Grace Raleigh Logo
Sign In
The prayer of Psalm 139 is one of the most beautiful and intimate descriptions of God and His relationship to His people that can be found in all of scripture. As we are reminded, through this prayer, exactly how God sees His people and the depths of which He loves us it becomes much more frivolous to seek identity and worth through any other means.
Transcript
Good morning, everyone. My name is Kyle. I am the student pastor here at Grace, and I have the honor this morning of being able to close out our time in our series called Powerful Prayers, where we've been looking at different prayers throughout Scripture and waning and pulling out any meaning that we can find in those for ourself and for our life and for our faith. To make a really weird transition, I had this buddy back in the day. I'm not going to say when because I don't want people reading between the lines. It's before I was here, so none of you know. But I had this buddy who was like, I think, ascribing to be an influencer before an influencer existed, like a social media influencer, do we know these? He was so precise on his social media. Like, he didn't post, like, no caption or no tweet was posted until it had lived in, like, on his notes app for, like, two weeks to make sure it was good enough. He had times, like, he literally, he had, like, days and times. I think Sunday night, like, Sunday, like, midnight was kind of his time to post because that was when most people were at home on their computer doing homework and therefore probably scrolling Instagram, Facebook, Twitter. And so there would be the most possible, like it would optimize the amount of likes and comments and all of those things that he would get on his posts. He was very, very precise with those things, even including if his posts didn't do the numbers that he wished that they would have done, if he didn't get quite as many comments or quite as many likes as he would have liked, it bummed him out to the point that he would just delete the post because he's like, well, this is a worthless post, which is a pretty silly and funny thing. But ultimately, what we found is here is this guy who his mission was to create a version of himself that was the best possible version of himself that he could show to the people around him. And his value was placed in the response from other people to that life that he had sculpted and crafted. Now, I don't imagine many of you guys are that precise in these dealings, and so you're like, yeah, cool, whatever. Nice story, Kyle. But let me give you a couple other scenarios. See if they ring a bell, or even if they don't, see if something similar maybe sparks your interest. Your mom, and as your kids are growing up, you're starting to have more days than bad days. You're a dad, and you just can't really seem to figure out why your kids always matter, why you can't control your temper, or why your family can't just be a little bit easier. Your kids can't just be a little bit easier to manage. And you're starting to feel a bit of shame for it because I'm a mom, I'm a dad, it's my identity, that's who I am. And I feel like I'm not doing a good job. And then on top of that, you jump onto Instagram and and here's this other family who their kids have their shirts tucked in. I couldn't pay my kids enough money to tuck their shirts in. And as you see it, and as you see these posts of these families and these moms and these dads who seem to be doing it a lot better than you're doing it based on these pictures or based on small group and what you hear from the other parents in your small group or whatever it might be, you start to just feel shame. You're made to feel lesser than, normally by your own self. You're kind of inflicting shame on yourself because why am I not doing better? Why am I not being better? Or maybe you're looking at the people around in your circle, in your small group, like, gosh, man, they seem to be figuring out this work-life balance way better than I am because this is really difficult for me. It's really hard to navigate marriage while I navigate career. It's really hard watching people at my work who are doing better than I am and accomplishing more than I am and much more quickly moving up the ladder than I am. And this is what I do. This is who I am. And I'm clearly not good enough or not as good as the people around me. And so once again, you just feel shame. You feel less valuable or less valued because of your performance and what you see. Maybe people around you are starting to retire and you're like, what did they do? Why are they so much smarter and w than I am, and I still have to keep working? What's the deal here? Maybe you don't want to give up work because your entire identity is found in it. Who am I if I'm not doing this thing in my life? Here's one. Maybe something in your life has been marked by some sin and some shame in your life. Maybe it's something that was public. You did something wrong. You messed up. And the people around you know it. And you start to get more worried and more worried as you roll up to small group because you know, man, everybody knows. Everybody knows that I did this thing. And I know they can't see past that I've done this thing because I know that I can't see past that I've done this thing. Maybe you start walking around your friend groups and people are looking at you and giving you that gaze that you know, gosh, that is a judgmental gaze and I do not like it. Or they say snide comments because in their minds and in their brains, if they can belittle you, then they can raise and elevate their ego and puff themselves up a bit. Or what I think I see most of all, maybe it doesn't even matter what the people around you's reaction is because you are so crippled by the shame that is inside of you because of something that you do or something that you see that you are or things that are in your heart that you know shouldn't be there. And so it doesn't matter whether anybody shows any judgment towards you or is judgmental in any way because you've already decided you're not going to give yourself any grace and you're just going to walk in shame. And so you start to pull away and you start to disconnect, especially I got to stop going to small group. I can't measure myself up to these people because I just feel shameful and less than. I can't go to church. I can't sit around these people who love the Lord and have a Lord who loves them when I know that the contents of my heart are this or that I've done this and I cannot move past it and I cannot offer myself grace to get past this. That one is exactly what we find in the story of the woman at the well in John 4. The woman at the well is a pretty, like, it's a story that probably a lot of us have heard, but I think one of the difficulties of the woman at the well, or because her shortcomings and her sin are so specific that it's hard to actually find ourselves and place ourselves inside of the story. But ultimately, what we see and how we experience and come to understand why this woman is in the place that she's in is because she was dealing with a shame that was causing her to completely disconnect and to avoid any interaction with anyone. We find her at the well drawing water in the middle and the hottest part of the day by herself. This doesn't happen. Culturally, you don't go to get water in the middle of the day. First, because basically everything that they needed to do around the house and for themselves, they need the fresh water for that day. And so to go later in the day is to not be able to do all of those things up until that point. Second, you don't go in the hottest part of the day because it's the hottest part of the day. You know, like you have to carry those water, I don't know, the water carrying devices, vases, or I don't know what they what they... I don't know. Ashlyn made our wedding registry, so hopefully she knows the name of water-carrying devices and put them on there. I don't know. But nonetheless, vases or bowls or something that you have to carry. And then, I mean, as any of you guys know, as soon as you carry something full of liquid for any amount of time, it is very difficult, especially when it is very hot in the middle of the day. So why is this lady standing here in the middle of the day by herself doing something that every other person has already done in the morning? Culturally, we realize and we find out she's kind of hiding. She's avoiding any possible contact with the people around her because the people around her know her life. They know her sins and they know her shortcomings. And she doesn't want to deal with it. We find out what those are as she begins talking to Jesus. As she goes and he asks for water and as they begin talking, at some point he says, hey, go get your husband. I'd love to meet him. Knowing what he's doing and she says, I actually don't have a husband, I'm not married. And Jesus responds, I know you're not married. You've been married four times, and now this fifth man that you're living with, you're not married to. Essentially, reading between the lines, she has lived a life of promiscuity and adultery. And that unlocks why she's there in the middle of the day. To avoid any possible interaction with somebody who would give her that knowing gaze. Walking up to somebody who might treat her as lesser than because of her sin that she has lived in and is currently living in. Or maybe, maybe it's not even as much about what other people will do, but because she cannot offer herself and all she can think about as she's around anyone is comparing herself to the other people and it's just building up shame inside of her, and so she has just decided to eliminate all possibility of coming across anyone. But there was Jesus. As they talk, and as she kind of, why are you talking to me? I'm a woman. I'm not Jewish. Why are you a Jewish man, why would you talk to me? And his response is, man, if you knew who I was, you would ask me for a drink because I can give you water where you will never thirst again. I can give you a water that will satisfy your soul for eternity. There is no division. There's no Gentile and Jew soon enough. Because soon enough, a time is coming where everyone will be completely united under God's love, being able to be in unity, worshiping God together in his love. And I think she starts to realize who he is. And she says, sir, I've heard tell that there's a Christ who's coming. There's a Messiah who's coming, who's going to make all of this known to us. He's going to tell us how we get to experience this unity, how we get to experience unity under God. And he looks at her and he says, I'm him. I'm the guy. I'm the Messiah that you're talking about. It's an absolutely incredible story. She gets to be one of the first people on the earth to know that this is the Messiah who is coming to unite all people under God by his blood. But I tell you it not just because it's a great story, but because I think it connects really well to something that we find in our prayer that we find in Psalm 139. And that comes at the end of the story. The end of the story, as I read it, I both think, hey, this is great, and I also think, this is weird, and I don't get it. As a response to her recognizing, realizing, and understanding who Jesus is and her interactions with Jesus, she goes back into town and proclaims and exclaims to them. Now, remember, this is the lady who was off by herself getting water in the middle of the day, making sure that she had zero interactions with anyone who lives in her town and in her community because she didn't want to experience the shame of getting or having to experience anybody. But she met Jesus. And so she felt like she could go and talk to these people. That makes sense to me. And half of what she says makes sense to me. She says, could this really be the Messiah? But she doesn't pose the question. She doesn't pose the question because she doesn't go, you know what, guys, I was getting water over here. This dude asked if I wanted to give him a drink. And then he's like, actually, I got a drink for you that will quench your thirst forever. I have this guy who said that through him and by his power, that we are going to be united in God, all one people just glorifying and worshiping God. She doesn't say any of that. She says, while I was getting water, I met this guy who told me everything about my life. Could this be the Messiah? In the joy of exclamation, she brings up, I met this guy who knew everything about me. How does that make sense? Why would a person who is hiding from anybody who could possibly know anything about her life, how could she make a full 180 to now go and find all of those people and exclaim to them, I have met this guy and he knows every part of me. How awesome is this? This guy might be the Messiah. It doesn't make sense to me. And it connects, I think, really well to the beginning of Psalm 139, a prayer to David that also is insane to me and absolutely terrifying. You perceive my thoughts from afar. You discern my going out and my lying down. You are familiar with all my ways. Before a word is on my tongue, you, Lord, know it completely. You hem me in behind and before, and you lay your hand upon me. Such knowledge is too wonderful for me, too lofty for me to attain. All right, here's the gist. David is praying and considers it fully wonderful that God knows every single part of who he is. I don't know about you guys, but I don't want anyone to know that about me. I think if any of you knew what lied on the other side of the Kyle that I present to the world, I think you would like, no one would ever want to be around me again. There is a lot of ugly and a lot of imperfect that comes from that. And not only says that God knows every one of our actions, but he knows every one of our words that has yet to come on our lips. He knows every single thought that we've ever thought. What that means is when we decide that we're going to love on somebody or serve somebody, but it's for selfish ambition, he knows it's for selfish ambition and we're doing it for ourself. He knows that while I completely judge and I do not like this person, yet on the outside I'm going to love them and serve them however best I can, he knows how I really feel about that person in my heart. How can David consider it wonderful for a God who holds our life and our eternity in his hands? How can it be wonderful for that God to know us wholly and completely? Not only that, but verses 7 through 13 basically says, there is nowhere that I can run from you. I cannot hide from you anywhere. How can David find it wonderful? And how can the woman at the well exclaim and find joy in the fact that there is this man, Jesus, and there is this God who knows every single thought, intention, and action in our life? So we press on into David's prayer. And I think we in the secret place, when I was woven together in the depths of the earth. Your eyes saw my unformed body. All the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be. How precious to me are your thoughts, God. Verses 1 through 6, you find David pray about how wonderful it is that God would fully and completely know him. In 7 through 13, you find out that there's no place to hide from him, all of which are absolutely terrifying to me. But in 13 through 18 is where you find why it is wonderful. Because God knows this completely because he created us. I am fearfully and wonderfully made. What David is saying is that as God is your child, I have been made and created on purpose. Ephesians 2.10 says we are God's handiwork. Other translations say we are God's workmanship. We are his masterpiece created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand that we should walk in them. Every single one of us were created on purpose. There was intention in our creation. It wasn't random. God created you to be you. He created me to be me. He created us on purpose. He knows us completely. There's nowhere that we could go to hide. And he sent his son to experience the condemnation and the death for our sins that we deserve so that we get to experience an eternal relationship with him. All of that to say that not only as children of God, not only are we holy and completely known by God, but we are wholly and completely loved by God. To me, I see David's joy in a new light. I see complete clarity in the light of David as he declares it as wonderful to be fully known for good and for bad. I see the same in the woman at the well of why she might exclaim joyously that here is a man who knew every part of me. Tim Keller puts it this way. He says, But not be known is comforting but superficial. To be known and not loved is our biggest fear. But to be fully known and truly loved, that is what we need more than anything. That's why David was able to find peace knowing that every thought, every desire, and every action in his life, because he was a child of God, no longer, no longer shades God's view of him. Because he is fully loved and created and set apart by God, there's no longer condemnation. There's only love and there's only grace that he gets to experience. He gets to experience being fully known and being fully loved. When you look at the woman at the well. And probably for the first time in a long time, she was able to realize and experience the freedom that comes from not having to anymore be defined by or held back by her past or her present. Because all that mattered now was there's this man who not only talks of this eternity, not only talks of this unity under the Father, under God, but he is telling me, I think, that I get to be a part of it. Me, the person who has to hide from everyone because I cannot deal or bear with the amount of shame that I hold on to, this same woman who is living in utter and complete fear, completely and wholly crippled by shame, had to run down to town to the people she was avoiding, and she had to say, guys, there's this guy who knows all the things you guys know about me, and he, I think, I'm pretty sure, he is offering me the same love that he's offering all of us. Somehow, I get to be a part of this. What if us, as Christians, as children of God, lived in the freedom that she got to experience? Where we weren't always and completely crippled by the fear and anxiety and the shame that is brought on by comparing ourselves to the people around us all the time. What if we weren't defined by the accomplishments that we have or the things that we are trying to figure out? What if we weren't at all defined by anything except for people who are wholly known and wholly loved by God? Can you imagine that freedom? Can you imagine the way that you could treat people and experience life if you weren't held back by your fear and by your anxiety of how people see you or how you're presenting yourself? If you weren't consistently bringing shame upon yourself and couldn't get over the fact that you are the way that you are in certain ways, not realizing that God has forgiven that a long time ago and God created you exactly as he intended to create you? Tim Keller writes separately in a separate book, Jesus took the condemnation we deserve. He faced the trial that should be ours so that we do not have to face any more trials. So I simply need to ask God to accept me because of what the Lord Jesus has done. Jesus took on the condemnation and the trial for us. And so, in light of that, we read on. Listen. Listen. Then the only person whose opinion counts looks at me and he finds me more valuable than all the jewels in the earth. How can we worry about being snubbed now? How can we worry about being ignored now? How can we care that much about what we look like in the mirror now? To continue in my own words, why would we ever place our source of identity, value, or worth into the hands of anything outside of a perfect father's perfect love for us? Who do we think we are to not offer ourselves grace when Christ and God's eternal position in heaven, eternal posture in heaven, is to have grace and forgiveness for you? Who do we think we are that our grace should be more expensive than God's? Who do we think we are that we are not allowing ourselves and offering ourselves the grace that we have already freely been given through the blood of Christ? And when you look at the other people around you, when you look at a mom on social media, when you look at a dad who seems to really be able to just get it with their son, just really be able to play with their kids and connect and all this stuff and you're having a hard time, when you look at the accomplishments of someone else that's around you in your circle, at your work, in your small group, wherever you find yourself comparing your life to the life of another one in order to boost or deflate your ego, here's my question. What comparison can you make that compares to the knowledge that you have been fearfully and wonderfully made by a perfect creator? What comparison can you make to anyone else around you that compares to that knowledge? That you are both fully known and fully loved by the creator of the universe. And through the blood of Christ, you have been set apart for the joy of an eternal relationship with your creator, God. May we today, may we this week, strive to experience the freedom of the woman in the well, the freedom of David who prays and is thankful that a God fully knows him. Offering our self-grace, offering the people around us grace, and only looking at ourselves and the people around us in one light and one light only as people who are completely and wholly known by God and loved by God. And may that be our only distinction for ourselves. Let's pray. Lord, I don't know why it's so hard for us to give ourselves the grace and to find our identity in you, even though you've made it so accessible and so easy to do so. Lord, would you just please lighten up our hearts and allow us maybe for the first time to experience the freedom of having complete certainty in our identity, our worth, and our value in you. And look for it nowhere else. Lord, we love you so much. Amen.

© 2026 Grace Raleigh

Powered by Branchcast Logo