who I was and walked alongside of me. I believe that's what's happening in Peter's world right now. Maybe he went back to his old lifestyle. Who knows? Maybe they were hungry and they went fishing. But there was something in this moment that when he saw Jesus, he saw, oh wait, like something clicked and he remembered. He remembered the love that Jesus has for him. He remembered the last three years, not for the failures that he experienced, but for the Christ who picked him up, for the Christ who invited him into something different, for the Jesus, for the man who helped, who walked along the water with him, for the man who never gave up on him. And Peter saw, and he remembered, he didn't go to the beach, and he wasn't met with a stern rebuke. He wasn't met with some disappointed speech. He was met by his best friend who cooked breakfast for him. He got to hang out. Then he asked him the same question three times, right? He says, hey, Pete, do you love me? Yeah, yeah, yeah, Lord, I love you. Peter, do you love me? Yes, Lord, I love you. Feed my sheep. Hey, Peter, do you love me? Yes, you know I love you. Why are you asking me this? Like, Peter, because you need to remember. You were never, never with me because of how awesome you are. But I want to do something in and through you that will blow your mind. Then I have to believe that it popped back in Peter's mind when Jesus said, hey, I'm building a church and you are the rock on which I will build this church. Peter remembered not the failures that he had, but who Christ said he is. He didn't remember the mistakes that he's had. He remembered the promises of his Lord and Savior. Man, what is shame keeping you from that Jesus is inviting you to? How different would your world look if when the voice of shame started to creep up, you hushed it with the promises of God? How much more boldly and confidently could we walk into what Ephesians 3.20 tells us? That the same God who is working in you is working through you. How much more boldly could we run into that? If when shame said you don't deserve it, you say, I know. But in Christ, I am chosen. In Christ, I'm a child of God. Yeah, but they'll never accept you. They shouldn't. But in Christ, I am completely forgiven. You'll never change. In Christ, I am a new creation. I think that's why Peter told us in 2 Peter that you were chosen and dearly loved. What a shame robbing you from the joy of your salvation, the freedom in Christ. So at the bottom of the bulletin, there's one more blank, and we'll put it on the screen. It simply says this, I am blank in Christ. Now at the bottom of that, we've listed several things, but you can go through those on your own, or you can look throughout Scripture. But what I want you to answer is this. What do you need to know of the promise in Christ? Who do you need to remind yourself are? Who do you need to remind yourself that you are in Christ to hush the voice of shame in your life? Is it that you're new? Is it that you're forgiven? Is it that you're chosen and dearly loved? If you look through that and you don't see it, shoot me an email. I'd love to chat with you. I'd love to help you find whatever it is in your world that will quiet the voice of shame. But maybe put a piece of tape on that. Write it on a sticky. Put it on your dash. Put it on your whatever you need to. Wherever you need to put this so you can remind yourself not simply who you are, but who the Savior of the world says that you are. Who the God who created the heavens and the earth claims that you, his child, is. How different would your world look if we didn't settle with the accusations of shame? But we boldly corrected it with the promises of God. Let's pray. God, thank you. Thank you so much for your kindness. Thank you so much for your love. Thank you so much for your forgiveness that we do not deserve, Lord. As we go throughout our week, as we go throughout our life and inevitably fall short of what it is that you've asked from us, God, would you just send your Holy Spirit to remind us of your promises? Remind us of who you see us as. God, help us to find our identity in your love and in your grace and not our failures. We need you, Father, and we trust you. In Jesus' name, amen.

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