Doubt is a natural part of our experience of faith. Yet we often try to ignore it or shame it when really, we should explore it. The truth is, doubt is often a great sign of health, and Jesus, in His goodness, meets us there.
Transcript
All right, well, good morning. You already know my name is Nate. I got introduced earlier. Thank you for being here on Mother's Day. These two are laughing because I'm preaching directly to you for the whole service. Right there in the middle. Thanks for being here. I like Mother's Day. I love the celebration of Mother's Day. I'm genuinely sorry that we don't have enough seats for everyone. We don't normally dedicate 11 babies and their subsequent families. And I'm also sorry if you had issues parking. But if you did, you could always just be on time and then, you know, not a problem. Before I just launch into the sermon, it's important to me on Mother's Day to express this. Mother's Day is a good day, and you get to express your gratitude for your mom. And mamas deserve to be celebrated. They work harder than dads. They just do. And I hope that you have a good mom that you're able to celebrate today. And if you're married, I hope you're able to celebrate your wife who's a good mom. And so it should be a joyful day. But I also know, because I've experienced some, that Mother's Day sometimes comes with mixed emotions. Sometimes it's been pretty recent since we lost our mom, and so Mother's Day becomes difficult. Or maybe we didn't have a great mom, and so Mother's Day kind of induces envy or disappointment. Or maybe we want desperately to be a mom and we are not. And so Mother's Day causes us to want and to be sad. So what I want to do before I just launch into the sermon that has absolutely nothing to do with Mother's Day, I just want to pray for the good mamas in the room and in our lives, but also pray for those of us for whom Mother's Day is challenging. So pray with me, and then we'll get started. Father, we thank you for the good moms, for the ones that love well, that show up, that show us you, that nurtured us and cared for us. And we thank you for the opportunity to celebrate them. We thank you for the mamas in the room now. And I thank you, God, for the multiple generations in the room. And so we thank you for the good ones and the blessing that they are. God, I also just want to lift up those for whom today is challenging. For whatever reason that it might be challenging. Would they feel your presence? Would they feel your arms wrapped around them? Would they be comforted in the unique way that only you can do? I just lift them up to you, God. In Jesus' name, amen. All right, we are in a series. And when I said this has nothing to do with Mother's Day, I'm being serious. We're in a series called Frequently Asked Questions, FAQ. And we sussed it out to our small groups to generate some questions for us that we could address over a period of five or six weeks. And we've been moving through and kind of addressing some of those questions. Today, we got a lot of questions on doubt. We got a lot of questions around doubt. How much doubt is okay? When is it all right to doubt? What do I do with my doubt? How do I handle my doubt? Or I have these specific questions and I don't know the answers to them. And one of the reasons why I thought it might be appropriate to put it here today is because I'm not sure. I remember when I was 19 or 20 years old, I was part of a ministry called Young Life. And I grew up in church. Christianity is foundational to me. I have no memories that precede church. I was there every Sunday morning, every Sunday night, every Wednesday night. And if there was a weekend event, I was there too. So Christianity is a big part of my life. And so it made sense that in college, I would do the thing that good Christians do. Cause the environment that I grew up in was, um, if you're a good Christian, then become a, like go professional, be a really good one and be a minister, start getting paid for your Christianity. If you can't do that, get a good job in tithe. That was pretty much the idea. And I decided I was going to try to go pro. So I'm doing young life. And I remember having a conversation with the guy that led our team, a guy named Brian Krawczyk. I reached out to him one day and I said, hey, man, I really need to talk. And I went over to his little basement apartment. And I remember sitting there in tears saying, I'm not sure if I believe that God is real anymore. And he said, okay, you know, why are you thinking that? And I said, well, it started with my prayers because it feels like when I pray that my words are bouncing off the ceiling and back down to me and that they don't really mean anything. And it's just me talking to myself. And because I don't know if I believe that prayer actually works and because I don't know if my words are actually reaching the ears of some God somewhere, I don't know that I can believe in God anymore. And because I don't know if I can believe in God anymore, I don't know if I can continue to minister with you because it's inauthentic and doesn't make any sense. And I was kind of crying the whole time. And Brian responded to me rather ineloquently by saying, Nate, get a grip, dude. You believe in God. It's going to be okay. See you tomorrow night. That was pretty much it. I mean, that was along the short of it. But, you know, I was 19. Brian was 23. We weren't exactly swimming in wisdom. So that's fine at the time. But what I really remember from that conversation is how emotional I was about it. Because I had been a Christian my whole life. And I had had these doubts simmering in the back of my mind for longer than I realized. And when I finally expressed them and gave vent to them, I thought it meant that I was going to lose my faith. And I thought it meant that because I would lose my faith, I would lose my worldview, and it would shake the foundations of my very life. And so I was scared of it, but it got so urgent and so much that I felt like I was living duplicitously to not address it. So I had to. Because if you're a believer and you've been a believer for any length of time, you've orchestrated your life probably around the teachings found in here. And so when you start to have questions about this book, or you have questions about what's taught here, or about what someone tells you is taught here, those can become very scary things because we don't know what to do with it. Because if we question it, if we pull that thread too much, the whole thing could come unraveled. And if that's what's going to happen, then we don't want to deal with it. Or we could get judged, or we could get questioned, or we could feel like we're very confused. And so I'd be willing to bet, because since that day, when I was doing Young Life, I managed to stay professional. I managed to continue to get paid for being a Christian. It's been a long time now, over 20 years. I guess it's about 25 years. Jeepers, creepers. I've sat in a lot of circles. I've sat in circles with teenagers, with middle schoolers, with children, with adults, with pastors, with atheists. I've sat in a lot of circles and I've sat with people as they had the moment that I had and said, I don't know if I can believe anymore because of this or this or this. And so what I'd be willing to bet is that a vast majority of you in the room have experienced doubt in your life. You may be here and you're not a believer and you're like, yeah, that's all I've ever experienced. I get it. I get it. And for you, your doubt is easier because you're not tethered to faith. You're not tethered to Christianity. So it's not, it doesn't cause an emotional response to have it. You just have it. And that's fine. But for a believer, it's tethered to things. It's connected. It's all woven in. And so if we pull that thread, we worry that we may disappoint the people around us, that we may not know what to do with our world and with our faith. And so even though everybody in this room, at least I think, has experienced a season of doubt in their life or has questions that are yet unanswered, even though we've experienced that, I'm not sure that as a church we talk about how to handle it well. So that's what I want us to do this morning, is if we can agree, and I don't know if you do or you don't, but if we can agree that yes, I've walked through seasons of doubt in my life, or I'm currently right now experiencing profound doubt, and I have questions that go unanswered. Wonderful. Let's look at scripture and see what we should do with that doubt. By looking at the OG doubter of all doubters, Thomas. There's a guy named Doubting Thomas in the Bible. He's the captain of the doubt team. And so we're going to look at his doubt and we're going to look at how Jesus handles it more importantly. And then we're going to think about how that impacts how we should handle our doubt. John chapter 20, verses 24 through 29. Now Thomas, also known as Didymus, which pretty clear why I went by Thomas, one of the 12 was not with the disciples when Jesus came. So when Jesus came back, he had died, he'd been buried, he resurrected, he came back, he visited the disciples. For whatever reason, Thomas wasn't there. Probably working on a name change. So the other disciples told him, we have seen the Lord. But he said to them, unless I see the nail marks in his hands and put my finger where their nails were and put my hand into his side, I will not believe. A week later, his disciples were in the house again and Thomas was with them. Though the doors were locked, Jesus came and stood among them and said, peace be with you. Then he said to Thomas, put your finger here. See my hands? Reach out your hand and put it in my side. Stop doubting and believe. Thomas said to him, My Lord and my God. Then Jesus told him, Because you have seen me, you have believed. Blessed are those who have not seen and yet have believed. So we see the story, and it's a famous story, and maybe you've heard it before. Most of you probably have. And because of that story, we assign him the moniker Doubting Thomas. That's how he's known. And we do that because it's a negative thing, because Jesus tells him, it's in the text, stop doubting and believe. It's almost like a command or instruction from God, stop doubting and believe. And so the way that we tend to handle doubt is we tend to say that it comes from a weak faith or a lack of understanding, or if you'd only like do the work or whatever it might be, but we feel bad about it. And we feel like if Jesus could talk to us about it, he might say, stop doubting and believe. And here's what makes it really, really tough is when we grow up in church and we see the adults that are leading us, or we look at the generation before us and we see how they live out their faith and they never seem to be the one asking the doubt questions. The children ask the doubt questions. High schoolers are free to do it. College sometime. And then by the time you get in men's group, you better, you better be buttoned up and know the answers and quit asking those questions. You dumb, dumb,, that's kind of how we treat it. And so we don't ask those questions. And we bottle them up. Because we think doubt isn't allowed. We think, as church people, that doubt isn't allowed. That'll be up there on the screen in just a second. We think doubt isn't allowed. That's your first blank, for those of you who do that. And we think it's not allowed because we think it's typically frowned upon, or that we'll be judged for it, or that we're scared of it, and we just need to put our head down and believe. But what I want you to see this morning is how Jesus meets your doubt, because I think there is this erroneous idea in the church that when we have doubts, we're supposed to just believe. Stop doubting and believe, Jesus says. And so the church has parroted that teaching through the centuries and said, just tuck that away and believe. But let me go back to verse 27 and show you what Jesus does to Thomas' doubt. Verse 27. Then he said to Thomas, put your finger here. See my hands? Reach out your hand and put it in my side. Stop doubting and believe. I don't know if you noticed this when I read it. I wouldn't have because when other people are reading scripture to me, I barely pay attention. So if you didn't get it, don't worry. Jesus shows up and Jesus knows that Thomas has not believed him. Jesus knows that Thomas didn't believe the disciples. The disciples told him about Jesus and he said, no,, not buying it, not yet. Now, here's what I'd like to say about that doubt, too. It's easy to think of Thomas as a skeptic and going, I'm not believing it until I can see it. No way. But this is, I'm guessing, okay? I'm guessing. You don't have to agree with me on anything, but you definitely don't have to agree with me on this, okay? I'm guessing at this, not in the text. I'm just guessing. I think it's more likely than not that Thomas' main motivation in that doubt was that he thought it was too good to be true and is trying to protect his heart. Thomas loved Jesus. He left everything in his life to follow him nomadically for three years, to basically live in poverty and on handouts for three years to follow this man around and learn from him. And Thomas was expecting that Jesus was going to become a king and he would be in his inner circle of influential people. So not only does he love Jesus, but he's hung his hat on the hope of a future with Jesus. And then he shows up and they say, hey, Jesus is risen. And he says, I'm not going to believe it until I can touch him. It just doesn't sound like to me that he was skeptical of the disciples and didn't trust them or didn't believe it was possible. I think it's most likely that there was something good motivating his doubt, which was probably that's too good to be true. And my heart can't handle it if it's not. So I'm going to hope that it is and wait until I see him. Now, that's a guess. Don't know. It's conjecture. But that makes sense to me. And so Jesus shows up and apparently he knows that Thomas doesn't believe him, doesn't believe the disciples. He knows that he doubts Jesus. And Jesus has every right to show up in the room and say, peace be with you. And then just stand back with his arms folded, waiting for Thomas to come check out what he needs to check out. He has every right to do that. He has every right to at least wait until Thomas comes to him and shakes his hand. That's not what he does. If you read the text, he walks in the room. He says, peace be with you. And then he walks over to Thomas and he says, hey man, here are my hands. Touch them if you need to. Here's my side. Touch that if you need to. Okay, you good? Do you get what you need? Okay, stop doubting and believe. Jesus met Thomas in his doubt. Jesus met Thomas in his doubt. And let me tell you something. If you are in a season of doubt, if you have doubted, if you have questions, Jesus will meet you there. He will not wait for you to come to him. He's not sending back arms folded, disappointing that you don't know the answers to some things and that is starting to really nag you. And there's different kinds of doubt. There's lingering doubt that just kind of there and you can kind of ignore it. And sometimes people talk about it, but eventually it becomes urgent doubt where you're me crying in someone's office going, I don't know if I can carry this faith anymore because I have these questions that have become so big that I can't ignore them. But in those questions and in those seasons, if Jesus goes to Thomas, walks in the room, hey everybody, Thomas, here. Don't you think he does that for us? Don't you think he meets us in our doubt? I don't think that we have to fear it being not allowed because I am convinced that Jesus meets us in our doubt. And what happened was Thomas was experiencing doubt. Then he had a personal encounter with Christ. And Jesus, as a result of offering him that encounter and meeting him there, says, okay, now stop doubting and believe. This also is a subtle way to communicate with us and to remind us that belief is a choice. Believing in anything is a choice. I believe the Canes are going to take the series in five. I do. That's a choice. And I'm putting my heart on the line. It might get broken. Not really. It wouldn't break my heart. I'd be like, oh, that's a bummer for Christmas Artorias. And then I'd move on with my day. All belief in anything is a choice. It's choosing to believe in Jesus, that he is who he says he is, did what he said he did, is going to do what he says he's going to do, and hanging the hat of our hopes for our future on him. It's exactly what Thomas did. I love you, and everything in my future is anchored on you. That's what belief is, is to say, I'm going to choose to love you, I'm going to choose to believe in you. And I'm going to choose to place my hope in you for my future. That's what it is to believe. And it is a choice. There will never be enough proof one way or the other to completely convince us one way or the other with absolute certainty. So all belief at any point is a choice. This is why in Romans 8, Paul says, let me get my thoughts together on it. He says, we hope, something like in this we hope. And he says, we hope, who hopes for what he sees? But if we hope for what we do not see, we wait for it with patience. So what he's saying is we hope in the redemption that Christ offers. And you don't have to hope in things that you can see. But since we're hoping for what we can't see, we wait for it with patience. And I've mentioned this a couple of times before. Do you realize that in eternity, in heaven with God, we have no more use for hope and faith? Those fade away with the world. We don't need hope in heaven. It's been answered. It's been satisfied. We don't need faith in heaven. He's right there. But on this side of eternity, we have to have faith and we have to have hope. And where we put it is a choice. And so Jesus is saying to Thomas, I've given you what you asked for. I've shown up for you. Now make the choice to believe in me and to be done with your doubt. But he doesn't ask him to do it until he shows up. Several years ago, I was in Honduras with a group of high school seniors. And after Bible study one night, one of the girls, a girl named Allison, came up to me and she said, hey, can we talk? And she had some doubts. She grew up like I did, Christian family, except she had some older siblings who had kind of, I wouldn't even say deconstructed or moved away from the faith. They just kind of disengaged, deprioritized it. And it was messing with her. And their reasons for doing so were messing with her. And she didn't really know how to handle it or what to do. And she asked some questions, and I was honest with her. I said, those are good questions, and I don't have good answers for you right now. I said, but here's what I hope for you. Here's what I hope for you. I hope that you can have a personal encounter with Christ. So tomorrow we're going to go to a village and we're going to be in the back of a truck and we're going to be handing out bags of rice to the women in that community. And I said, sometimes we see Jesus in his work. When we do his work, we meet him there. And the way it works is some dudes get in the back of the truck and they grab the bags and they hand them down. But there's people at the end who are sitting and they're the ones handing the rice to the Honduran women. And I said, when we go tomorrow, Allison, what I want you to do is I'm going to make sure that you get on the end of the truck. And I want you to look those women in the eyes as you serve them with the love of Christ. And I just, and I want you to pray that you have an encounter with Christ there, that you see him in their eyes. And she came back to me crying after the event. She says, I saw it. I saw it. I don't know what it is. I can't explain it, but Jesus showed up today. And that helps me. And see, these personal encounters with Christ, when he shows up in our life in a meaningful way, serve as anchors for our faith. So that when we do encounter things that we don't understand and we encounter questions that are hard to answer and we have lingering doubts that we've never approached and we just don't know what to do with it. But when we've had these irrefutable personal encounters with Christ, when he's shown up in our life in a meaningful way and we see his presence, we can anchor our faith there and it tethers us together between our doubts and makes it easier to hold our doubts. And here's the other thing I'll say real quick. Parents in the room, the better you handle your doubts, the more you have to offer your children in theirs. I think part of the reason that so many people have moved away, who grow up in the church, move away from the church, particularly in this era of what's called deconstruction, is because they start to experience doubts in college and early adulthood, and they go to their parents with questions, and their parents are like, yeah, I never figured that out either. And they're like, okay, well, then see ya. The better you handle yours now, the better you can help them with theirs then. But we don't do this. We tuck it away. And what I prayed for Allison that day is that like Thomas, she would have a personal encounter with Christ that would anchor her faith in such a way that Jesus could say to her, Allison, I've showed up for you. Do you believe me? Okay, well then stop doubting and believe. And stop doubting doesn't mean not having those questions. It just means being comfortable with holding them until we can get them answered. I'm reminded of the passage that I love that I remind you guys of sometimes in the gospels where Jesus tells the crowds, it was getting, Jesus had this way. Uh, he had this very intentional way of thinning the herd. Anytime his ministry got too big, he said something that self that sounded crazy. And half the people were like, okay, we'll see you later. And the craziest one he ever said is before he had died in resurrection and installed communion, he said, I tell you the truth, you cannot follow me unless you eat of my flesh and drink of my blood. And people like, yo, cannibalism's kind of, that's a line for me. Can't do it. And so a bunch of people left and Jesus looks at his disciples and he says, are you going to leave me too? And Peter says, one of my favorite things in the Bible, he says, you are the Christ, the son of God. Where are we going to go? Meaning, I don't understand what you just said. Or in our case, I don't have answers to all of my questions, but I know that you're Jesus. Where else can I go? But these personal encounters, when Jesus encounters us personally, it's only then that he says to us, now choose to believe and hold your doubts well, or stop doubting them or start letting them prohibit your belief. And I would say this too about doubt, as opposed to it being not allowed, I would say that doubts, often doubt is an indication of health. Very often these doubts that we carry is an indication of a healthy, more robust faith. It would be very problematic if your faith and your understanding of your faith was the exact same as it was at whatever point in your life you became saved. I shared last week that I got saved when I was four and a half because they scared me with hell. And I was like, I don't want to do that. And so then I got saved. If I still had that same understanding of my faith that brought me to salvation in the first place, that would be remarkably unthoughtful and unprogressive. We ought to mature in our faith and better understand our faith. And we ought to question and poke and prod our faith so that it can become ours and so that it can become something that we hold. Not something that we're mimicking from someone else, but something that we own because we've been satisfied intellectually and emotionally and spiritually with the robustness of this faith that we've progressed towards. And some of us grew up in traditions, Presbyterians, Baptists, Methodists, whatever. Some of us grew up in traditions and you've never been outside that tradition. And you just took all the answers that the pastors and the teachers gave you about all the things, and that's just what you've believed too. And I can't tell you, I can't speak for other pastors, I can speak for me. I am certain, I've been preaching for eight years, I am certain that in that time, I've taught you some wrong stuff. Probably this morning. Who knows? I'm certain I've made mistakes. I'm certain that I have said things that it would actually serve you better to disagree with than to just accept. And I would be deeply concerned for you and the way you think about your faith if you've been listening to me preach for eight years and you go, I've never had any questions. That would be remarkably unthoughtful, wouldn't it? Don't you think it's remarkably unthoughtful to grow up as a Baptist and just assume that they're right about everything all the time ever, even though there's like myriad other denominations that all seem to have some good ideas and some smart people too. Doubts and questions are more often than not an indication of a healthy faith, of a thoughtful and ultimately a more robust faith. Conversely, unexpressed doubt is a cancer. Unexpressed doubt is deeply unhealthy. Those questions that linger, that we never resolve, that we never give vent to because we're afraid of what the answers might be or because it's going to be hard or because it requires work or because people might look down on us or whatever it is. Those questions that we have about our faith that we don't answer, those are not healthy. Having doubt is healthy. It's indication of being thoughtful and serious about our faith. But unexpressed doubt that we just hold and we never deal with and we push down, that's a cancer in our faith that tears it down from the inside out. So if we are experiencing those, we have to find ways to express them. Two final encouragements for you about that. So let's say that we've moved through, we've experienced doubt, we can agree that that happens to us from time to time. We see the way that Jesus met Thomas and his doubt. We know that Jesus meets us there. Then after he meets us and we have a personal encounter with him, he says, okay, now choose to believe and no longer doubt. And then we go, okay, I want to do that, but I still need to exercise these things. What do I do? Well, here's the first thing I would encourage you with. The truth has nothing to fear from doubt. The truth has nothing to fear from doubt. There is this attitude in Christian circles, particularly conservative ones, that if we learn too much, we might walk away from our faith. That's stupid. Don't let your children read too many books. They might learn things that make this untrue. Okay, well, then it was never true. And why are you holding your kid back with that? I heard, this is true. I heard multiple times as I was getting educated in church. I went to a conservative Bible college, and then I went to seminary at a conservative place, and I heard multiple times, oh, so-and-so is going to Duke. Oh, Duke's, they're liberal. They're going to, a bunch of atheist professors over there, they're going to teach them the wrong stuff. That person's going to lose their faith. And there was this attitude of you had to stay in the conservative strand. You couldn't go learn more information about your faith from other perspectives because it's going to cause you to lose your faith. As if the truth has something to fear from doubt and new ideas. And what I'm here to tell you is God's truth and the reality of God and the saving work of Christ is not threatened by your doubt and it is not threatened by more truth. And if we can learn so much that this faith becomes not true, then it never was. And we ought to quit encouraging one another to bury our heads in the sand and just accept things sometimes because that's not a healthy faith. We can say, that's a hard question, I don't know what the answer to that is yet, but God showed up in my life in this way, and I am choosing to believe in him until he helps me resolve this. We can do that. And so when I say that truth has nothing to fear from doubt, it's also an encouragement to you to do the work. If you are someone who carries lingering doubt, if you have questions that have never been answered, if they bother you, do the work. Have the conversations. Ask people who have more Christian life experience than you if they've ever had these questions before. I promise you, you will relieve people by being honest with them about what you wonder about. This should be phenomenal discussion in small groups. It would be so good and rich in your small groups if somebody were brave enough to say, yeah, I've always wondered about this. I've never really known how to handle it. Like the ark. Is that real? Come on. That's a great question. Let's talk about that. We should be doing those things. So do the work. Have the conversations. Read the books. Listen to the podcasts. Go out and figure it out. And don't be scared of what's going to happen when you pull the thread of that doubt. Because I am confident because it's happened to me multiple times. There have been times when I have had questions that have lingered for years and I said, I have to explore these and figure them out because if I have to continue to maintain this teaching or this thing, I can no longer be a pastor because I cannot maintain that. And then in doing the work that I thought would lead me away from faith, what I found was a stronger faith because I had a more robust understanding of my faith. So if you have doubts, do the work. Don't be scared of what's there and don't be embarrassed by your questions. If anything, ha, how about this? Be embarrassed by your cowardice, sissy. Ask the question. The other thing that I want to encourage you to do in your doubts is to pray for what Jesus gave Thomas. Pray for what I've experienced multiple times in my life and what Allison experienced in Honduras. Ask Jesus to meet you in your doubt. Say, Jesus, I doubt. I don't understand. I can't quite get to belief or my belief is being challenged or eroded because I don't understand this, Jesus. Ask Jesus to meet you in your doubt. And I'm going to pray that he would meet you even this week and open your eyes and let you see him and go, okay, he just showed up. I'm going to use this to anchor me for a little while while I do the work that I need to do to answer the questions. But we need to remove the stigma from doubt as if it's a bad thing. We need to open it up. We need to see it as healthy. We need to do the work and have the conversations. And in doing so, we can, as a church, have a much more mature, genuine, sturdy, healthy, rich, full faith. Let's pray. Father, thank you for this morning. Thank you again for all the babies and all the families and all the friends and all the folks. Thank you for what you're doing at Grace. Thank you for the way that you're blessing us with these families. We pray earnestly, God, that we would be good stewards of them. Father, if there's anyone in the room who is experiencing doubt, who has questions, I pray that they would be brave enough to ask them. That they would be courageous enough to see them through and to let you meet them there. I pray that you would strengthen our faith through these doubts that we have sometimes, these questions that go unanswered. And God, for those of us that need you to meet us this week, I pray that you would. Would you just show up in profound ways that leave people dumbfounded at the way that you showed up and the reality of who you are? I thank you again for the mothers and pray that they would be celebrated well as we go through our days. In Jesus' name, amen.