Sermons tagged with Sovereignty

There is something so peaceful about lighting a candle, watching the flame flicker, move ever so slightly that seems to lull us into an almost meditative state. So different from the lack of peace we've experienced in our world, we come here caught up in the flow of traffic and Christmas shopping, our feet moving in the way of the world. It is exhausting. Add to that the barrage of chaos in the news or on social media that has us scared or worried, that has angered and outraged us. At times like this, we welcome Jesus into our fearful, anxious hearts. This is one of the reasons why we celebrate Advent. It is a season of expectant waiting, and we light a new candle each week. The earlier candles have burned down, now misshapen, showing our patience wearing thin, our longing growing more fierce. And so we prepare ourselves in a fresh way for the coming of our Lord Jesus in our Christmas celebrations because hope, love, joy, and peace aren't just words we find on Christmas cards. No, we find them in Christ, who is our light, the most peaceful light we could ever experience. Like we read in the book of John, the light shines in the darkness and the darkness has not overcome it. The true light that gives light to everyone was coming into the world. Jesus is that light. The prophet Isaiah calls him the one who would come, that he would be the prince of peace for hearts that grieve in a world in turmoil. We are a people whose whole lives have been go with the flow, but it is Jesus who shows us how to march to the beat of God's heart, who shows us what it means to really live. So let's welcome him. We welcome you with all of your peace, Jesus. Give us your peace so that we can be peace bringers. Stop us in our tracks so that the flicker of the flame captures our attention, so that we look past the flow of the world to Jesus who says to some meaningful plans with your family. I can't wait to experience the Christmas Eve service with you guys. I can't wait for y'all to experience the Christmas Eve service. I think it's going to be a really special time for Grace. This week, we want to wrap up the four different topics that we cover in Advent as we talk about peace. Aaron opened talking about hope. I got to talk about love. Kyle taught us about joy. And now we get to focus on the peace that Jesus brings us. As I reflected on peace this week, I was reminded of a story, something that happened to me on an airplane a few years ago. And now I'll warn you, I'm going to tell this story and it's going to make me look kind of good because I do nice things. I try not to share stories about myself that shed me in a positive light because I think that's gross and self-aggrandizing. But this one just kind of makes the point pretty well. So if you'll indulge me, I'll admit some kindness to you. I was getting on a plane a couple of years ago, and I sat down, and I sat down next to this older woman. It was just two on each side and two seats on each side. And as I sat down, it will not surprise you to learn that I'm not one that introduces myself to my seatmate on my plane. I'm one who just sits down and silently stares straight ahead until the plane lands, and then I get off and go about my business. But this particular woman decided that she wanted to introduce herself to me, and so we started talking. And it didn't take very long for her to say that this was her first flight ever. And I said, oh, really? Are you nervous? And she said, yeah, I actually am pretty nervous. I struggle with anxieties. It was hard for me to even get on the plane. Have you flown before? And I said, you're in luck. Don't worry. I've flown probably hundreds of times. I will guide you through the process. I'm not going to be worried at all. As a matter of fact, this is what I told her. I said, listen, when we're flying, if something feels weird, if it feels like it shouldn't happen, if you start to get nervous, you just look at my face. And if I'm calm, you can be calm. If I'm at peace, then you can be at peace. If I'm not worried, then you don't have to be worried. If it feels amiss to you, because if you've never flown before, there's all kinds of things that can happen that can make you go, wait a second, is this safe? Is this okay? And so I told her, if you are experiencing that, just look at me. And if I'm calm, you can be calm. I said, as a matter of fact, I'm going to leave my hand right here on this armrest. And if you feel the need to reach over and grab my hand, you feel free to do that. And we'll get through this together. And she said, okay, thank you. Good. So we're sitting there, we're minding our business. The plane taxis and it goes to take off. And as it takes off, I'm already kind of have my eyes closed, dozing a little bit. It's a short flight. I was just trying to get in a quick nap. And as the plane is picking up off the ground, which if you've never experienced that before, it can feel a little turbulent, I feel her hand reach over and grab mine. And so I just give her a little squeeze and let her know everything's going to be okay. We get up into the air and we're cruising. She's good. I'm good. I'm reading a little bit. And then I close my eyes to doze again. And as I close my eyes, the plane hits a little bit of turbulence. And if you've never experienced turbulence before, it can be scary. You bounce a lot. It can make you feel sick to your stomach. And if you've never experienced it before and you're already worried about flying, that can be a really terrifying thing. And so we begin to experience a little bit of turbulence. We're bouncing around and I'm aware that she's probably freaking out a little bit. So I keep my eyes closed. I'm not dozing anymore, but I keep my eyes closed because I just kind of have a feeling she's looking at me to see if I'm calm, to see if I'm worried. And I wanted to project some peace for her. I wanted her to know this is no big deal. It's just normal turbulence. And so while I'm sitting there kind of fake snoozing, trying to offer peace to her, I just kind of do a thumbs up with my hand like this, like it's going to be, it's all right. You got nothing to worry about. And I feel her hand kind of tap mine, like, thank you. I see that. I appreciate that. And we got through the flight. We landed. She said, thank you. She went about her business. I went about mine. And it just, that principle that I took away from that as I was thinking about peace and that story this week is just this idea of, hey, listen, you just look at me. If I'm calm, you can be calm. If I'm not worried, you don't have to be worried. If I'm at peace, you can be at peace. I was thinking about that idea and how often Jesus does this for us in the Bible. It's something that we don't think about a lot. I never thought about it before this week. But then as I looked at the Bible and I went through the stories of Jesus in my mind and kind of asked that question, what are the times that Jesus looks at us? And he says, listen, look at me. If I'm not worried, you don't need to be worried. If I'm at peace, then you can be at peace. And I saw over and over again in Scripture where Jesus offers us his peace. Maybe the most glaring example, the easiest place to go to is when Jesus calms the storm. A lot of us know this story. This is a story that shows up in Matthew, Mark, and Luke, three of the four Gospels. But we're going to look at the story in Mark, chapter 4, verses 35-41, just to make sure we're all on the same page. If you have a Bible, turn there with me as I read. It says down in verse 35, This is Jesus speaking. I love the story of Jesus calming the storm. The disciples are out on a boat. They're in the Sea of Galilee. They have been there thousands of times before. They are a crew of mostly fishermen. And the wind picks up and the waves start to buffet the boat and the water starts to come into the boat in such a way that they are freaked out. And it's a big deal that they're freaked out because, again, these are seasoned fishermen. They had weathered some storms. This isn't the lady on the plane experiencing light turbulence for the first time. This is the seasoned businessman or businesswoman who flies cross country twice a week going, holy smokes, what is gonna happen? This has to be the end. They're freaking out. They're so scared that they go and they wake up Jesus who's managing to sleep through this. And they say, are you not worried? Are you not worried? Can you not see that we are perishing? And Jesus is almost annoyed with them. And I see him stretching out a hand and saying, peace, be still. And everything calms. And they marvel at who this man is and what he can do. His legend with them grows. But the part of it that I see now as I think about this idea of peace is this invitation from Jesus. They're up there on the deck freaking out. They look at Jesus. He's sleeping. And what they should have done is said, he's clearly not worried. We don't have to be. And that's Jesus' first question to them. When they wake him, he says, why do you have no faith? Don't you see me? I'm at peace. You can be at peace. I'm not worried about this storm. You don't need to be worried about the storm. I'm not anxious. You don't have to be anxious. Look at my face. If I'm calm, you can be calm. If I'm not worried, you don't have to be worried. The disciples forgot in that moment who Jesus was. Or they didn't yet realize who he was. But it's so interesting to me that Jesus challenges their faith. Just look at me. Just remember who I am. If I'm not worried, you don't need to be worried. And I realize that Jesus has this habit of calming storms in our life. He has this habit of remaining stoic, of remaining calm, of remaining unmoved in the face of turmoil. And he reminds us from the scripture, if I'm not worried, you don't have to be worried. I was reminded of the story of the adulterous woman and thought about the peace that Jesus must have given her in that moment. In the book of John, there's this famous story where Jesus is teaching in, I believe, Jerusalem, and the Pharisees, the religious leaders of the day, go and they catch a woman in the act of adultery. They drag her through the streets, and they put her down at the feet of Jesus. And they say to Jesus, the law of Moses says that she should be stoned. What do you think we should do with her? You see, they think that they have Jesus between a rock and a hard place. Because here's Jesus, this new radical teacher, who's teaching and proclaiming grace. And yet, they bring this adulterous woman in front of him. And if he says we should stone her, then he has no mercy, and the people that he's teaching will lose interest in what he's saying. If he says that we should forgive if we'll stop for just a second and think about it from her perspective. Being in the act of adultery, having men storm into the house or the room, grab her and drag her into the street. Maybe she was able to grab a sheet on the way. Maybe she wasn't. We don't know. And she knows the penalty for what she's doing. She knows who these men are. They are Pharisees. And she knows the penalty for what she's doing. It is to have big rocks dropped on her head until she dies. She knows that. She has to be at the height of fear and anxiety in her life. There is no possible way she was ever more worried or anxious than she was in this moment. And there she lands at the feet of this new radical teacher named Jesus. And for some reason, somehow, she realizes that her fate now rests in his hands. And these angry men are accusing her, and they're asking Jesus, what should we do with her? I would love to be able to go back in time and see whatever look it was that Jesus gave her. I would love to see her eyes connect with his. I would love to see his calm and tranquility transposed onto her. I would love to see the recognition on her face when she realized that she was in good hands. And Jesus responds in the midst of all this turmoil and chaos. Let he who is without sin cast the first stone. And one by one, the Pharisees begin to go away. And then he looks down at her and he says, is there anyone left to condemn you? And she says, no, Lord. And he says, neither do I condemn you. And it's one of my favorite stories. Neither do I condemn you, go and sin no more. It's one of my favorite stories about Jesus to see this perfect balance of grace and truth in that moment. But what I've never thought about is the peace that he gave her, is the peace that he imparted onto her. When she is worried, she is anxious, she is fearful, she doesn't know if this is going to work out. And Jesus almost, you can just see him. Just look at me. If I'm calm, you can be calm. If I'm at peace, you can be at peace. If I'm not worried, then you don't need to be worried. Look at me. I've got this. These men will not harm you today. I'm going to protect you. Think about the peace and the certainty that he gave her in that moment. I think about the night that Jesus was arrested. He gets done praying in the Garden of Gethsemane. They've just finished their Passover meal. The disciples are outside with him, and the guards of Caiaphas, the high priest, come to arrest Christ. And in the scuffle, Peter takes a sword and lops off the ear of one of the guards. And Jesus stops everything and he reaches down and he picks up the ear and he places it back on the soldier. And it's almost as if he's saying, Peter, calm down. I'm not worried. This has to happen. And if I'm not anxious, then you don't have to be anxious. If I can be calm about this, you can be calm about this. Scripture tells us that Jesus was crucified, that he was led like a lamb to the slaughter, that he was quiet and that he was passive and that he was calm, that he was in perfect peace. And he's telling the disciples, if I can be at peace with this, that this is supposed to happen, then you can be too. Don't worry. It's going to be okay. What Jesus knows is that in three days he's going to conquer this death that he's about to face. He offers them perfect peace. You look at me. While everyone else in the Garden of Gethsemane, the troops are likely terrified because this Jesus figure just spoke words that knocked them all down. Now they have to get up, dust themselves off, and try to arrest this guy. The disciples are seeing their Messiah being taken, their leader being taken. Everyone around him is freaking out, and Jesus is in perfect peace. Look at me. I'm fine. You can be fine too. The last moment I would take you to is in the book of Revelation. John, at the end of his life, lifelong disciple of Christ, is whisked up to heaven for a vision and told to write down what he sees and share it with the people. And when he gets there, he's terrified. He sees God and he sees angels and he sees the span of heaven and he feels his feebleness. He feels how small he is and he's not exactly sure where he is and he's seeing angels for the first time, which are terrifying creatures, and he's kind of hunkered down in a corner, not sure what's going on. And in that moment, we see in Revelation that he feels a hand on his shoulder. And he hears a voice. And it's the voice of Jesus. And he says, I am the Alpha and the Omega, the beginning and the end. And I have the keys to death and Hades. One of the great lines in the Bible. In this moment where John is anxious and terrified, Jesus gives him peace, puts his hand on his shoulder, lets him hear his voice, and he says, I'm here. I've got this. I'm the one that's in control of this space. You're going to be okay. He offers John his peace. And so as I thought about all these different stories, and there's more. I could do this for a lot longer. It occurred to me, this idea of look at my face. If I'm calm, you can be calm. What's happening in that moment is that Jesus is imparting peace onto us. So what we need to realize is our peace is imparted by Jesus. The peace that we're offered in Scripture, the peace that God offers to us is imparted to us by Jesus. When we look at His face and see that He is calm, we can be calm. When we look to Him and see that He is at peace, then we can feel peace. When everything around us is chaos, and everyone around us is worried and losing their mind, we can look at Jesus who is not worried, who is calm, who is a picture of perfect peace, and we can experience his peace. And in that way, our peace is imparted to us by Jesus himself. And so it made me wonder, how is Jesus able to maintain perfect peace in all these situations? How is he at so much peace in a storm where seasoned fishermen are freaking out that he is taking a nap? When he is at the epicenter of an entire body of really smart men trying to entangle him, how can he be so calm and answer so eloquently and succinctly while protecting this woman? When he is being marched to his death, how can he maintain perfect peace knowing what lies ahead of him? It's because of this. Because Jesus has true peace. And true peace is certainty that is untouched by circumstances. Peace is certainty that is untouched by circumstances. It's like Jesus knows a secret. He's unmoved by everything around him because he knows it's all going to be okay. He's not worried about the storm sinking his boat because he's the creator of the storm. He made the heavens and the earth. Without him, there is nothing is made, says the book of John. So he's not worried about the storm because he made the storm. He's not worried about getting tripped up and entangled in the law because he wrote the law. He's not worried about getting marched off to his death because he came to do just that and he knows where that ends. That ends in him conquering the death that he is about to suffer for you and for me. He came to conquer death and sin and that's how he did it. So he's at perfect peace in going through the process. He's at perfect peace in heaven when everything feels like it's at chaos at the end of times because this is what he came to do and he offers that peace to John. Jesus has a peace that is untouched by circumstance because nothing in this world can change that God is sovereign. Nothing in this world can change that God's will will be done. Nothing in this world can change that God loves you. Nothing in this world can change that God has a perfect plan and in the fullness of time he will execute it. Nothing in this world can change that for those who believe in him we can look forward to an eternity where God is with his people and where we will be with our God and where there is no more weeping and no more crying and no more pain anymore. Because God is in control, because God has orchestrated all of time to bring about that moment, we know that there are no circumstances that can change the certainty that we have in Christ. And so we have perfect peace. Maybe this is why Paul writes about peace in the book of Philippians and points us to God in prayer so that we might have perfect peace. In Philippians, Paul writes this in chapter 4, verses 6 and 7. He says, Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understandings, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. You understand that our peace isn't just imparted by Christ, but our peace is guarded by God? As believers, we have this Christ-imparted, God-guarded peace that circumstances cannot touch. You understand that God advocates for your peace, that He wants you to feel at ease? He does not want you to be anxious. He does not want you to move through life with anxiety. He does not want you to be crippled by worry. He does not want you to be one of the ones freaking out and wondering how everything is going to be okay. And because of that, he offers you Christ-imparted and God-guarded peace so that your soul can be at rest. So we don't have to worry so much. And guys, has there ever been a year in our memories where we needed this peace more? where it feels like everyone around us is losing their mind, where we're in a culture that is rife with racial and political tension, where we're seeing riots and demonstrations and we're wondering what is going on here, where we are in a country that is more divided than ever, When will I ever get to see my loved ones? Is the vaccine really going to work? Will the economy recover? Will I be able to find a new job? Will my position still be there? We have all sorts of anxieties and worries this year. Has there ever been a time when we needed God's peace more? I know that for me, I've needed that peace this year. For me, I've worried a lot about grace. When we went into quarantine in March, we had come off of what was, while I've been here, a high point while I've been at grace. More people than we've ever seen were coming every week. We did a campaign. We were hoping to get a $1.5 million pledge. We had $1.6 million pledge. I would have never expected that. God was moving and shaking, and there was so much contagious enthusiasm here, and then we just had to stop meeting. And for a while, into doing online services like this, I would look for those numbers every week. How many people are watching online? How many screens we're on? How many downloads do we have? What's our engagement look like? Are we losing our momentum? Oh no, God, the church is gonna crumble. Everything's gonna fall apart. I think we're starting to lose people. I'm really worried and I lost sleep over what was happening at at Grace until I was gently reminded to just look at God. And over the course of the year, I saw his hand on Grace. I was so worried about giving because we're not meeting in person, and we're not telling anybody to give online, and I wouldn't dare, especially if you remember the beginning of quarantine when the economy was tanking and everything was going bad, I wouldn't dare ask for money then. So I just buttoned it up and just hoped. And God just continued to provide everything that the church needed, even so that we were able to continue to give away to other ministries who were in need. And God just reminded me over and over and over again over the course of the year, I care about grace. I've got this place. Look at me. Do I look worried? And so now, I don't even look at the numbers. Steve emails them to me every week as is our habit. I never even open it. Sorry, Steve. Because I don't care. They don't matter to me. God's got this church. We're not going anywhere. He's got big plans for us. He's chosen to sustain us. I have a certainty about grace that is untouched by circumstances because I see that God's not worried, so I'm not. He offers us this peace in our lives too. He's not worried about your kids. He's got a plan for them. He's not worried about how your family is going to make it. He's got a plan for that. He's not worried about if everything's going to be okay. He's not worried about what's it going to look like as we try to return back to normal. God isn't concerned with pandemics. He's unfazed with 2020. I promise you he's seen harder years from heaven. But I think sometimes we get so caught up in our worry and in our anxiety and in the circumstances of the day that we keep our focus down. And maybe what we need to do is slow down and let him impart his peace. Maybe this morning or wherever we are as we listen to this or watch this, what we really need to do is just slow down, look at the face of Christ, and let him impart his peace. Let him guard our hearts with perfect peace. When we will be people who will do that, who will constantly put our focus on Christ and not on circumstances, who will allow him to impart his God-guarded peace on us, we can have conversations like I got to have this week. Many of you are aware of what Jen's family is walking through, and just this last week I sat next to my father-in-law in his bed as he moves towards passing away. And I knelt next to him and I told him that it was time for me to say goodbye. And he said, oh, are you going somewhere? I said, no, John, I'm not, but you are. And he said, yeah, I am. And we shared a really sweet moment that caused me to go ugly cry for about 15 minutes on my own in the bathroom somewhere. But at the end of the conversation, I said, John, you're going to go to heaven soon. And you're going to see his parents are Porter and Bernice. You're going to see Porter and Bernice. You're going to hug them. They're going to be glad to see you. Jesus is going to be there. He's going to be glad to see you too. And John whispered in his soft and weak voice, yeah, and when I get there, there's going to be a lot of rejoicing. He's not afraid to die. He's anxious for it. He welcomes it. Because he has a peace that is untouched by circumstance. Because he knows where he's going. He's focused on the face of Christ and Christ is waiting to welcome him into perfect peace. And if there is a peace that is so strong that when someone is hours away from transitioning into the next life, they can lay in their bed at perfect peace and be certain that they are not about to be sad, but that they are about to rejoice. That's the kind of peace that we should want. And Christmas is our yearly reminder that God offers us a peace that no circumstance can touch. This year, as we celebrate Jesus, let's remember that Jesus imparts a peace on us. He imparts a certainty that circumstance can't touch, that God guards this peace. And maybe instead of being worried about all the things that we can't control anyways, what we should do is slow down and focus on the face of Christ and hear him say to us, I'm not worried. You don't have to be either. And let's all of us experience perfect peace as we finish up this year. Let's pray. Father, we are so grateful for your peace. We are so grateful for the way that you guard our hearts, that you don't want us to be anxious, that you don't want us to be worried. Lord, I pray that if there are people hearing this who are anxious, who are riddled with anxiety, who are riddled with worry, who haven't felt peace and rest in a long time, God, would you give their soul rest in you? Would they hear you today saying, look at me. If I'm calm, you can be calm. Would they today accept your peace? Would they rest easy in that? God, I pray for every person who can hear my voice, that they would experience the same peace that Jesus had, a peace that is untouched by any circumstance. Father, thank you for that gift. It's in your son's name we pray. Amen.

This morning we are jumping into a brand new series simply called James, where we're going through the book of James in the Bible. The book of James is one of my favorite books, mostly because James tells it like it is, man. Like, James is blunt. He just kicks you in the teeth, and I need that. Subtlety doesn't work for me. I need you to just tell me what I need to do and tell me how I've messed up. And that's exactly what James does. So I'm excited to go through it with you. Another thing about the book of James that I like to share, because I think it's a really well-made point. It's not mine. It's a pastor named Andy Stanley. James is the half-brother of Jesus. And he ends up writing a book of the Bible and is one of the leaders, along with Peter, of the early church. He's like the very first early church father. So James believed that Jesus was the Son of God. Those of you with brothers or sisters, what would it take for them to convince you that God sent them from above and they came to die on a cross and save the whole world? Like what would it take for you to believe your brother or your sister when they said that? Because James believes that, that's pretty good evidence that Jesus was who he says he was, right? That's Andy Stanley's point, not mine, but it's a good reason to listen to James. As we approach the book of James, I'm actually going to share a video with you guys. There's a group called The Bible Project online. If you don't know about them, you should. They make tons of great videos that explain books of the Bible. You can find one for almost any book of the Bible. Just go to Bible Project. You can Google it. If you're at home right now, don't go yet. I'm about to show you a video. Please stay locked in here. But they make books, they make videos about the books of the Bible and about themes in the Bible. It's a tremendous way to begin to understand and approach Scripture. And I thought the one that they made for James was so good that as we kicked off the series, it was the best possible way to kind of prime us for what to expect. It's a little bit longer of a video. It's about eight minutes long. So settle in and buckle up, and we're going to watch this intro video to James together. Here you go. I hope that you enjoyed that. If the biggest thing that you get out of this Sunday, honestly, is to use that more in your personal life, I'm good with that. It's a really, really good resource. So I hope that you appreciated that video and how easy it is to kind of make the whole book approachable now as we read it. If you don't have a reading plan, you can grab one on the way out or we have them online on our live page. This week is set up just like chapter one is. You can see from the video that chapter one's kind of a setup for the rest of the book and the themes and the things that we need to be familiar with so that we can understand it and apply it to ourselves as we move through the book, and in this case, as we move through the series. And so that's what I want to try to do this morning, is pull out the themes and help us set up some parameters around what we're going to talk about for the remaining five weeks of the series. This is going to be a six-week series that's actually going to carry us into Advent. I'm really excited for our Christmas series that we're already working on that we've got coming up. So this is going to carry us all the way through to Thanksgiving. One of the things in the video that I wanted to point out that I thought could help us approach the overarching point of the book of James is that idea of perfection and living lives as our whole selves versus living lives, they called it in the video, as our compromised selves. I think that this is something that we can all relate to. In chapter one, they said that through the book of James that this word perfect or whole appears seven times and that James is writing to push us in that direction. And I think that we can relate to a need to be made whole in that way because many of us know what it is to live disjointed lives, right? I feel like if you're a believer for any amount of time, you know what it is to live a life that doesn't feel all the way in sync. You see a version of yourself that you know that God created you to be. I know that I can walk in that obedience. I see who he wants me to be, and yet I continue to walk in this direction and be this person that I don't want to be, but I keep getting pulled in that direction. We know what it is to come to church on a Sunday, maybe have a good experience, be moved by the worship, which I was this morning, that was great. Be moved by the worship. Be moved by the sermon. Feel a closeness to Jesus. Feel like it was a sweet moment. And then Monday morning you wake up and you go crack skulls at work. Monday morning you wake up and you forget that yesterday was a sweet moment. Maybe it doesn't even make it to the next day. Maybe you had a sweet moment and then in the car the wife says the thing that you don't want her to say and then you're off to the races, right? And there goes that peace and harmony. You know what it is to wake up in the morning, to have a quiet time, to devote some time to God, to spend time in God's Word, to spend time in prayer, and on that very same day lose your mind with your co-workers or your kids or your spouse. We know what it is to have a habit or a hang-up that we say, I'm done with this. I'm not doing this anymore. This has owned my life and has displeased God and displeased me for too long. I'm drawing a line in the sand. I'm not doing this anymore. And then maybe we added in some controls and some accountability and we asked people to help us out. And we took this stand. I'm going to live as that person finally. And then a day or a week or a month later, we do the same thing. And we live as the version of ourselves that we don't like, that Jesus died to save us from. But for some reason, we continue to go back there. I think we all relate to what I find to be one of the most encouraging passages in Scripture in Romans chapter 7 when Paul writes, he says, the things that I want to do, I do not do. The things that I do not want to do, I do. So he's talking about this tension. I see the things that I want to do. I see the person who I want to become. I want to do those things, but for some reason I can't walk in that life totally. And then I see this person that I don't want to be. I don't want to make these choices, but I can't stop myself from making those choices. The things that I want to do, I do not do. The things that I do not want to do, I do. And then he finishes off at the end of chapter seven with this great verse. He says in declaration, oh, wretched man that I am, who will deliver me from this body of death? I've taken the time a couple of times in my life to read all the way through the book of Romans from start to finish, it's great for plane rides, I always stop at that verse and just kind of go, thank you God for Paul and for his experience of this too. Oh wretched man that I am who will deliver me from this body of death? Because we know what it is to feel out of sync. The Bible calls it our new self and our old self. That our old self was crucified with Christ and it no longer lives and now Jesus lives in me and we're free to walk in this new self but there is this part of the world that continues to drag us down and make us less than whole. And it's this that James writes to address. He writes to the church, and I believe that the reason that James writes the letter is to help us pursue wholeness. James is written to help us pursue wholeness. That wholeness that is walking in the person that God created us to be, walking in the person that Jesus made it possible to be in the first place through his death, walking as that person, walking in that wholeness. He wants us to no longer live these disjointed, out of sync, incomplete lives. I think we'll see that's why he wrote the whole book. His goal is, some people call it maturity, others call it wholeness. He calls it perfection or completion. His goal is to help us get there. We understand that the only way there is through Christ, but we also understand that in this earth, on this side of eternity, that God asks us to obey. He asks us to walk and to follow. And in doing that, we will grow into mature versions of ourselves and to who God wants us to be. And so James writes to help us pursue that wholeness. And I think that's true because of this passage, chapter 1. If you have a Bible, you can open it. If you have one at home, open one there, and you should have the scriptures in your notes. But I'd love for you guys to be interacting with the Bible and with the chapter and see how it all ties together. But if someone were to ask me, point me to the synopsis verses on why James is even written. What is James trying to do? I would take you here. This is where I think he's trying to help us pursue wholeness. Chapter 1, verses 22 through 25 why James writes the book. Because he wants us to be doers who act. He wants us to persevere. He says we shouldn't be like, again, it's this imagery of two versions of ourselves. Don't be the person that looks at the law of God. He calls it the perfect law of liberty, which I love that phrase because God's word was not given to us to constrain us, but to offer us liberty. And that perfect liberty, that perfect law of liberty is Christ. He is the word of God. And he rewrote the law of the Old Testament to say, go and love others as I have loved you. Love God and love others. That's how Jesus rewrites and summarizes the law correctly. And he says that there's one version of us that we stare at the law, we see what it says, we hear it, we pay attention to sermons, maybe we listen to podcasts, we talk with friends about spiritual things, we have our ears open. We hear the word, but then we go and we don't do it. We live lives as those disjointed versions of ourselves. He says, when you do that, you're like somebody who looks at your face in the mirror and then walks away and you forget what you look like. He said, but if you'll gaze into the perfect law of liberty and persevere in doing it, then you will be blessed in your doing. And so I think the answer to our question, James says first, we say first that James writes to help us pursue holiness. So the question becomes, okay, James, how do I pursue holiness? Well, he tells us in these verses, we pursue wholeness by persevering in doing. We pursue wholeness, that complete version of ourselves, by persevering in doing. So that, I think, as a summary statement, begs two questions. Why does James feel it necessary to highlight persevering? Why does he put that out front? Why does he open up the book with it? It's the very first thing, once he starts writing. He says, hey guys, how you doing? And then he starts talking about how pain is going to happen. Why is it that James says right away, if you want to live as a whole self and you need to persevere, because he's communicating this idea of you're going to want to quit. It's going to be really hard. It's kind of a terrible selling point for James. So why does he start there? And then what does doing look like? What are we supposed to be doing? So as we answer those questions, the first question, why persevering? Well, we persevere because life requires it. We persevere because life requires it. James is aware of this reality. Like I said, it's how he starts his letter. Literally, verse 1, James, the servant of God and the Lord Jesus Christ to the 12 tribes and the dispersion. Greetings, which means the Hebrew people who have dispersed outside of Israel. You also refer to it as a diaspora. Then, verse 2, count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds. He says, hey, how you doing? Haven't seen you in a while. Listen, life's going to stink like a lot, and when it does, just count it joy. Like, that's a terrible opener. James, why are you doing that? But he says, count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds, for you know the testing of your faith produces steadfastness perseverance instead of steadfastness. But he says, And plenty of people have pointed this out before, but just in case you missed it those times, he doesn't say, if you have trials. He doesn't say, hey, if life gets hard sometimes, not saying it well, but if it does, then hang in there. He says, no, no, when? When you face trials, plural, of all kinds, count them as joy. Why? Because they're going to bear out a perseverance and a steadfastness that's going to make us perfect and complete, not lacking anything. It's this idea of being a whole person again. So a couple things from that idea and why James introduces it as a theme that shows up throughout the book. We find it again in chapter 5 when he's talking about having patience and doing good. James knows that your faith is going to be challenged. He knows that perseverance is going to be required. He knows that there are going to be couples who struggle mightily with infertility, and all they want is to experience the joy of having their own child. He knows that. And he knows that when that happens, it's going to test their faith, and it's going to make them wonder if God is really good. James knows that we lose people too early. He knew that parents would mourn the loss of children. He knows that. And because he knows that, he knows that it's going to be really easy for those parents in that moment to cry out and say, God, that's not fair. Why'd you let that happen? And that those circumstances would conspire to shipwreck your faith. And so he says, hang in there. Have faith when it's hard. He knows that marriages will end and that diagnoses will come and that abuse will happen and that abandonment is a thing and that loneliness and depression are things that we walk through. He knows that we are going to lose loved ones before we want to. James knows that and he knows that when those things happen, we're going to want to walk away from our faith because it's going to seem like God isn't looking out for us anymore. And he's telling you when that happens and it seems like things are broken, hang on, persevere, continue in faith, Continue to obey. And when you do, it will make you perfect and complete, not lacking anything. This is the real reason for perseverance. Those of you whose faith has seen that test, those of you who have walked through a season in your life where something happened that was so hard that it made you doubt if God was really looking out for you, it made you doubt if God really cared about you, it made you question your faith, if you came out of that clinging on to your faith, you know it is all the stronger. I was actually talking with someone this last week about this idea, and we just kind of noted, I noted, I don't really trust someone's faith very much until it's been through tragedy. Until it's been hardened in that kiln, I just don't trust it yet. There is something to the people who have walked through tragedy and yet have this faith that they cling to that makes it unshakable. Isn't there? I think of somebody who's going to be an elder in the new year, Brad Gwynn. To my recollection, Brad has lost his sister and his brother and his mom. He's, I don't know, in his 60s, maybe late 50s. Sorry, Brad, I don't know. He's been through tragedy. His faith has been through the tests. But if you talk to him about Jesus and about why he believes, it's humbling. It's admirable. I can honestly tell you, I don't know if I want faith that strong because I don't want to walk through what he has to walk through to have it. But I want faith that strong. James knows, if you cling to your faith through trial, if you cling to Jesus and continue to obey him even when it's hard, that it will produce this completion in us. It will produce this firm, unshakable faith that cannot be shaken, that cannot be torn down. So he opens with, hey, hang in there. Because when you do, you're going to be stronger for it. So if we're supposed to hang in there, if we're supposed to continue to obey, even when it's hard, what is it that we're supposed to do? What does doing look like, right? What does God want from us? What does he expect from us? James is setting something up for the rest of the book to go through, like, here's some simple ways to obey. If you really want to please God, then here's a simple way to do it. If you really want to walk as that person, then these are the things that you need to be doing. These are the things that you need to be paying attention to. The question becomes, what does it look like to do? And I think he answers this question by saying, doing looks like helping the needy and pursuing holiness. Doing, obeying God, walking as a whole person, looks like helping the needy and pursuing holiness. Here's why I think this. Look at verse 27. Religion that is pure and undefiled before God the Father is this, to visit orphans and widows in their affliction and to keep oneself unstained from the world. Religion that is pure and undefiled before God. You want to do what God wants you to do? You want to live out your faith? You want to live as a whole person? Then here's what you need to do. Care for the widows and the orphan and their affliction and keep yourself unstained from the world. Help the needy and pursue holiness. That's a synopsis for everything that comes in the rest of the book. Everything that comes in the rest of the book is telling you, here's the heart conditions you need to help the needy. Here's why you should do that. Here's why it's near to God's heart. Everything that happens in the rest of the book is, here's what you do. If you want to pursue holiness, then here's how you do it. And this is a theme throughout the Bible. In Isaiah chapter one, we see the very same thing. He distills, Isaiah distills it all down. God says, you want to make me happy? Care for the widows and the orphans. Pursue me. That's what you need to do. Micah says that we should seek justice, love mercy, and to walk humbly with God. It's all through Scripture. So if we want to persevere in doing, what does doing look like? Doing looks like helping the needy and pursuing holiness. And when I say helping the needy, I really do mean that because in that culture, you've heard me teach this before, but for those who may have missed it or have joined recently, when we see widows and orphans in the Bible, what we need to understand is that in that culture, that was the least of these. Widows were typically older women who had no way to make any money. So if their husband had passed away and now they're living as single women and they don't have families to care for them, there is very little they can do besides beg for sustenance every day. They are the most exposed and endangered and vulnerable in that culture. Likewise, orphans are the most exposed and vulnerable in that culture. There's no welfare. There's no orphanages. There's no Social security, there's no public medicine, there's none of that. They're just on their own. And God says, my people should have a heart to care for those who can't care for themselves. My people should have a heart to care for those in the greatest need. That's why at Grace we partner with Faith Ministry down in Mexico that builds homes for people who can't afford their own homes because they work in a Panasonic factory for less than a dollar a day. So we send money down there and build them homes and go down there in teams every year to love the least of these, to care for those who can't care for themselves. We heard earlier Mikey talk about Addis Jamari, who literally cares for orphans in Ethiopia. As girls age out of the orphanages and have no life skills and nothing to do with themselves, they take them into a home, teach them skills, send them back to school, and give them a path forward. And now they work with families on the front end of it so that when they have new babies and they don't know what to do and they're too poor to afford these babies, they give them materials and they give them training and they give them money so that they don't have to turn those kids into orphans but they can grow up in good solid homes. That's why we partner with them. That's why so many people at our church are all into a seat at the table downtown where it's a pay what you can restaurant so that you can go and have your meal and leave a token behind so that someone else can have a meal too if they can't afford it. Caring for the needy is near and dear to God's heart. And I would say to you this, if you're a believer and a part of your regular behavior and pattern isn't to care for those in need, then I don't think you're doing all that God has for you to do. I don't think it's possible to say, I'm walking in lockstep with Jesus. I'm being exactly who he created to me. I love him with my whole heart. I spend my days with him. I commune with God in prayer and yet still not help the needy. It's one of the first things that shows up in every teaching in scripture that if you love God, you'll help those who can't help themselves. Not only should we be about this as a church, we need to be about this as individuals. If you call yourself a Christian, if you claim God as your Father and Jesus as your Savior and that's not a part of your pattern, I would encourage you to find a way to make that a part of your pattern. There's a part of God that we find in doing that work. It's who His children are designed to be. And then He tells us that we should pursue holiness. Keep yourself unstained from this world. The word holy simply means different or other. In Scripture we're told to be holy as God is holy. And it's this command, it's this acknowledgement. Listen, you're different. You're different than the world. You're not better than the world. We're cut from the same cloth. You know Jesus, and the world doesn't yet know Jesus. That's the difference. You're not better than anybody, but you're different than them. And we're called to be different than the world. We're called to laugh at different jokes. We're called to post different political memes, if any at all, ever. We're called to argue differently in the public square. We're called to behave differently than them. We're called to love differently than the world. We're called to watch different things than what they watch. We're called to different standards than what they're called to. Personal holiness matters a lot. And James says, if you want to be a whole person, then persevere in doing. And what does doing look like? It looks like helping the needy and pursuing holiness. Now listen, we're holy because Jesus has made us holy. We're already there because Jesus has died for us and we are clothed in his righteousness. However, in this life, the Bible reminds us over and over again that we are to obey. And obeying takes our effort. So as far as it depends on us, we help the needy and we pursue holiness. And the rest of the book is about really unpacking that idea. What are the heart conditions that exist around helping those who can't help themselves? And what does it look like to live holy and unstained in this world? So I hope that that will serve as a good primer to get you ready for the rest of the book of James. Next week we come back with probably the easiest thing to do. It's why we're starting off with it, taming the tongue. And then we're going to move on to the rest of the book. I'm really looking forward to going through this book with you guys. I'm going to pray for us and then we will be dismissed. Father, you're good to us. My goodness. You're good to us and we're not good to you. You remain faithful to us when we are faithless. God, you watch us live our disjointed lives. And you're patient with us, and you're gentle, and you're loving. Father, I pray that as we go through this series, that everybody who hears it or preaches it, God would just have their heart enlivened to this idea of walking wholly with you. Of walking in lockstep with Jesus. Give us visions of actually being the people that you created us to be, of leaving behind our disjointed selves. Give us the honesty to identify where we're not obedient, and give us the courage to walk in the obedience that you show us. It's in your Son's name we pray these things. Amen.

This morning, we are in the last part of our series called With. We've been walking through a book by a pastor and author named Sky Jethani, talking about our postures before God, which ones are appropriate, which ones are helpful, and which ones are not. And so we've spent four weeks looking at postures that ultimately are not helpful for us, postures that ultimately lead to a spiritually empty life and are ultimately damaging. And so we've kind of just left every week where we talk about a posture, we help each other see that in ourselves, and we go, yeah, that's not good. And then we pray and we go home, and it's been kind of a downer. So this week is the resolution to all of those postures. You'll remember that the first one we talked about was life under God. And we said in this posture, the mindset is, God, I'm going to obey you and submit to your authority in exchange for your protection in my life. I'm going to obey you and then things are going to go well for me. You're going to keep me from heartache and trial. And we saw that that never happens. Life is going to involve tragedy. It's going to involve hurt. It's going to involve loss. And that what we're trying to do when we say, God, I'm going to obey you and you protect me, is we're really trying to control the universe via God. It's our subtle way of regaining control over the things that we fear, and that's ultimately empty. We talked about the life over God posture. The life over God posture says, God, I'm not really interested in your authority in my life. I'm going to live my life over you, but I am going to extract from you and your word some best practices to apply to my life so that things can go better for me. Life from God says, God, I'm going to follow you and you're going to bless me. I'm going to do the things that you want me to do. I'm going to live my life for you, and then you're going to give me all the things that I want. And then the life for God posture says, God, I'm going to live my life for you, and you're going to love me for it. I'm going to live my life making an impact for your kingdom, and because of that, I'm going to be more valuable to you than my peers. I'm going to earn your affection. And we saw that each of these were empty. And ultimately, they're empty because we're following God for his treasures. We're following God because there's a motivation that isn't God, it's these other things, and they fall short. And that's where the life with God posture becomes important. That's the right posture to have before the Father. And in life with God, we no longer use God for his treasures. He becomes our treasure. You see? We no longer use God to acquire the things. We no longer use God to acquire the blessings. We no longer go to him because of what we want from him. We go to him because we want him. We no longer use him for his treasures. He becomes our treasure. This is the right posture before the Lord, to simply be with him because he wants to be with us. The best way I've ever heard this explained, I actually have this explained to me by someone else before I had a child. I have a four-year-old daughter named Lily. But before Lily was ever an idea in 2013, somebody explained this posture to me in this way, and I thought it was perfect. So Eve, if you have kids, this will really resonate with you. Even if you don't yet have kids, I think you'll see the power in this. Lily is my favorite thing on the planet. I love doing everything with her. Yeah, that's right, I'm talking about your friend Lily. They picked up on it back there. I love doing everything with her. We've actually, on our front porch, we've turned around our porch swing so it faces the cul-de-sac where she runs around with her friends every day. And I love sitting out there and watching her play. I love watching her play soccer, kind of. I'm the coach, so I also hate it. But I love watching her play. I love when she brings me things and she says, look what I drew or look what I did. I love when she tells me about school. I love when she decides that she wants to talk to me and let me into her little world. I love Lily. But do you know my favorite thing to do with Lily is? Hugs and snugs, man. That's all I want. Hugs and snugs. I want her to climb up in my lap. I want her to let me hold on to her. And I want us to be quiet together. That's all I want. And I don't want us to be quiet together because I'm tired of hearing her talk or make noise. I want us to be quiet together because I just want us to rest together. Burt Banks, one of our great elders, he jokingly told me that he loves his grandchildren until they're too old to sit in his lap. Once they're too old to sit in his lap, he says, I have no use for them anymore. Because those of you who are parents, those of you who have had those little kids, when they're sitting in your lap, or those of you who are grandparents, when you get to hold them and simply be with them and just enjoy their presence, there's nothing better than that. There's nothing better than that. I love watching her play. I love watching her dance. I love it most when she climbs up in my lap. And sometimes I'll tell her, she'll ask me for something. I'll say, you can have that if you come give daddy hugs. And she'll say, how many hugs? And I'll say, a hundred. And she'll go, that's too many. How about 10? I'm like, all right, 10. So she crawls up on my lap, and she wraps her arms around me, and she says, you count. And she starts just pulsing out these hugs. And I always lose count, and I get more than she bargained for. And that's great. And I love those. But my favorite is when she wants to do it. My favorite is when she comes and she gives me hugs. No other reason just to do it. She just wants to be with me. That's the best. Why would we think that our Heavenly Father would want anything any different? He simply wants to be with you. He wants to enjoy your presence. He created you to be with Him. Do you understand it was out of the context of relationship that you were created? Do you understand that God looked around at the Trinity, the Father, Son, and the Holy Spirit, and said, we need to share this relationship with something. And so He created you so that you could share in a relationship with him. Do you understand that all he's ever wanted with you is not your performance, it's not even your devotion, it's just to be with him and all those other things come. And we see this desire of the Father. This is amazing. I love this part of the sermon, I really do, because I just think it helps Scripture make so much sense. Do you understand that this desire of the Father to simply be with us is seen throughout the narrative arc of the Bible? It's all through Scripture that all God wants with His children that He created is to be with you. If you look in Genesis 3, verse 8, it tells on God a little bit. Now, admittedly, I'm taking this verse totally out of context, and I'm using it to make a point that it was not intended to make, but now they become ultra-aware of everything around them. And they hear God, and they go and they hide, and God's about to come and confront them about their sin. That's what's happening in that verse. But here's what this verse tells on God that I want us to see. Understand that in Genesis 3, right before the fall, right before the fall of man and just as the first sin is committed, that it is perfect. You understand this? Creation is perfect. It is exactly as God intended. Every leaf is laying exactly where God wants it to lay. Every breeze is the exact temperature and pace that God wants it to be. Every day is exactly as cool in the morning and in the evening and at the midday as God wants it to be. Every piece of fruit hanging from the tree tastes exactly as God wants it to taste. Every interaction with every animal that Adam and Eve have goes exactly as God wants it to go. Adam and Eve, their days are mapped out exactly as God wants them to be. And in these days, apparently they were very used to hearing the sound of the Lord walking with them in the garden in the cool of the evening. It does not say they heard what sounded like God walking in the garden. Because they knew that sound. This is what God wanted to do. At perfection of creation, all God wanted to do is come down and hang out with Adam and Eve. You understand that? He created all of this so that in the evenings he could come down from heaven and be like, what did you guys do today? Want to hang out? And it says they hid themselves from the presence of God. They were used to him coming down and spending time with them. They knew what his presence felt like. They knew what it sounded like when he walked through the garden because this is what God wanted, but then sin messed it up. And when sin messed it up, God had to withdraw himself to heaven and say, I can no longer be with you because of your imperfection. The relationship that we had has been broken and so God is no longer with us. And what does God do to fix this? Isaiah tells us. He's going to send his son. And his name will be called Emmanuel. My Bible people know what Emmanuel means, don't you? God with us. And then he sends his son in the New Testament. So first God wanted to be with us. then sin messed it up so he could no longer be with us. You know what he did to fix our error? He came down to be with us. Look at what John writes in the first chapter. He starts off his amazing gospel and he says, In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God. And through him all things were made, and without him nothing was made. And he's telling us that Jesus is the word of God. And then you skip on down to verse 13, and he writes this, and the word became flesh and dwelt among us. He was with us. And we have seen his glory. Glory as of the only Son from the Father, full of grace and truth. God made all of creation so that he could simply be with us. Then our sin messed it up, and how did he fix it? He sent his son to be with us, to be Emmanuel God with us. The word became flesh. And it's worth pointing out here, do you understand that this is what differentiates Christianity from all other world religions? That we possess the only faith that claims that our God loves us so much that he came down to join us. Our God loves us so much that he gave up his heavenly body, his heavenly realm to condescend to be with us and get down in the muck and the mire and see the worst of us and then die for us to be with us before he went back to heaven to make a path for us to be with him for all of eternity. Do you understand that? We're the only faith that claims that. We're the only faith that claims a God who came down, who loved us enough to be with us because it's all God ever wanted. And then at the end of scripture, in Revelation chapter 21, when all is said and done, Jesus has come down. He started his, he dies for us. He starts the church. He leaves it to the disciples. We carry on that legacy until Jesus's return, which is what we're doing right now is we tell people the great news of the gospel. And then one day in Revelation, God is going to enact the end of times and a series of events are going to occur. And at the end of these series of events, Revelation 21. And I heard a loud voice from the throne saying, Behold, the dwelling place of God is with man, and he will dwell with them, and they will be his people. And God himself will be with them as their God. The climax of all of history, to usher in eternity, the very first stroke in the most perfect picture that God could paint for us is that he is with us again, and we are with him. That's all he wants over the whole arc of scripture. He created us to be with us. We screwed it up. So he sent his son to be with us again and make a way for us to be with him for all of eternity. That's all he wants. He just wants to be with us. Everything else flows from that. His perfect picture of eternity begins with his presence with us and our presence with him. And I think that's amazing. And what we see, and I don't have time to fully unpack this this morning. This is when it's really helpful to read the book for yourself and think through it on your own. But what we see when we adopt this posture is that we become fearless, free, blessed, and affirmed. We live life as God intended. When this is our posture, when all we want, when we match God, when God has said, you are my treasure, when we look back at God and we say, yes, and you are my treasure, and all I want is to be with you just as you want to be with me, then when we adopt this posture, we become fearless, free, blessed, and affirmed. And I choose those words very intentionally because they're the antithesis of all the other postures. And life under God, that's a posture of fear. God, all these things are out of my control. I'm really scared. Will you control the universe for me and I'll control how much I submit to you? And when we live life with God, what we see is that eternity is God's presence in heaven and eternity has already begun for his believers that we started this new life in this new body that we know God, we are reconciled with him. And in that way, heaven has been brought down to us, brought down to us by God so that we can begin to experience pieces of it now as we enjoy his presence. And we have to no longer fear death because Jesus conquered it for us. That's why the scriptures say that death has lost its sting. We have to no longer, the greatest fear any of us have in life, God has removed that from us when we live life with him. And the life over God policy, the thing that we, or posture, the thing that we fear the most is that God will be in control of us, that we won't be able to do what we want to do. I don't want your authority in my life because there's joys over here that I want to experience that I don't feel like I can if I'm submitted to you. And what we find when we live life with God is that he came to give us life to the full, that as David said, at his right hand there are pleasures forevermore. There is no greater life than to be walking in lockstep with the Father, than to walk with him in the cool of the evening. And in that place, we find total and complete freedom to be exactly who he created us to be. We are everything that God ever intended when we walk with him. So we no longer need that posture. We are blessed. If you were here a couple of weeks ago, you heard Doug's, I thought, brilliant illustration of the kid who asked for a horse and his parents brought them back a car instead. He asked for a horse. They were supposed to get a horse when he became of age, but by the time he became of age, cars had been invented. So his parents gave him a car because it fit the bill of what he was asking for and was so much beyond what he could ever imagine. And he painted this great picture of in our life we ask for so many horses. We want so many simple things, and God sees beyond those so much and blesses us beyond what we could ever ask or imagine, as it says in Ephesians. And when we walk this life with God, we are blessed in ways that we could have never had the audacity to ask for. And we are affirmed. In the life for God posture, we perform so that God will love us, so that our peers will respect us, because everyone needs to be valued. Everybody needs to be told that they're loved, that I see you, and I love you, and that you're enough. And in life with God, when we're with God, when we're just with our Father and we're just basking in his presence, there is that constant voice of affirmation in our life that you are loved and I love you and you are enough. The life with God posture is the antithesis of all the others. And it's the way that we live life finally and fully as God intended. And so to me, the question becomes, okay, that's what God wants. I see it over the whole narrative arc of Scripture. I see it as the antithesis of all the others. It's the answer to them. How do I adopt this posture in my life? How do I do that? How do I practically live life with God? Again, I think it's worth diving into the book where he has four chapters to unpack what I'm going to try to distill down into eight minutes for you. But the first thing that I would say is this. We adopt this posture when we understand that the gospel is not a way to get people to heaven, it's a way to get people to God. I'll say it again. The gospel is not a way to get people to heaven. It is a way to get people to God. That's not my thought. That's John Piper's thought. He's smarter than me. I stole it. I think so often we think about being saved. We think that Jesus died to get us to heaven. And when we think about heaven, we think about getting to see our lost loved ones, the people that we're going to be reunited with. We think about the sweet mansion on the streets of gold and how awesome it's going to be in this perfect utopia for all of eternity. And that's great. That's what heaven is. But Jesus didn't die to get us to heaven. He died to get us to God. To reconcile our relationship with him. Because in heaven, the first strokes God paints in the picture are that he will be with us. We will see the face of our God. We will see the love in his eyes. We will see our Savior Jesus and hear his voice for the first time. We will see the presence of the Spirit that's been guiding us as we've stumbled and tripped and fall through life. That is what Jesus died for. To get us to God. Heaven is secondary. That just happens to be where God is. He died to reunite us with him and with the Father and with the Spirit. And a good litmus test for whether or not we think about it like this is when you think about heaven, when you think about getting to be there, who are you most excited to see? Are you most excited to see a lost loved one? Or are you most excited to see the face of your Father God? Are you most excited to be reunited with someone you lost? Or are you most excited to finally get to see the face of Jesus and hear his voice? Now listen, I know that's a terribly unfair question. It's manipulative and mean. I get it. When I think about that, I think about my papa. I loved him as much as you can love anybody. He was my hero growing up. He died when I was 19. I really want him to meet Lily. I really want him to hear me preach. And I can't wait to hug him. And you have the people that you love too. And unfortunately, the older you get, the greater the population of people you want to see is in heaven. But I'm telling you, if what we long for most is to see the people we already know and not meet the God who created us, then we're not quite in a place yet where God has become our treasure. And so if we want to adopt this life with God posture and yearn for the proper things and see the gospel as a way to get to God and treasure what that is, I think the only way to do that is to know him more. I think the only way for our value of God to grow is to know him more, to learn him more, to pursue him more, to engage in the things that he wants us to engage in, to wake up daily. You've heard me say over and over again, the most important thing we can do in our lives is to wake up every day and spend time in God's word and time in prayer. We've got to pursue him through his word and not just read it as a way to learn about God, but a way to learn who God is. The highest goal that we could have in our lives is to know God. Because the more we know him, the more we want to be with him, and the more accurately we see what the gospel is, and the more fervently we live our life for him, the more we want to be with him. I think that this is why Paul prays in Ephesians, the prayer that I've shared with you so many times. We've made this the prayer of grace. This was the prayer of Paul over his churches. I love this prayer so much that Jen's cousin, who's a calligrapher, I had her write it out. And we're in the process of getting it framed and putting it in our living room so that my family can see it every day. And this is what Paul prays for us in that prayer. I'm going to skip down to verse 17 of Ephesians chapter 3. He writes, he starts us off, for this reason I bow my knees before the Father. But then he says in 17, so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith, that you being rooted and grounded in love may have the strength to comprehend with all the saints what is the breadth and length and height and depth and to know the love of Christ that surpasses knowledge that you may be filled with all the fullness of God. Paul's chief desire for his churches was that they would know God. My chief desire for you is that you would know God. Not that life would go well, not that we would be protected, not that we would be prosperous, not that we would make money, not that we would get the job or have the relationship or dodge that pain or be able to dance through the raindrops of tragedy in our life. That's not Paul's prayer for us. Paul's prayer for us is that we would know God. And in knowing him, he becomes more lovely to us. And in becoming more lovely for us, our hearts and our souls yearn for the proper eternity. If heaven sounds boring to you, you just don't have a very good picture of who God is. Part of that's your pastor's fault. The first thing we do to adopt this posture is we understand that Jesus died to get us to God. Heaven just happens to be where he is. The second thing that we do, and I love this on a practical level for us, and I really want you guys to think about this. The second thing we can do to adopt this posture is we adopt this posture when prayer grows from communication to communion. We adopt this posture when our idea and practice of prayer grows from communication to communion. When we first start to think about prayer, when we first encounter it, when we're a child or when we get saved or when we become interested in it, whenever it might be, I think the very first thing we learn about prayer is that it's our opportunity to talk to God. When the disciples asked Jesus how to pray, he said, pray like this, and he talked to God. And so the first way we encounter prayer is to think of it as speaking to God. It's this communication from us to the Father. And then once you study prayer a little bit longer, once you read more scripture, once you're around church a little bit more and you get to know the Lord a little bit better, you understand that you can listen when you pray. That sometimes being prayerful is to be silent before God and to simply listen to him. So now he's communicating with you. But in scripture, there is this deeper prayer. In life, there is this deeper prayer that's simply communion with God. It's this prayer that helps us to pray without ceasing, as we are commanded to do. It's this communing prayer that allows us to be in the presence of God. It's this communing prayer that allows us to pray as we go through our days and through our weeks, even while we're in meetings and conversations with other people. This idea of communing prayer. It's captured in the book by a conversation between Dan Rather and Mother Teresa that I really loved. Dan Rather's talking to Mother Teresa and he says, you know, I hear that you're really renowned for your prayers. So when you pray, what do you say to God? Mother Teresa says, oh, I don't say anything. I just listen. So Dan Rather says, okay. Well then, while you're listening, what does God say to you? And she says, oh, he doesn't say anything. He's just listening. And if you don't understand that, I don't know how to explain it to you. That's a different way to think about prayer. Communing with God. And you know, I hesitated on what to say here and whether or not to share this. Because this is a little wispy. And some of you, I know, I will lose you. And you will think, Nate's a weird hippie. I don't know if I can go to this church anymore. But if we were just friends, I'm friends with most of you. If you and I had the chance to sit down over a drink and talk about prayer, and I'm just talking to my friend, and we got to talk about this, and we said, what, like, this communing prayer, like, what are you talking about? Like, how does that even work? I would tell you this, because this is something that I've been thinking about for a long time. And I have books that lend themselves to this that are good traditional books. I'll be happy to email them to you if you want to know. I think there is something to meditative prayer. I think there's something to meditation. I think in our Western culture, we don't have time for that. We don't have interest in that. We don't have value for that. That's something for weird Eastern cultures. But I think we shortchange ourselves a lot when we just cast that aside. And I would even go as far to say this to my friend over drinks. I think that the other world religions and cultures that have figured out the value of meditation are groping and mimicking the meditation, the prayerful meditation that God intended us to have. I think the reason that they do it is because they're on to something and there is a peace that's found there and that God intended us to find that peace there because for a Christian, he's intended us to find him there. I think there's absolutely something to meditative contemplative prayer where we simply listen and we are simply with God. And if you think about it, how else are we going to crawl up in his lap and be still? I said my favorite times with Lily are the times when I get to hold her and we're quiet together. How else do we do that with our God who is in heaven than to simply be quiet in his presence? And you think to yourself, that's great. How do I do that? How do I just start contemplative prayer? I would say it works like anything else that we try for the first time. This last year and a half or so, I've gotten into cooking. I just like cooking. And now if you want to cook, you don't need a cookbook. You just need YouTube. And so like you just watch videos. And one of the things that I've wanted to learn to cook is the perfect steak. I've gone nuts with this. I talk with my friends about it all the time. It's probably a sin in my life by this point because I think about it so much. But I want to cook the perfect steak. And you can watch all the YouTube videos you want to watch. You can watch all the TikTok chefs you want to watch. But until you fire up the stove and put the pan on it and heat it up and hear the sizzle when the steak goes in and learn what it is when you do this and when you do this, what happens when you dry it and you don't dry it, what happens when it's not hot enough or when it's too hot? What happens when you don't put enough oil in or you need more butter or whatever it is? Until you start to do it, there's no way you can understand it. You can learn all you want about how to cook a steak, but nothing is going to teach you like experience. And when you start to do it, some things start to click and fire off. And I believe that this contemplative prayer works the same way. We can learn all about it. We can read the books. We can think about how we might want to try to do it. But all I can tell you to do is start trying. Spend some time with God. Read His Word. Spend some time in the Bible. Pursue him. Desire him. Let him paint a picture of himself in your life. And then set the Bible down and sit quietly with him for as long as you can stand. Don't worry about how long it takes. Just do it. Just sit down and do it, and then when you can't do it anymore, stop doing it. Who cares how long you did it? And sit in the presence of God. And if you're really thinking along with me, if you're really engaged, you may be thinking to yourself, Nate, did you really just take the church through a book and five weeks worth of sermons so that you could arrive at the conclusion that if we really want to live the life that God wants for us and experience the relationship with God that he intended us to have, that what we need to do is read the Bible and pray more? Yeah, I did. Because it's that simple. Because that's what God wants from us. He wants us to be with him. I hope you will. I hope you will intentionally pursue the presence of the Father this week. And I hope that he begins to open doors of understanding for you that you didn't have previously. And I hope that he will slowly but surely, as we develop a larger picture of him, as we pursue him, I hope that he will become our treasure. And that we will begin to view the gospel as a way to get to God and to Jesus. And not just a way to heaven. Let's pray and then we get to do communion together. Father, we love you. We are grateful for you. And to you. Lord, would you open our hearts and our eyes and our minds to what a relationship with you can look like? Would you help us mine scripture for who you are and listen to books and read podcasts and have conversations? Give us time, God, to get out in your creation and simply soak you in in silence. Help us enjoy the rain this afternoon as it pours. May we find a time to go outside in the quiet and just listen to your sovereignty pour down on us and enjoy your presence there. Help us to pursue you through prayer, to see it as communion with you and not reduce it to communication. God, may we as a church live our lives with you and acknowledge that's all you've ever really wanted. Let us experience your presence even today, Father. It's in your son's name we pray. Amen.

My name is Nate. I am one of the pastors here. As a pastor, it often falls on me to offer counsel and advice to people. Believe it or not, sometimes people will call the church and ask to talk to a pastor or ask to talk to me or even seek me out individually knowing full well who I am, and they will still ask me for advice on things or what to do in certain situations. And for a long time in those situations at my old church, it was a larger church in the Atlanta area, about 2,000 people. If you called that church, you got funneled to me. I was the one that you would talk to. It was a really talentless staff. So that was my role. And for a long time, my advice in those situations would pretty much default to suck it up. Like, get it together. Quit being a sissy. Let's go. Like, you just got to face the music. You got to stand up. You got to stick your chin out, and you got to take it. And I came by that advice honestly, because for a long time, that's what worked for me. Part of my story is that when I was younger, I was bullied pretty badly. For a couple years, elementary school and then in middle school, there was two kids in my neighborhood who just delighted in tormenting me. And I won't get into all the details of it, but one of the things they would do, just to give you a picture of what fifth grade looked like for Nate, is they were in middle school, so they got home before me. They would hide in the bushes at the bus stop and have an industrial strength rubber band, and they had sniffed it. So it was one big long rubber band, and then when I would get off the bus, they would pop me in the ears and in the neck and in the legs until I would cry or run, and then they would call me names. That was like most days. So we started diversion tactics. I got a letter to get off the bus at other bus stops. My mom would come pick me up at school sometimes, but that was a part of my life, and that was a part of my life for a couple of years. And at some point or another, as a kid, I just realized I can't care so much what they think about me. They would invite me over to play and I'd be like, oh good, we're friends now. And then I would get there and they would just make fun of me until I would go home. And it taught me to have a thick skin. It taught me to not let it affect me when other people pick on me. It taught me to be tough. And at some point in my adolescence, I decided I'm tired of them having this kind of control over me. I'm just going to tough it up. I'm just going to suck it up and figure out how to not care what they think. And that's what I did. And so in adulthood, when an issue came up, my thought was, suck it up. Just don't be a baby. That's what I did. Worked for me. Let's go. And that's kind of the mindset I had several years ago when I got one of those phone calls at the church that I was at. Some guy called the church and just said he was in a real tough way, needed to talk to a pastor. So pick up the phone. Hey, you know, one of the pastors here, what's going on? How can I help you? And he was 31 years old, and he had a girlfriend who had a bit of a drug issue, in his words, and she had just broken up with him. Nobody in his family liked him, liked her, but he was crestfallen over this breakup. And he wanted to know from a pastor, if there is a good God in heaven, how could he allow this girl to break my heart in this way? And I thought, are you freaking kidding me? Like, you're 31. She broke up with you. She's a drug addict. This is a good thing, dude. Get another girlfriend. There's a lot of them. Like, I could not muster any sympathy for this dude. In my life, there was a good friend of mine who had just lost her husband, and I'm comparing and contrasting these tragedies, and I'm like, bro, suck it up. Like take a day, you know, have a beer and then get back to it. It doesn't matter. Like I literally, I was nice to him. I wasn't mean. I had the hardest time caring about this guy's issue. Like the girl broke up with you, man, whatever whatever. And so a couple days after that, I had lunch with a counselor. Every now and again, a counselor will reach out to a pastor and invite you to lunch, and they're basically, they're kind of courting your reference. You want to get to know each other, and they know that I kind of funnel people into counseling, and so that's kind of how that goes. And so we went out to lunch, and we were talking, and I said, hey hey man, let me just ask you a question. So I have to counsel sometimes. Let me get a little bit of advice. I got this call the other day. How would you have handled that? And I told him about the guy's issues and my response. And he kind of thought about it a second and he said, I'm guessing that you grew up in a pretty good home. And I said, I mean, yeah, I did. I'm guessing that you grew up in a pretty good home. And I said, well, I mean, yeah, I did. I'm guessing that your parents are together and that you never really had to wonder if they were proud of you. And I said, that's true of me. Yeah, I would say that's true. I said, how'd you know that? And he said, it's just, you just kind of get a sense. I can just tell by the way you carry yourself. He said, I'd be willing to bet that that guy you talked to on the phone probably doesn't have a background like you. He probably doesn't have that family structure to lean on like you did. And he probably values the relationship with that girl and what it did for him and the value that it made him feel a lot more than you ever would. So your ability to detach yourself from that and move on is not the same as his. So I would probably handle that with a little bit more empathy. And I thought, whoa, this dude is smart. I'm going to give him all the referrals. How did he figure that out in 20 minutes of talking to me? I was super impressed. And it also dawned on me in that conversation, because I'm obtuse,ations are always a little bit more nuanced than they seem. And that most of the time when we're talking about issues of mental and emotional health, suck it up is really bad advice. It's really careless and thoughtless and obtuse. And since then, I've rethought about the way that I offer counsel. And that really got my wheels turning on mental health in general. It's something that I care about a lot. I care deeply about how the church engages it because I think historically the church has engaged mental health a little bit like I did. Suck it up and pray it away. Let's go. You're not a good enough Christian. If you were a better Christian, you wouldn't be so sad. So let's lean into God and let's quit being a sissy. And I just think historically that's how we've handled it and that's obtuse. That's not helpful. And more and more, it's being pressed into the national conscience. Last year, we had several athletes come out and say that they were struggling with anxiety, that they were struggling with depression. There was a very high-profile rookie in the NBA who had a terrible rookie year, and he confessed that it was because he struggles greatly with anxiety. There was an offensive lineman, a big, huge bear of a man for the Philadelphia Eagles, I believe, who missed a half of football because he was in the locker room at halftime throwing up because of anxiety attacks and could not get himself out on the field. So more and more we become aware of these things. Every time there's a shooting, then mental health and the epidemic gets thrust into the national conscience. And so as we approached this series and we said, I want a better life, and we thought through the four things that we were going to talk about, I just kind of felt like, based on all of those things, my experiences and what's going on in our culture now, that it would be good to take a Sunday and say, hey, you know what? I want a better me. I want to be more healthy. And so I wanted to take a Sunday and talk to those of you who do struggle with some sort of mental or emotional struggle. I wanted to talk to us as a church, as we encounter and engage and love people in our life who are walking through that struggle. And so as I prepared and thought through what I wanted to say and how I wanted to approach it, I actually had a conversation with my therapist. I started seeing a therapist this last summer. And normally when I tell people that I'm in counseling, I immediately tell them why I'm in counseling because I don't want them to think that I'm broken or crazy or that there's something going on. So I want to be very clear, but it's for this really good reason. But as I prepared for this sermon, I thought, I'm going to quit doing that. Because what do I care what you think about how I go to counseling? We need to destigmatize it anyways. So I had a conversation with my therapist. And he's a believer. And he's got a master's in divinity. And so he's very helpful for me. And I said, hey, man, I'm going to be doing a sermon on mental health. What does the church need to know about mental health? What do you wish pastors would say about it? And he said, well, you know, I don't really hear a lot of sermons on mental health, but the ones that I have heard tend to focus on unhealth and what that's like. And I just think that we do a disservice to the church when we don't paint a picture of what health is. So I would invest my time in that. That's interesting. How would you define health? And he defined it essentially this way. He said, a healthy person walks in a sense of security and worth. He said a healthy person, someone who's mentally and emotionally healthy and stable walks in a sense of security and worth. What he meant is, if we're going to be emotionally stable, if we're going to be mentally healthy, then we need to have a sense of security. We need to feel safe. We need to know that everything's going to be okay. If we're walking around in constant fear, a constant uncertainty, or like we've got our eyes covered and we don't know where our next step is going to go, that that's going to cause some mental instability. So we first need to feel secure, but we also need to feel valuable. We need to feel worth. We need to feel like we're enough. We need to feel like we're good enough for other people, that we have some intrinsic value. We need to understand that about ourselves and walk in an actualization and an acknowledgement of that value. So he said, to be healthy, we need to walk in a sense of security and worth. And then he said something that I thought was really interesting. He said that every person gets their boat rocked a little bit. Every person in their life, all of you, at some point or another, have had times where you felt unsafe and had times where you felt unworthy. We've all had our security compromised. We've all had the rug pulled out from under us. We've all felt like, no, this time it's not gonna be okay. And I think more predominantly in the American culture, we've all had times where we don't feel worthy. Some of us feel that pervasively right now. For some of us, the story of our life is this low simmering sense of unworthiness and lack of value and like we're not good enough. And all we've ever done is claw to show ourselves and the people around us that we are actually good enough. Everybody struggles at times to feel secure and to feel worthy. And what he said is, when that happens, healthy people develop healthy coping mechanisms to get themselves back on track. Unhealthy people develop unhealthy coping mechanisms to try to grope for that security and to try to grope for that value. We've seen these unhealthy coping mechanisms, right? Someone feels unsafe, their world feels crazy, and so they become hyper-controlling of their environment all the time. They become, their house has to be clean, and their house doesn't have to be clean because they like a clean house. Their house has to be clean because they've got to exert control over something. And that's not necessarily bad, but it can become unhealthy. Where we see this most is when people exhibit unhealthy coping mechanisms as we lurch for value. This is the girl that far too easily gives herself over to whatever guy will pay attention to her. Because from that guy, she is getting her sense of worth, and that's how she's coping and lurching for that. This is the grown man that still tells you how good of an athlete he was in high school. Because all he's saying is, tell me I'm valuable. Tell me I'm worthy. This is the guy that can't help but brag about whatever it was he did. It's not because he's dumb. It's because he's incredibly insecure and he's groping for value and he doesn't feel it. So he's just looking at you going, can you just tell me I'm awesome? Can you do that, please? He's a 15-year-old kid going, please tell me I'm great. We all do it. As we grow up, we find more nuanced ways to grope for this value, but we do, and it becomes unhealthy. This is where addictions start and get carried on, right? We feel unvaluable. We feel unworthy, we feel unsafe, and so we drink, we medicate, or we find a hobby to numb it, or we refuse to sit in silence. In my research, I saw a great quote from Blaise Pascal that said, all of man's problems can be summed up in his inability to sit in a quiet room alone. Some of us hate the silence. Some of us can't go more than 10 seconds without pulling out our phone to distract ourselves from the things that we don't want to think about. Unhealthy people develop unhealthy coping mechanisms to lurch for the security and the value that we all need. Healthy people develop unhealthy coping mechanisms to lurch for the security and the value that we all need. Healthy people develop healthy coping mechanisms to bring back and restore that sense of security and worth. And when we think about healthy coping mechanisms, I think this is a good place to insert the spiritual into the conversation as we think about what are some healthy coping mechanisms with a lack of stability or a lack of value that can bring me back to a place of true health. And as I had this conversation with my therapist, I suggested these two things. I said, I think God provides for us these senses in these two ways. And he said, yeah, that's not everything. And I just want to say very clearly, I'm not covering everything that we do and how we handle mental health this morning, but this is a very good start, I think. As we think about healthy coping mechanisms and what it means to be truly healthy, I want to suggest these two things to you, that there's really two pillars of true health. There's security in God's sovereignty and worthiness in God's love. If we want to be healthy people, truly healthy the way that we were designed, we have to walk in a sense of security anchored in God's sovereignty and a sense of worthiness brought about by God's deep and compassionate love for us. That's what true health is. And so a healthy coping mechanism is to acknowledge that God is sovereign, to acknowledge that God is in control, to acknowledge that nothing happens outside of his purview and outside of his will and feel the relief of that. A good coping mechanism is to look around at the people in your life that God has placed in your life who love you and who value you and who are telling you that you are enough and to allow that to be the truth that you hear and not the truth from the detractors. I actually think that these two pillars are some of the greatest things that Christianity has to offer. I think we undervalue the sovereignty of God. One of my favorite verses, group of verses, is Philippians 4, 6, and 7. Be anxious for nothing, but in everything, through prayer and petition and with thanksgiving, present your requests to God, and the God of peace who transcends all understanding will, listen, guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. Are you anxious? Are the things keeping you up at night? Does worry characterize you? Pray those things to God. Release them to God. And he says that his peace that passes all understanding will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. And what that means is God is saying, I've got it. I'm in control. I'm God. It's going to be okay. Rest easy in my sovereignty. He does this again in Romans 8, where it says, we know that for those who love him and are called according to his purpose, that all things work together for the good of those who love him. Everything works together for the good of those who love him are called according to his purpose. Romans 8.28 tells us everything's going to work out. Even if it doesn't work out now, it will work out eventually. It's a beautiful promise from God. I saw a clip of a pastor doing the funeral for his mother that he lost far too early. And he said some amazing things. He said, you know, with God, all of our prayers are answered. I was praying so much for my mom to live, and then she died. He said it disillusioned him for a little bit. But what he realized was he was thinking about it wrong. And it dawned on him that in God, all his prayers are answered because she knew Jesus. So as he prayed for his mom to live, the truth of it is either she's going to live or she was gonna live. She was gonna be okay or she was gonna be okay. She was gonna be with family or she was gonna go be with family. God is good or God is good. This is the sovereignty that he offers us. And one of my favorite passages that I mentioned often, Revelation 21, paints this beautiful picture where it says the end of days that we will be with God and he will be with his people and there will be no more weeping and no more crying and no more pain anymore for the former things have passed away. There is a sovereignty and a peace that God promises throughout scripture. Scripture is replete with these promises. And if we want to be healthy and cling onto a sense of stability and know that everything is okay, even when we don't see how it's going to be okay, then we cling to the sovereignty of God that is laced throughout Scripture, and we know that it's going to be okay, even if it doesn't make sense to me. And I believe that a healthy person reminds themselves of the sovereignty of God and rests easy in that and not in their own control. The next thing we do is we rest in God's love. We know the Bible tells us God loves us. We know John 3.16, for God so loved the world that he gave his only begotten son, that whoever believes in him would not perish but have eternal life. God tells us that not even a sparrow falls to the ground without his knowledge, so how much more does he care about you that the numbers of hairs on your head are numbered? He knows you that well and that intimately. He tells us that if your earthly father knows how to give you a good gift, how much better are my gifts? He tells us that we know that we are loved because while we were still sinners, he died for us. He tells us that we are able to love him because he first loved us. From God, if you listen, is a constant, pervasive, never fatiguing voice that says, you are enough. I love you. You do not have to perform for me. You don't have to be good for me. You don't have to sell for me. You don't have to execute for me. You don't have to impress me. I love you as much as I'm ever going to love you. And to be healthy is to walk in an acknowledgement of that love and not need the accolades of others and not be so desperate for the approval of this group because I'm walking with the approval of my God. And if you give me it too, that's great, but I don't need it because God gives it to me. That's what health looks like. Have you ever met somebody who is so comfortable in their own skin that you just marvel at it? To me, that's a person who walks knowing that God loves me and I'm good. That's what health is. So if we want to be a healthy person, we need to quiet the voices that are telling us we're not enough and listen to the pervasive and persistent voice of God that tells us that we are. As we think about ourselves pursuing mental and emotional health, I think the best, most practical way to do that is to pursue health. We need to identify poor coping mechanisms in our life and pursue healthy ones. If we're going to be mentally healthy, if we're in a state this morning where we feel given towards depression, if we feel given towards anxiety, if we feel given towards just unhealth, I think a good exercise is to identify the unhealthy coping mechanisms that exist in our life. And listen, we all have them. One of the things I'm more certain of than ever, especially in being in counseling, is that we are all a bundle and an alchemy of insecurities and coping mechanisms to present ourselves as enough, all of us. So the best thing we can do is try to identify where these coping mechanisms are and pursue them and pursue healthy ones. But I don't just want to talk about us, how we pursue health. I think one of the big questions the church faces and some of us in our life faces, if I have people in my life who are not healthy, how do I love them towards health? What can we do to love other people towards emotional and mental health? I think two things I would suggest to you this morning. The first would be to offer the empathetic compassion of Christ. To offer the empathetic compassion of Christ. Hebrews tells us that Christ took on flesh, that he bore our infirmities, that he was tempted in the ways that we are tempted, so that he understood our plight, so that when we pray to our Savior, we're not praying to someone who is altogether unfamiliar with the human condition. We're praying to someone who is empathetic with us and therefore compassionate towards us. Do you realize that empathy is the birthplace of compassion? That empathy begats compassion. That the thing that happened with me and that guy that called the church that day, I had zero empathy for him. Therefore, I had zero compassion. It made no sense to me how he was that broken up about that. I could not put myself in his shoes of caring that much that I would doubt the existence of God because a girl dumped me. And so I had no compassion for him. But when I had that conversation with the counselor, and I realized the nuances of what was going on in the conversation that I had with that guy, the thought occurred to me, you know what? If I didn't grow up the way that I grew up in the house that I grew up in, it's entirely possible that I would handle that situation just like he does. And that I'm not tough. I didn't just learn to suck it up. I'm just the benefit of a good environment with good coping mechanisms. And the truth of it is, if you think about me as a little kid, I said I learned to suck it up early. No, I didn't. No, I didn't. I didn't decide as a 12-year-old to get tough. No one gets tough at 12. I was in an environment where I was loved by family and by people at church. And that reminded me of my worthiness. My parents breathed scripture into me and that reminded me of God's sovereignty. And I begun to cling to those things. And I wouldn't have articulated it like this at the time, but all that happened is I had to simply develop healthy coping mechanisms for feeling unsafe and unworthy. And the guy that I was talking to on the phone that day had never had the opportunity to develop those. So the first thing we do with people who are experiencing unhealth is we offer empathy. And we acknowledge and admit that even if we don't understand, even if we've never felt that way before, if you change the alchemy of my life and you make the circumstances the same and you run me through the ringer that they went through, there's a very good chance I would come out the other side feeling and thinking and acting the same way that they do. So don't think that we're for a second better than them or more stable than them or tougher than them or stronger than them. We have a different background than they do. And when we can acknowledge that we would be the same person they are, that produces in us empathy. And out of that empathy comes compassion, where we realize some of the worst possible advice would be to suck it up or to pray it away, that we need to first be empathetic with them and understand. And empathy is also the acknowledgement that sometimes when people are dealing with a mental health issue, it's a chemical imbalance. They are sick. Looking at someone who is depressed and telling them to suck it up is like looking at someone with the flu and telling them to run a couple miles. It's useless advice. All it does is make you look dumb and then feel bad. We've got to offer empathy, which produces in us a Christ-like compassion. To help us offer empathy, I wanted to share with you some statistics that I found in the research that I've been doing. These are from the National Mental Health Institute, Institute of Mental Health. What I learned is that a quarter or 20% of U.S. citizens exhibit some symptoms of mental illness. Now, that's a wide brush. That's mild depression all the way to extreme schizophrenia, okay? But 20%, one in five of you, look down the row within two people and one of them is crazy, right? That's a lot. It affects a lot of us. Now, here's what I think is really interesting. It says that there's 22% of women and 15% of men deal with mental health issues. Now, here's what that doesn't mean, that men have it together more than women do. What it means is they're more honest than us and you're a stubborn jerk. That's what that means. You just can't admit that you're struggling. You just fold your arms and pretend like everything's okay. And it only gets worse because 26% of millennials of 18 to 25 say that they experienced some sort of mental illness or exhibit signs of that. Only 14% of ages 50 and older. Now listen, I don't think for a second that you people who are 50 and older in this room have just have life so figured out and all your coping skills so nailed that you're the healthiest bunch in the room. Listen, if you're a dude over 50 and you're like, I don't struggle with depression. Yes, you do. You're just stubborn. Listen, all of us at some point have experienced a season of melancholy. We all have. If you haven't, you're a psychopath or you're not paying attention. All of us experience anxiety in excessive ways. Everybody in this room has had a suicidal thought. Everybody. The difference with healthy and unhealthy is how we cope with those things. I also thought it was really interesting that 50% of adolescents show sign of a mental disorder. And if we understand that health is to walk in a sense of stability and worth, is it any wonder that half of our high school students have no idea how to cling on to stability and worth? We are all of us broken. We are all of us at times weak and in need of help. There is none of us in here who is singularly and individually strong and healthy. And we need to acknowledge that as we seek to offer empathy to others. The next thing we can do to love people towards health is to celebrate courageous choices. We need to start celebrating courageous choices. When somebody makes a decision to get help, when somebody makes a decision to be vulnerable and confess, we need to praise those things. We need to celebrate those things. We don't need to deride those things. I've talked a lot about counseling in this sermon. One of the things that breaks my heart is that counseling gets such a stigma that people, when you start talking about going to see a therapist or going to see a counselor, that we automatically think, man, only broken people do that. What's going on in your life? What can you not get together yourself? Why do you need help that you need to go talk to a professional to do that? Are you crazy? What's wrong with you? What have you failed at? How did you ruin your marriage? When did you get fired? We just assume that when people are going to see a therapist or going to see a counselor, that there's something broken in them. But here's the thing, there's something broken in all of us, so we need to stop it. Sometimes, most of the time, the unhealthy coping mechanisms that we have are so deeply embedded and ingrained in us that we can't see them. We don't know how to find them ourselves. And we need a trained professional to talk with us and help us see those and then help us see a way through them. We need trained professionals who are more than pastors. I'm very quick to go, listen, I wanna try to help you as best I can. I'm gonna pray for you. You need to talk to a therapist, not because you're crazy, but because they're good at it. The other thing I've learned is when you talk to somebody who will say, I should really go speak to a counselor about this. A lot of times they won't. And at first they won't because it's a pride thing. I don't want to do that. I don't want people to see me parking at that office. I don't want people to think that there's something wrong with me. I don't want people to think that I can't handle it or that I'm weak somehow. I don't want all the stuff that goes with seeing a counselor. So I'm not gonna go do that. And it seems like pride. But when you start to peel back the layers, what you find is that it's really fear. I'm convinced that the reason, if you're thinking about seeing a counselor, getting help, working through some unhealth in your life, I'm convinced that one of the big reasons we don't do that is because we know good and well what we're going to have to walk through when we get there. We don't want to have to look at ourselves in the mirror. It is easier to cope. It is easier to demur. It is easier to distract than it is to confront. And so we keep walking away from our unhealthy selves instead of turning and allowing someone to hold up a mirror and show us and work through it and walk through it and emerge on the other side more healthy. It's often fear that keeps us from getting help, not pride. And so I want you to know this morning that I think it takes bravery to go get help. And I actually think, and I would love for our church to start thinking about it this way, that counseling is not for the broken. It's for the brave. Counseling is not for broken people. It's for brave people. If it were for broken people, then we'd all be in it because we're all broken. But at some point or another, you have to take a step and make a decision that I want some help. I want to be healthy. I want somebody else's voice in this conversation helping me identify the unhealthy pockets in my life to restoring me to my God-given sense of security and value and love. And since I can't find my way out of this mess myself, I want to get someone else to speak into it for me. And that takes bravery and courage. The counseling is not the broken. It's for the brave. My prayer is that 2020 will be the healthiest year for you in a long, long time. For those of you who are brave enough to pursue health, I think it begins with acknowledging and identifying the unhealthy ways we bring ourselves a sense of security and worth. And doing the work to replace that coping mechanism with one that pushes us towards God's sovereignty and pushes us towards God's love. If we have people in our lives this year that we're trying to love towards mental health, we need to do it with empathy and compassion. And we need to, as a church and as a Christian subculture, destigmatize what it is to get help and admit that we all need it. And it's not for the broken, it's for the brave. I hope that some of you will make courageous choices, even this week. If you do want to talk to a counselor, email me and I'll work to find you a good one. I'm not going to send you to mine, but somebody. If there's someone in your life who is struggling, please, please offer them empathy. Please offer them compassion. Please offer them understanding. Try the best you can to put yourself in their shoes and love them from that perspective. And let's make this year a healthy year. Let's pray. Father, we do love you. We thank you so much for loving us. God, if there is anybody here who feels unworthy, who feels unvaluable, who feels unloved, God, may they just feel a pervasive sense of your love and your compassion wrapping around them today. Help them to hear the voices in their life that speak for you and tell them that they are enough. God, if we feel unsafe or insecure, I pray that you would restore that sense of security with your sovereignty. God, for those here who are struggling, who are sad, or who are anxious, or dealing with a multitude of other things, help them feel your peace today. Help them feel your hope today. Remind them that that hope, your word says, will not be put to shame. God, I pray that we would be healthy, that we would walk in a sense of security in you, of value in you, and that that would enable us to love other people well on your behalf. It's in your son's name we pray, amen.

My name is Nate. I am one of the pastors here. As a pastor, it often falls on me to offer counsel and advice to people. Believe it or not, sometimes people will call the church and ask to talk to a pastor or ask to talk to me or even seek me out individually knowing full well who I am, and they will still ask me for advice on things or what to do in certain situations. And for a long time in those situations at my old church, it was a larger church in the Atlanta area, about 2,000 people. If you called that church, you got funneled to me. I was the one that you would talk to. It was a really talentless staff. So that was my role. And for a long time, my advice in those situations would pretty much default to suck it up. Like, get it together. Quit being a sissy. Let's go. Like, you just got to face the music. You got to stand up. You got to stick your chin out, and you got to take it. And I came by that advice honestly, because for a long time, that's what worked for me. Part of my story is that when I was younger, I was bullied pretty badly. For a couple years, elementary school and then in middle school, there was two kids in my neighborhood who just delighted in tormenting me. And I won't get into all the details of it, but one of the things they would do, just to give you a picture of what fifth grade looked like for Nate, is they were in middle school, so they got home before me. They would hide in the bushes at the bus stop and have an industrial strength rubber band, and they had sniffed it. So it was one big long rubber band, and then when I would get off the bus, they would pop me in the ears and in the neck and in the legs until I would cry or run, and then they would call me names. That was like most days. So we started diversion tactics. I got a letter to get off the bus at other bus stops. My mom would come pick me up at school sometimes, but that was a part of my life, and that was a part of my life for a couple of years. And at some point or another, as a kid, I just realized I can't care so much what they think about me. They would invite me over to play and I'd be like, oh good, we're friends now. And then I would get there and they would just make fun of me until I would go home. And it taught me to have a thick skin. It taught me to not let it affect me when other people pick on me. It taught me to be tough. And at some point in my adolescence, I decided I'm tired of them having this kind of control over me. I'm just going to tough it up. I'm just going to suck it up and figure out how to not care what they think. And that's what I did. And so in adulthood, when an issue came up, my thought was, suck it up. Just don't be a baby. That's what I did. Worked for me. Let's go. And that's kind of the mindset I had several years ago when I got one of those phone calls at the church that I was at. Some guy called the church and just said he was in a real tough way, needed to talk to a pastor. So pick up the phone. Hey, you know, one of the pastors here, what's going on? How can I help you? And he was 31 years old, and he had a girlfriend who had a bit of a drug issue, in his words, and she had just broken up with him. Nobody in his family liked him, liked her, but he was crestfallen over this breakup. And he wanted to know from a pastor, if there is a good God in heaven, how could he allow this girl to break my heart in this way? And I thought, are you freaking kidding me? Like, you're 31. She broke up with you. She's a drug addict. This is a good thing, dude. Get another girlfriend. There's a lot of them. Like, I could not muster any sympathy for this dude. In my life, there was a good friend of mine who had just lost her husband, and I'm comparing and contrasting these tragedies, and I'm like, bro, suck it up. Like take a day, you know, have a beer and then get back to it. It doesn't matter. Like I literally, I was nice to him. I wasn't mean. I had the hardest time caring about this guy's issue. Like the girl broke up with you, man, whatever whatever. And so a couple days after that, I had lunch with a counselor. Every now and again, a counselor will reach out to a pastor and invite you to lunch, and they're basically, they're kind of courting your reference. You want to get to know each other, and they know that I kind of funnel people into counseling, and so that's kind of how that goes. And so we went out to lunch, and we were talking, and I said, hey hey man, let me just ask you a question. So I have to counsel sometimes. Let me get a little bit of advice. I got this call the other day. How would you have handled that? And I told him about the guy's issues and my response. And he kind of thought about it a second and he said, I'm guessing that you grew up in a pretty good home. And I said, I mean, yeah, I did. I'm guessing that you grew up in a pretty good home. And I said, well, I mean, yeah, I did. I'm guessing that your parents are together and that you never really had to wonder if they were proud of you. And I said, that's true of me. Yeah, I would say that's true. I said, how'd you know that? And he said, it's just, you just kind of get a sense. I can just tell by the way you carry yourself. He said, I'd be willing to bet that that guy you talked to on the phone probably doesn't have a background like you. He probably doesn't have that family structure to lean on like you did. And he probably values the relationship with that girl and what it did for him and the value that it made him feel a lot more than you ever would. So your ability to detach yourself from that and move on is not the same as his. So I would probably handle that with a little bit more empathy. And I thought, whoa, this dude is smart. I'm going to give him all the referrals. How did he figure that out in 20 minutes of talking to me? I was super impressed. And it also dawned on me in that conversation, because I'm obtuse,ations are always a little bit more nuanced than they seem. And that most of the time when we're talking about issues of mental and emotional health, suck it up is really bad advice. It's really careless and thoughtless and obtuse. And since then, I've rethought about the way that I offer counsel. And that really got my wheels turning on mental health in general. It's something that I care about a lot. I care deeply about how the church engages it because I think historically the church has engaged mental health a little bit like I did. Suck it up and pray it away. Let's go. You're not a good enough Christian. If you were a better Christian, you wouldn't be so sad. So let's lean into God and let's quit being a sissy. And I just think historically that's how we've handled it and that's obtuse. That's not helpful. And more and more, it's being pressed into the national conscience. Last year, we had several athletes come out and say that they were struggling with anxiety, that they were struggling with depression. There was a very high-profile rookie in the NBA who had a terrible rookie year, and he confessed that it was because he struggles greatly with anxiety. There was an offensive lineman, a big, huge bear of a man for the Philadelphia Eagles, I believe, who missed a half of football because he was in the locker room at halftime throwing up because of anxiety attacks and could not get himself out on the field. So more and more we become aware of these things. Every time there's a shooting, then mental health and the epidemic gets thrust into the national conscience. And so as we approached this series and we said, I want a better life, and we thought through the four things that we were going to talk about, I just kind of felt like, based on all of those things, my experiences and what's going on in our culture now, that it would be good to take a Sunday and say, hey, you know what? I want a better me. I want to be more healthy. And so I wanted to take a Sunday and talk to those of you who do struggle with some sort of mental or emotional struggle. I wanted to talk to us as a church, as we encounter and engage and love people in our life who are walking through that struggle. And so as I prepared and thought through what I wanted to say and how I wanted to approach it, I actually had a conversation with my therapist. I started seeing a therapist this last summer. And normally when I tell people that I'm in counseling, I immediately tell them why I'm in counseling because I don't want them to think that I'm broken or crazy or that there's something going on. So I want to be very clear, but it's for this really good reason. But as I prepared for this sermon, I thought, I'm going to quit doing that. Because what do I care what you think about how I go to counseling? We need to destigmatize it anyways. So I had a conversation with my therapist. And he's a believer. And he's got a master's in divinity. And so he's very helpful for me. And I said, hey, man, I'm going to be doing a sermon on mental health. What does the church need to know about mental health? What do you wish pastors would say about it? And he said, well, you know, I don't really hear a lot of sermons on mental health, but the ones that I have heard tend to focus on unhealth and what that's like. And I just think that we do a disservice to the church when we don't paint a picture of what health is. So I would invest my time in that. That's interesting. How would you define health? And he defined it essentially this way. He said, a healthy person walks in a sense of security and worth. He said a healthy person, someone who's mentally and emotionally healthy and stable walks in a sense of security and worth. What he meant is, if we're going to be emotionally stable, if we're going to be mentally healthy, then we need to have a sense of security. We need to feel safe. We need to know that everything's going to be okay. If we're walking around in constant fear, a constant uncertainty, or like we've got our eyes covered and we don't know where our next step is going to go, that that's going to cause some mental instability. So we first need to feel secure, but we also need to feel valuable. We need to feel worth. We need to feel like we're enough. We need to feel like we're good enough for other people, that we have some intrinsic value. We need to understand that about ourselves and walk in an actualization and an acknowledgement of that value. So he said, to be healthy, we need to walk in a sense of security and worth. And then he said something that I thought was really interesting. He said that every person gets their boat rocked a little bit. Every person in their life, all of you, at some point or another, have had times where you felt unsafe and had times where you felt unworthy. We've all had our security compromised. We've all had the rug pulled out from under us. We've all felt like, no, this time it's not gonna be okay. And I think more predominantly in the American culture, we've all had times where we don't feel worthy. Some of us feel that pervasively right now. For some of us, the story of our life is this low simmering sense of unworthiness and lack of value and like we're not good enough. And all we've ever done is claw to show ourselves and the people around us that we are actually good enough. Everybody struggles at times to feel secure and to feel worthy. And what he said is, when that happens, healthy people develop healthy coping mechanisms to get themselves back on track. Unhealthy people develop unhealthy coping mechanisms to try to grope for that security and to try to grope for that value. We've seen these unhealthy coping mechanisms, right? Someone feels unsafe, their world feels crazy, and so they become hyper-controlling of their environment all the time. They become, their house has to be clean, and their house doesn't have to be clean because they like a clean house. Their house has to be clean because they've got to exert control over something. And that's not necessarily bad, but it can become unhealthy. Where we see this most is when people exhibit unhealthy coping mechanisms as we lurch for value. This is the girl that far too easily gives herself over to whatever guy will pay attention to her. Because from that guy, she is getting her sense of worth, and that's how she's coping and lurching for that. This is the grown man that still tells you how good of an athlete he was in high school. Because all he's saying is, tell me I'm valuable. Tell me I'm worthy. This is the guy that can't help but brag about whatever it was he did. It's not because he's dumb. It's because he's incredibly insecure and he's groping for value and he doesn't feel it. So he's just looking at you going, can you just tell me I'm awesome? Can you do that, please? He's a 15-year-old kid going, please tell me I'm great. We all do it. As we grow up, we find more nuanced ways to grope for this value, but we do, and it becomes unhealthy. This is where addictions start and get carried on, right? We feel unvaluable. We feel unworthy, we feel unsafe, and so we drink, we medicate, or we find a hobby to numb it, or we refuse to sit in silence. In my research, I saw a great quote from Blaise Pascal that said, all of man's problems can be summed up in his inability to sit in a quiet room alone. Some of us hate the silence. Some of us can't go more than 10 seconds without pulling out our phone to distract ourselves from the things that we don't want to think about. Unhealthy people develop unhealthy coping mechanisms to lurch for the security and the value that we all need. Healthy people develop unhealthy coping mechanisms to lurch for the security and the value that we all need. Healthy people develop healthy coping mechanisms to bring back and restore that sense of security and worth. And when we think about healthy coping mechanisms, I think this is a good place to insert the spiritual into the conversation as we think about what are some healthy coping mechanisms with a lack of stability or a lack of value that can bring me back to a place of true health. And as I had this conversation with my therapist, I suggested these two things. I said, I think God provides for us these senses in these two ways. And he said, yeah, that's not everything. And I just want to say very clearly, I'm not covering everything that we do and how we handle mental health this morning, but this is a very good start, I think. As we think about healthy coping mechanisms and what it means to be truly healthy, I want to suggest these two things to you, that there's really two pillars of true health. There's security in God's sovereignty and worthiness in God's love. If we want to be healthy people, truly healthy the way that we were designed, we have to walk in a sense of security anchored in God's sovereignty and a sense of worthiness brought about by God's deep and compassionate love for us. That's what true health is. And so a healthy coping mechanism is to acknowledge that God is sovereign, to acknowledge that God is in control, to acknowledge that nothing happens outside of his purview and outside of his will and feel the relief of that. A good coping mechanism is to look around at the people in your life that God has placed in your life who love you and who value you and who are telling you that you are enough and to allow that to be the truth that you hear and not the truth from the detractors. I actually think that these two pillars are some of the greatest things that Christianity has to offer. I think we undervalue the sovereignty of God. One of my favorite verses, group of verses, is Philippians 4, 6, and 7. Be anxious for nothing, but in everything, through prayer and petition and with thanksgiving, present your requests to God, and the God of peace who transcends all understanding will, listen, guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. Are you anxious? Are the things keeping you up at night? Does worry characterize you? Pray those things to God. Release them to God. And he says that his peace that passes all understanding will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. And what that means is God is saying, I've got it. I'm in control. I'm God. It's going to be okay. Rest easy in my sovereignty. He does this again in Romans 8, where it says, we know that for those who love him and are called according to his purpose, that all things work together for the good of those who love him. Everything works together for the good of those who love him are called according to his purpose. Romans 8.28 tells us everything's going to work out. Even if it doesn't work out now, it will work out eventually. It's a beautiful promise from God. I saw a clip of a pastor doing the funeral for his mother that he lost far too early. And he said some amazing things. He said, you know, with God, all of our prayers are answered. I was praying so much for my mom to live, and then she died. He said it disillusioned him for a little bit. But what he realized was he was thinking about it wrong. And it dawned on him that in God, all his prayers are answered because she knew Jesus. So as he prayed for his mom to live, the truth of it is either she's going to live or she was gonna live. She was gonna be okay or she was gonna be okay. She was gonna be with family or she was gonna go be with family. God is good or God is good. This is the sovereignty that he offers us. And one of my favorite passages that I mentioned often, Revelation 21, paints this beautiful picture where it says the end of days that we will be with God and he will be with his people and there will be no more weeping and no more crying and no more pain anymore for the former things have passed away. There is a sovereignty and a peace that God promises throughout scripture. Scripture is replete with these promises. And if we want to be healthy and cling onto a sense of stability and know that everything is okay, even when we don't see how it's going to be okay, then we cling to the sovereignty of God that is laced throughout Scripture, and we know that it's going to be okay, even if it doesn't make sense to me. And I believe that a healthy person reminds themselves of the sovereignty of God and rests easy in that and not in their own control. The next thing we do is we rest in God's love. We know the Bible tells us God loves us. We know John 3.16, for God so loved the world that he gave his only begotten son, that whoever believes in him would not perish but have eternal life. God tells us that not even a sparrow falls to the ground without his knowledge, so how much more does he care about you that the numbers of hairs on your head are numbered? He knows you that well and that intimately. He tells us that if your earthly father knows how to give you a good gift, how much better are my gifts? He tells us that we know that we are loved because while we were still sinners, he died for us. He tells us that we are able to love him because he first loved us. From God, if you listen, is a constant, pervasive, never fatiguing voice that says, you are enough. I love you. You do not have to perform for me. You don't have to be good for me. You don't have to sell for me. You don't have to execute for me. You don't have to impress me. I love you as much as I'm ever going to love you. And to be healthy is to walk in an acknowledgement of that love and not need the accolades of others and not be so desperate for the approval of this group because I'm walking with the approval of my God. And if you give me it too, that's great, but I don't need it because God gives it to me. That's what health looks like. Have you ever met somebody who is so comfortable in their own skin that you just marvel at it? To me, that's a person who walks knowing that God loves me and I'm good. That's what health is. So if we want to be a healthy person, we need to quiet the voices that are telling us we're not enough and listen to the pervasive and persistent voice of God that tells us that we are. As we think about ourselves pursuing mental and emotional health, I think the best, most practical way to do that is to pursue health. We need to identify poor coping mechanisms in our life and pursue healthy ones. If we're going to be mentally healthy, if we're in a state this morning where we feel given towards depression, if we feel given towards anxiety, if we feel given towards just unhealth, I think a good exercise is to identify the unhealthy coping mechanisms that exist in our life. And listen, we all have them. One of the things I'm more certain of than ever, especially in being in counseling, is that we are all a bundle and an alchemy of insecurities and coping mechanisms to present ourselves as enough, all of us. So the best thing we can do is try to identify where these coping mechanisms are and pursue them and pursue healthy ones. But I don't just want to talk about us, how we pursue health. I think one of the big questions the church faces and some of us in our life faces, if I have people in my life who are not healthy, how do I love them towards health? What can we do to love other people towards emotional and mental health? I think two things I would suggest to you this morning. The first would be to offer the empathetic compassion of Christ. To offer the empathetic compassion of Christ. Hebrews tells us that Christ took on flesh, that he bore our infirmities, that he was tempted in the ways that we are tempted, so that he understood our plight, so that when we pray to our Savior, we're not praying to someone who is altogether unfamiliar with the human condition. We're praying to someone who is empathetic with us and therefore compassionate towards us. Do you realize that empathy is the birthplace of compassion? That empathy begats compassion. That the thing that happened with me and that guy that called the church that day, I had zero empathy for him. Therefore, I had zero compassion. It made no sense to me how he was that broken up about that. I could not put myself in his shoes of caring that much that I would doubt the existence of God because a girl dumped me. And so I had no compassion for him. But when I had that conversation with the counselor, and I realized the nuances of what was going on in the conversation that I had with that guy, the thought occurred to me, you know what? If I didn't grow up the way that I grew up in the house that I grew up in, it's entirely possible that I would handle that situation just like he does. And that I'm not tough. I didn't just learn to suck it up. I'm just the benefit of a good environment with good coping mechanisms. And the truth of it is, if you think about me as a little kid, I said I learned to suck it up early. No, I didn't. No, I didn't. I didn't decide as a 12-year-old to get tough. No one gets tough at 12. I was in an environment where I was loved by family and by people at church. And that reminded me of my worthiness. My parents breathed scripture into me and that reminded me of God's sovereignty. And I begun to cling to those things. And I wouldn't have articulated it like this at the time, but all that happened is I had to simply develop healthy coping mechanisms for feeling unsafe and unworthy. And the guy that I was talking to on the phone that day had never had the opportunity to develop those. So the first thing we do with people who are experiencing unhealth is we offer empathy. And we acknowledge and admit that even if we don't understand, even if we've never felt that way before, if you change the alchemy of my life and you make the circumstances the same and you run me through the ringer that they went through, there's a very good chance I would come out the other side feeling and thinking and acting the same way that they do. So don't think that we're for a second better than them or more stable than them or tougher than them or stronger than them. We have a different background than they do. And when we can acknowledge that we would be the same person they are, that produces in us empathy. And out of that empathy comes compassion, where we realize some of the worst possible advice would be to suck it up or to pray it away, that we need to first be empathetic with them and understand. And empathy is also the acknowledgement that sometimes when people are dealing with a mental health issue, it's a chemical imbalance. They are sick. Looking at someone who is depressed and telling them to suck it up is like looking at someone with the flu and telling them to run a couple miles. It's useless advice. All it does is make you look dumb and then feel bad. We've got to offer empathy, which produces in us a Christ-like compassion. To help us offer empathy, I wanted to share with you some statistics that I found in the research that I've been doing. These are from the National Mental Health Institute, Institute of Mental Health. What I learned is that a quarter or 20% of U.S. citizens exhibit some symptoms of mental illness. Now, that's a wide brush. That's mild depression all the way to extreme schizophrenia, okay? But 20%, one in five of you, look down the row within two people and one of them is crazy, right? That's a lot. It affects a lot of us. Now, here's what I think is really interesting. It says that there's 22% of women and 15% of men deal with mental health issues. Now, here's what that doesn't mean, that men have it together more than women do. What it means is they're more honest than us and you're a stubborn jerk. That's what that means. You just can't admit that you're struggling. You just fold your arms and pretend like everything's okay. And it only gets worse because 26% of millennials of 18 to 25 say that they experienced some sort of mental illness or exhibit signs of that. Only 14% of ages 50 and older. Now listen, I don't think for a second that you people who are 50 and older in this room have just have life so figured out and all your coping skills so nailed that you're the healthiest bunch in the room. Listen, if you're a dude over 50 and you're like, I don't struggle with depression. Yes, you do. You're just stubborn. Listen, all of us at some point have experienced a season of melancholy. We all have. If you haven't, you're a psychopath or you're not paying attention. All of us experience anxiety in excessive ways. Everybody in this room has had a suicidal thought. Everybody. The difference with healthy and unhealthy is how we cope with those things. I also thought it was really interesting that 50% of adolescents show sign of a mental disorder. And if we understand that health is to walk in a sense of stability and worth, is it any wonder that half of our high school students have no idea how to cling on to stability and worth? We are all of us broken. We are all of us at times weak and in need of help. There is none of us in here who is singularly and individually strong and healthy. And we need to acknowledge that as we seek to offer empathy to others. The next thing we can do to love people towards health is to celebrate courageous choices. We need to start celebrating courageous choices. When somebody makes a decision to get help, when somebody makes a decision to be vulnerable and confess, we need to praise those things. We need to celebrate those things. We don't need to deride those things. I've talked a lot about counseling in this sermon. One of the things that breaks my heart is that counseling gets such a stigma that people, when you start talking about going to see a therapist or going to see a counselor, that we automatically think, man, only broken people do that. What's going on in your life? What can you not get together yourself? Why do you need help that you need to go talk to a professional to do that? Are you crazy? What's wrong with you? What have you failed at? How did you ruin your marriage? When did you get fired? We just assume that when people are going to see a therapist or going to see a counselor, that there's something broken in them. But here's the thing, there's something broken in all of us, so we need to stop it. Sometimes, most of the time, the unhealthy coping mechanisms that we have are so deeply embedded and ingrained in us that we can't see them. We don't know how to find them ourselves. And we need a trained professional to talk with us and help us see those and then help us see a way through them. We need trained professionals who are more than pastors. I'm very quick to go, listen, I wanna try to help you as best I can. I'm gonna pray for you. You need to talk to a therapist, not because you're crazy, but because they're good at it. The other thing I've learned is when you talk to somebody who will say, I should really go speak to a counselor about this. A lot of times they won't. And at first they won't because it's a pride thing. I don't want to do that. I don't want people to see me parking at that office. I don't want people to think that there's something wrong with me. I don't want people to think that I can't handle it or that I'm weak somehow. I don't want all the stuff that goes with seeing a counselor. So I'm not gonna go do that. And it seems like pride. But when you start to peel back the layers, what you find is that it's really fear. I'm convinced that the reason, if you're thinking about seeing a counselor, getting help, working through some unhealth in your life, I'm convinced that one of the big reasons we don't do that is because we know good and well what we're going to have to walk through when we get there. We don't want to have to look at ourselves in the mirror. It is easier to cope. It is easier to demur. It is easier to distract than it is to confront. And so we keep walking away from our unhealthy selves instead of turning and allowing someone to hold up a mirror and show us and work through it and walk through it and emerge on the other side more healthy. It's often fear that keeps us from getting help, not pride. And so I want you to know this morning that I think it takes bravery to go get help. And I actually think, and I would love for our church to start thinking about it this way, that counseling is not for the broken. It's for the brave. Counseling is not for broken people. It's for brave people. If it were for broken people, then we'd all be in it because we're all broken. But at some point or another, you have to take a step and make a decision that I want some help. I want to be healthy. I want somebody else's voice in this conversation helping me identify the unhealthy pockets in my life to restoring me to my God-given sense of security and value and love. And since I can't find my way out of this mess myself, I want to get someone else to speak into it for me. And that takes bravery and courage. The counseling is not the broken. It's for the brave. My prayer is that 2020 will be the healthiest year for you in a long, long time. For those of you who are brave enough to pursue health, I think it begins with acknowledging and identifying the unhealthy ways we bring ourselves a sense of security and worth. And doing the work to replace that coping mechanism with one that pushes us towards God's sovereignty and pushes us towards God's love. If we have people in our lives this year that we're trying to love towards mental health, we need to do it with empathy and compassion. And we need to, as a church and as a Christian subculture, destigmatize what it is to get help and admit that we all need it. And it's not for the broken, it's for the brave. I hope that some of you will make courageous choices, even this week. If you do want to talk to a counselor, email me and I'll work to find you a good one. I'm not going to send you to mine, but somebody. If there's someone in your life who is struggling, please, please offer them empathy. Please offer them compassion. Please offer them understanding. Try the best you can to put yourself in their shoes and love them from that perspective. And let's make this year a healthy year. Let's pray. Father, we do love you. We thank you so much for loving us. God, if there is anybody here who feels unworthy, who feels unvaluable, who feels unloved, God, may they just feel a pervasive sense of your love and your compassion wrapping around them today. Help them to hear the voices in their life that speak for you and tell them that they are enough. God, if we feel unsafe or insecure, I pray that you would restore that sense of security with your sovereignty. God, for those here who are struggling, who are sad, or who are anxious, or dealing with a multitude of other things, help them feel your peace today. Help them feel your hope today. Remind them that that hope, your word says, will not be put to shame. God, I pray that we would be healthy, that we would walk in a sense of security in you, of value in you, and that that would enable us to love other people well on your behalf. It's in your son's name we pray, amen.